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Police came to my house after a someone heard my 2yr old crying.

(12 Posts)
Bibacatface Mon 23-May-16 14:28:07

Last night I was shocked to find to police officers at my door and peering through my living room window. I opened the door and let the two of them in and they told me that they'd had a call from an anonymous caller that my child was crying and calling out and could have been injured. I told them that I'd only lived at my address a week and my 2yr dd cried almost every night when I put her to bed between 7 and 8 o clock. One of the officers started to climb the stairs saying that they needed to check on her. I told her to wait until I was upstairs so my daughter wouldn't be scared of them. I then brought my dd downstairs so they could see that my dd was not in any distress as, as soon as I let her come downstairs she acted her normal self and was playing around as usual. Then a third police officer just walked in, looked around then chatted to one out of earshot. I asked the remaining officer if this non-incident would be logged on file or if social services would be informed, as a malicious call was made to the police about my son years ago and I received a letter from social services to say there would be no further action. One of the police officers asked which doctor we were registered with and took details of everyone living in the house i.e. my dd my son and myself. The police officer told me that there would be a review if there were more domestic calls made. I obviously am worried about this. Will they be called up every time my daughter cries at bedtime? How can they call this a domestic call out, when I did nothing wrong and my children aren't at risk.

Paddingtonthebear Mon 23-May-16 14:32:53

If you've only lived at the house for one week and your daughter has cried every night at bedtime for a reasonable length of time I think maybe your neighbours are concerned. That doesn't mean you've done anything wrong but maybe they aren't used to the crying and as they don't know you they find it a worry . It is lengthy crying every night? Perhaps introducing yourself to neighbours and explaining you have a child that cries a lot may help. Children do make a lot of noise that some people find intrusive and irritating. If your child is crying a lot and is sounding distressed then it's not unusual that people will worry.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Mon 23-May-16 14:36:56

Is she crying for the whole hour? Is that normal for her, or has moving made this worse?

I guess you've just moved, and nobody knows you. Someone's heard that a child is crying for an hour every night and obviously hasn't heard you settling her or tending to her, and felt the best thing to do was to call the police. It was, really - don't see it as malicious. If something had happened to you, you'd be glad someone had called to check on your child. It's very unlikely that they called to make your life difficult.

The police will have recorded the call and the details that the caller made - how long she'd been crying for, how often she's been heard, etc. They then came to see you and they'll write up what you say - that she cries at night but is fine, that you bought her downstairs and she seemed fine. They'll send the file to social services who will either close the case and write to you or arrange a visit to talk to you.

You seem to have taken this very personally. There's an obligation to report to this type of thing, and an obligation for the police to attend and make sure everything is okay.

The only real thing that you can do is take on board that someone can hear her quite clearly whilst she's crying and it seems to be bothering them. What you can do about that depends on how she usually goes to sleep. If she's usually good but you're sleep training and it'll be over after a week or so, you're probably okay. If her current routine is screaming for an hour whilst you try to ignore her so she'll sleep, you might have to adjust a bit to avoid her being constantly reported by the people who overhear. It's tough with little ones.

SolsburyHell Mon 23-May-16 15:55:49

They can call it a domestic call out because that's what it was. They are doing their job, responding to a call by a concerned Neighbour, doing a welfare check and recording relevant information. Nothing more will probably happen but it all adds to a bigger picture that helps decide if children are at risk or not.

Agencies-police, health, social services, education are just under pressure to make sure that no more children slip through the net with tragic circumstances. That means responding to and recording all reports such as this.

Bibacatface Mon 23-May-16 18:27:55

She only cries for about 10 minutes and it's not been every night, just more often than not. I have taken it personally I guess it's being a single parent in a new area and not knowing anybody.I did feel a bit intimidated when the third police officer walked in. and I know they're just doing their job. I'm just worried about what if anything will happen next, I mean will it go on file? Will I be referred to social services? And will this happen every time my dd cries for more than a few minutes?

AnchorDownDeepBreath Mon 23-May-16 18:31:29

No don't worry. Someone will have just been concerned. Do try not to take it personally - I know it's hard but it'll make it feel so much worse than it is.

It was a domestic call out because they were called out to domestic premises. They wouldn't have left if they weren't satisfied. They definitely wouldn't have left her.

If she's only crying for ten minutes or so, at the same time each night, the neighbour will quickly learn that it's just bedtime and nothing bad is happening to her

CurlyhairedAssassin Mon 23-May-16 18:45:12

No, I can't believe that a neighbor would have called the police for 10 mins of crying each night. Either there is more crying at other times, or it's another malicious call.

AndSoWeBeatOn Mon 23-May-16 18:50:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bibacatface Mon 23-May-16 18:58:13

I've contacted the police and the officer that made the report will be getting back to me so I can ask him about my concerns. Thanks for all of your messages. I realise that children do sometimes end up in tragic circumstances and it is better to check out a concerned report than to ignore it. I still don't understand why they asked about which doctor we are registered with, but I'll ask. I just think as one of the replies said my dd is just taking a bit of time adjusting to her new environment and she'll be back to normal soon. I'm sure that my dd isn't unusual in crying at bedtime. I'll ask the officer if he's ever heard of it happening before :D

winchester1 Mon 23-May-16 19:04:25

I assume as your wanting her to sleep she is shouting mummy mummy etc with you not responding. If I heard that pre kids id worry you were injured and a toddler was effectively alone in the house. If I didn't know you I'd prob call the police to check you were ok. Looking through windows seems they weren't expecting you to be able to answer the door.

With a 18month and 2.5 yr old of my own, at bedtime I'm just glad I don't have neighbours grin

AndSoWeBeatOn Mon 23-May-16 19:17:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nightpiano Mon 23-May-16 20:45:42

I know how terrifying it is to have the police and social workers check your children. I have been there (domestic violence, and they were concerned that it might have been going on longer than I admitted).

They are just doing their job. They asked about the doctors because they probably want to check that your doctor has no concerns. They needed to see your child to check on welfare (police officers traipsed upstairs to see my children sleeping).

In my case, the children had witnessed domestic violence and were therefore genuinely at risk. Still, the social worker came once, then closed the case saying that she had no concerns if my husband stayed away.

You may or may not get a social worker visiting you (probably not, from what you have said). If all is well, then you really don't need to worry about this.

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