I am at the end of my tether with ex H.
We have an agreement which says the DC should be available at 6pm Friday and back 6.30 pm Sunday. (Every other weekend) I used to drop them because I tried everything to keep things civil , but ex is always being nasty and controlling so I put my foot down and have now said come 6pm Friday if you want to see them. Now he says he can't commit to it (I knew it - he wants an easy life of me dropping them) and might come Friday's, might come Saturday's and as I wanted custody, I have to suck it up. This is amongst all sorts of things like calling me a shit mum, mentally unstable etc etc. DC1 has a Sunday activity which requires commitment and ex always makes an excuse not to take him, which just adds to it.
Anyway, can my ex do this? I never say on a Sunday evening that I can't have the boys because its inconvenient - I always make sure I'm there for them but he just uses me. Last week DH had to take one dc to work and I took two to work because my ex neither came nor was I going to let him keep controlling me. If he doesn't want to take any steps to see them, I want rid of the court order - I can neither go away with my family because he can click his finger and demand his rights, nor can I carry on with my weekend work because I don't know if he will come or not.
I have given 4 years to him for the boys sake (though he has even physically assaulted me when he failed to return the dc once and I went to collect them), he tells the DC all sorts about me (which eldest copies now) - heck he even pulls down his underwear and passes wind in their faces ( he did worse with me when we were married )
I just want an end to the control - it's like his last hurrah . If he had any concern or care for the DC, I would do anything for them... But it's all about control and games.
Anyway what are my options? I am trying to give him a chance to make arrangement eg his wife collect the DC or he sort out his work hours (like I have to) but he's already told me he's not going to and "doesn't have to".
Is this a basis to end the agreement?
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what happens when a contact order is broken? is it "optional"?
31 replies
Pendu · 27/06/2016 13:40
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