Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Ex p lying about previous contact.

(1 Post)
Booboo66 Mon 10-Apr-17 14:37:01

Very long story short I left exp over 3 years ago when DC were 4 and 10 months due to extreme drug and alcohol use and he'd turned to dealing to pay for it. He was very emotionally abusive and threatened a lot though no actual violence towards me had a history of violence towards others. I left at the first opportunity I had but the children were in a less than ideal situation for a while. He was never actively involved in their lives during the time we were together, just turned up, slept and left again. Anyway fast forward 2 years to last Feb and he tracked us down. Claimed how sorry he was, had changed, accepted fault for everything and just wanted a small amount of contact with kids. He was living 300 miles away and was happy with whatever I offered. I stupidly believed him. He's a very convincing liar.i did everything I could to help re introduce him to the children though stated from the start that under no circumstances would I allow him to have them alone. Mainly as he is barely able to look after himself let alone 2 small children. He started contributing financially at this stage too and o allowed him to pay half of what cms would allocate to enable him to travel on a semi regular basis and allowed Skype calls, even allowed him to stay in my home so he could have contact with the kids. This happened on about 3 occasions between Feb and July and I travelled down once with the children so the children could see those grandmother who was visiting. After this things started unraveling his calls to the children all but stopped and his behaviour became very erratic. After no contact over the entire summer in August he informed me he was moving to be near us and had basically decided we would get back together.. I was clear this wouldn't happen and when he realised this was the truth he turned very nasty to the point I had to call police and he was charged and given bail conditions not to contact me. Maintenance payments stopped then. He broke these several times but police could not prove it and as he lied he got away with it. In November I get a bizarre letter from a lawyer stating he'd had regular fortnightly residential contact with children that I had suddenly stopped .. Completely untrue and my lawyer responded saying so and explains bail conditions which he hadn't mentioned. At this point we offered mediation with a view to contact in a centre. No response. Now 5 months later the same letter from a different lawyer, my lawyer sent a copy of the original letter to and from lawyer. This time he has accepted the mediation and is still maintaining that's he's had regular residential contact. As previously said he's a very convincing and compulsive liar and I'm so scared he will some how get away with this and get granted this in the long run. Anyone come across this sort of thing before? Sorry for the massively long story .. There is also a lot more to it re his past but it was all carried out in a different country and I worry how much is actually on record! Honestly don't even know if any sort of contact is the right thing to do but I worry if I deny it, therefore paving the way for him to get legal aid he will be given access through court!

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: