My husband has just started talking therapy, supposedly it was meant to be to seek help for narcissistic traits and adult ADD, diagnosed a couple of years ago, but after his initial screening session i got home after a week away to find a piece of paper on my bedside table - unfolded it to see what it was, and the words 'domestic abuse refuge' and 'child social services' leapt out at me. Asked him about it and he said that after his screening the person he'd spoken to had contacted child social services because she was concerned about our 4 year old daughter's welfare... and he'd been called by SS shortly afterwards. It seems my husband had said we'd argued in front of our daughter (which at times, largely in the past, we have done, much to our shame). He did not choose to share this information with me for some unfathomable reason, even though i am her mother and it directly involves her welfare, and he admitted that if i hadnt seen the bit of paper he probably wouldn't have told me, thus setting up a situation whereby the first i would've heard about social services' involvement would have been when they actually came knocking on the door. Im also concerned that there was lots of stuff scribbled down about potential therapy options for him but nothing related to narcissism or ADD; it was all stuff about domestic abuse and cbt for low mood and anxiety - he has at numerous times in the past accused me of abusing him emotionally, and while at times i have in anger said extremely hurtful (albeit true) things that I'm not proud of, in private he has (begrudgingly) conceded that he is responsible for the majority of our problems and done some truly shameful things, that i lash out in response to unacceptable behaviour on his part (not that this justifies it, i know) and that he needs to address his narcissistic leanings. But it seems like now he's trying to depict me as an abusive monster and himself as a victim and terrifyingly as a result social services are now involved. My question is, what happens now? My daughter and i are currently based at my mum's in another town (husband and i are meant to be relocating there but hadn't found a house by the time my daughter had to start school so good old nanna to the rescue). Will someone just show up at her house (it appears he's given them her address) and start asking questions? Will they contact her new school? Will they want to interview my daughter? Wont that be distressing for someone so young and going through lots of upheaval? Away from home, new town, new school, etc. I'm terrified by all these stories you hear of overly zealous social workers and I'm also increasingly concerned that my husband is trying to set me up, although even as i write that i realise how paranoid and borderline crazy it sounds. I can't speak to him im so angry and have had to stay away from him and my daughter all day so that my anger at him doesn't ruin her weekend back home before we head back to my mum's tomorrow. i just dont know what to do or think. Any advice or info about SS involvement and what to expect/how best to protect my daughter, and myself, would be much appreciated.
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Husband has involved social services. What happens next?
5 replies
Arggghhhh · 17/09/2016 22:01
OP posts:
hesterton ·
17/09/2016 22:05
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