Contact Order and Contact centre.

[mrsdarcey78]

Hi I have been issued with court papers for three kids ages 18 14 and 9. I am waiting for legal aid to call me back tomorrow and I hope to get a solicitor. From what I have been told and gathered the 18 and 14 year old can choose what if any contact they want. None of the children want to see him and we haven't seen him in two years this was totally out of the blue. There was domestic abuse and bullying. If worse case scenario, he gets contact with the 9 year old, and its in a contact centre, (which after two years no contact and DV etc would imagine it would be), what if she refuses to go to it? If I try to persuade her and she refuses to go what happens then? She will be year 5 this year at school 10 in April. could there be indirect contact suggested?. she really does not want to go. any help appreciated thank you xxx

[Fourormore]

It's your job to make her go. Same as if she was refusing to go to school.

The courts don't like to make no contact orders so if supervised contact didn't work, there could be an order made for indirect contact, or you could suggest that indirect contact was attempted before supervised contact to give the child time to come to terms with having direct contact.

[ayeokthen]

She needs an education, she doesn't need to be forced to see a bullying abusive parent who hasn't bothered his shirt for over 2 years, it's not the same thing at all. Try and contact a child advocacy worker in your area OP, they're an independent who can speak for your child in court thus avoiding the wee one having to give evidence etc. You can also apply for a safeguarder to be appointed, someone who assesses both sides independently and reports to the court. Good luck OP, it's a tough process, emotionally battering for you and your kids, but if you lay your points out reasonably and with evidence hopefully the court will listen.

[titchy]

Kids don't give evidence in court

[ayeokthen]

Mine was called, I refused and got him an advocacy worker instead so his voice could be heard but he wouldn't be traumatised.

[Fourormore]

Are you in England/Wales, aye? It's not common for children to be called to give evidence.

[ayeokthen]

No I'm in Scotland. I was absolutely livid that his so called father would call him, and was able to. Thankfully the sheriff took my submission that his age combined with ASD was a reason for him not to be called.

[ayeokthen]

I didn't realise it was different in England/Wales, sorry. My advice about an advocacy worker is still valid tho, sometimes we get so caught up in what is happening, the kids lose their voice. I wanted DS to be able to be heard without him being traumatised by giving evidence.

[cestlavielife]

Can you ask for it to be facilitated by a family therapist /psychologist ? Ypur dd will need support if forced to go and it needs more than a contact centre.