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Really need some quick advice

(13 Posts)
InvisibleAt53 Tue 11-Apr-17 19:59:10

There are some items locked in my garage which my soon to be ExH claims are his and he wants them back. I dispute they are all his. He can't prove they are and I can't prove they're mine as neither of us have receipts.

Last weekend, he attacked me but got of with it as he convinced the police it was self-defence.

He's coming across to them as very plausible and believable but the truth of the matter is he is telling lies but I can't prove it as nobody else was there.

The police appear to have sided with him. Tonight, he came to pick up his dog - as agreed between the police and me - but really wanted to have them intimidate me into letting him into the garage to take his stuff. I wouldn't let them and one officer in particular was really aggressive and clearly on his side. She told me it was her right to offer him advice and in fact, several of her colleagues had also given him advice. The whole experience left me very shaken.

I'm already suffering panic attacks because of the verbal and physical abuse from him and now it seems the police are having a go at me too.

He wants in the garage to photograph the goods they I assume he'll try to lay claim to all of them. He owes me £20k and is about to leave the country so these things are the only leverage I have against him.

The police were really pressuring me to let him in to take photographs, or at least pick up certain items. If I open up the garage then he'll be right in there and I'm at a disadvantage.

The officer said if I sell anything belonging to him, I'll be arrested and done for theft. But he can't prove ownership and without a photograph, how can he prove they were ever there?

I'm now frightened they can issue a warrant or an order to seize the property in my garage. Help

MrsBertBibby Tue 11-Apr-17 20:10:55

Anything you don't agree is yoursvor his has to be determined by the court. It is not a police matter.

Have you been to court over finances? Has an order been made? What does it say about chattels?

InvisibleAt53 Tue 11-Apr-17 20:28:01

This has literally just happened. We haven't been to court about anything.

As far as I'm aware, me having the goods on my property (he left them there voluntarily before the incident) is a civil matter and not the jurisdiction of the police. She literally told me if I sell them, I'd be arrested.

But I won't let him in to see what's there in the first place so it's his word against mine.

She was very pushy and aggressive, making me feel I could be arrested any time.

InvisibleAt53 Tue 11-Apr-17 20:32:07

Also, if I'm not home and my 15 year old daughter answers the door to the police, should she just tell them I'm not home and they can't do anything about it.

Collaborate Tue 11-Apr-17 23:08:46

If they contact you again I suggest that you demand the name of their sergeant at the station. They are straying in to territory that they have no right to be in. As MrsBertBibby says, it isn't a police matter. He should be advised to pursue it through the court if there is a dispute. You have control of the items, and for the police to pressure you in this way is unethical and inappropriate.

AdaColeman Tue 11-Apr-17 23:20:33

While all this is still fresh in your memory write a very detailed record of it all, times, who said what, etc etc, with as much information as you can. Did you get their names or numbers? Make sure you get them next time.
Refuse to see them if you are alone, tell them you want someone with you as a witness.

AprilSkies44 Tue 11-Apr-17 23:23:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsBertBibby Tue 11-Apr-17 23:39:52

Obviously you can't sell or dispose of it, whilst this is getting sorted.

InvisibleAt53 Wed 12-Apr-17 09:34:26

Could I please ask one more question.

As he has been supporting me whilst I find a job, he is now leaving me with no financial support whatsoever.

Is there any way I can apply for an urgent spousal maintenance order before he leaves the country?

AdaColeman Wed 12-Apr-17 10:25:44

Sorry I can't help over maintenance, but I want to point out that there are protocols for dividing possesions at the end of a marriage, he can't just take whatever he fancies.
For instance normal household goods remain in the house where the main home of the children will be, so that the children are disadvantaged as little as possible. Your solicitor will be able to tell you more.
If he does take anything, keep a detailed record of it.

InvisibleAt53 Wed 12-Apr-17 13:07:46

Thank you for that. Yes, I've been doing some research into it.

I've just received an email from him to say he'll come over on Monday to collect his fishing equipment, a hoover, work boots and tools. He was too nice and pleasant and I just don't trust him. I think something may be afoot but I don't know what.

AdaColeman Wed 12-Apr-17 13:23:28

I would say yes to collecting work tools etc, but the hoover (unless you have two) stays with the household basic equipment for the benefit of the child.
If you do agree to give it to him, list it with a replacement value and include that in the final share out/division of goods.
If the tools etc were bought from joint assets during the marriage, again list their value for inclusion in final settlement.

Keep copies of absolutely every message between you.

Best of luck! thanks

Megatherium Wed 12-Apr-17 13:30:02

Tell him and the police you are exercising a legal lien over the goods as security for the money he owes you. Tell him he can collect the fishing stuff etc if he pays at least £5K towards his debt.

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