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I am a SAHM, will this affect a mortgage in any way?

(31 Posts)
SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:08:58

When now-DH and I were 18 and 20 (me being 18, we had been together since 15 and 17) DH bought a house, we decided that as we were so young, it seemed silly to tie ourselves together buying a house so I didn't go on any of the paperwork, bills etc. We are now 24 and 26, married with a 4yo DD, and we are now selling this house, on Monday, we are expecting a call from an estate agent with an offer from a woman who has been to view the house, and again to measure up for her sofa grin

DH has been to see our mortgage broker to see how much he can get on a mortgage. Last night I said to DH, 'Just think, I'll finally own a house!' And he said he wasn't sure if the fact that I'm a SAHM will affect how much he can get, so we'll have to ask the broker when we're at the stage for actually applying for said mortgage. He was basically implying that if my status as SAHM affected the amount then I wouldn't be going on the paperwork. I can't see how it would affect it though? Can anyone shed any light on this?

plantsitter Sat 19-Mar-16 10:11:11

I don't see how it would make any difference, since you are a dependent anyway (me too by the way). As long as your name is on the deeds you own the house whether you're on the mortgage or not, and as you're married the same applies. I am not an expert though!

Foxsox Sat 19-Mar-16 10:11:34

It will be based on your household income. So the multiples will only be on gross salary is any benefits you may get.
You are married so whether or not you are named in the mortgage it's still half yours.

VulcanWoman Sat 19-Mar-16 10:12:32

You being a SAHM will in no way stop you being on the paperwork.

VulcanWoman Sat 19-Mar-16 10:14:40

Do you think your husband truly doesn't realise this or do you feel anyway uneasy about the way he's carrying on.

VulcanWoman Sat 19-Mar-16 10:16:49

Plus was it his idea to do that with your first house. You'd be best to go to the broker too, so you know what's going on.

Fairylea Sat 19-Mar-16 10:18:15

Being a sahm has nothing to do with going on the paperwork, including the deeds to the house. If everyone agrees you can put whoever you like on the deeds! (At one point my mum, dad, gran and me all owned equal portions of a house - my gran was in her 70s and I was 18 with no income!)

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:20:14

I didn't think it would make a difference, I'm sure he said that me and DD were named as dependants anyway so surely I'm 'on there'? confused I don't know, I don't fully understand all this mortgage stuff. I'll make sure I get to the next meeting though and ask the question myself. I couldn't go yesterday as the appointment was 3.20 and I had to get DD from school.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:21:54

It was actually my idea Vulcan, and he agreed. At the time I was only 18, if we had broken up I didn't want to be stuck tied to him financially so I suggested that I stayed off any paperwork.

insancerre Sat 19-Mar-16 10:22:05

When we bought our first house it was a joint mortgage in both our names even though I was a sahm and had no earnings
I couldn't imagine doing it any other way

AnchorDownDeepBreath Sat 19-Mar-16 10:22:17

I think you have to be on both - very few banks will let you be on the deeds without being on the mortgage, as they couldn't chase you for non-payment of the mortgage, but also couldn't take ownership of the house because you owned part.

However, going on the mortgage shouldn't be a problem - presumably you've already done all the affordability stuff and you know how much you're likely to be able to borrow based on your husbands income with you and your children as dependants?

I'd second the poster saying you should both go to the brokers so that you both know where you stand. Your husband could genuinely be misunderstanding, or he could be uncertain about letting you onto the paperwork now and "sharing" the asset that has been his so far (although realistically this doesn't matter because you're married, it's just easier if you are both on the paperwork).

Go with him, however hard it is, and make sure you both understand what is happening. If you are offered two figures, one not including you, your budget is whatever the figure that does include you is.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:33:32

Yes Anchor, DH went yesterday to see how much he could get (and it was much more than we had assumed it would be!), he said that was with me and DD named as dependants, we can afford it as the monthly payments came back as £25 more than what he's already paying so that's not a problem.

I think it's partly both, he doesn't fully understand and he's a bit uncertain. He's been brought up believing 'take care of number 1' i.e. yourself (and now DD), his family are very reluctant to share anything of value that they have bought, with anyone else. DH is much better than the rest of his family, although it's always still there, niggling away in the back of his head.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:35:34

Rather than the old phrase 'What's mine is yours.' with his family it's 'What's mine is mine.'

Llareggub Sat 19-Mar-16 10:37:53

Seriously, you need to get yourself to the point where you do understand. Knowledge is power.

God forbid anything does go wrong, but my marriage did and I thank my lucky stars that I was the one that always understood the financial aspects of our lives and was capable to supporting myself. Don't stay vulnerable.

JeanSeberg Sat 19-Mar-16 10:40:01

I'd be very wary. Do you have qualifications/previous career/work experience that you can return to at some stage? His attitude of looking after number one doesn't have your interests at heart so in your shoes I would be looking at gaining some financial independence.

Alanna1 Sat 19-Mar-16 10:41:47

I second getting yourself to where you do understand. And also could you do something to increase your skills so that you could have a PT job esp when your DC start school? Don't be totally dependent on someone else - no matter how lovely!

QuiteLikely5 Sat 19-Mar-16 10:50:06

You're married so it's half yours anyway.

He obviously doesn't realise this.

His attitude imo does not bode well for the future though......

Collaborate Sat 19-Mar-16 10:55:47

To be fair, when assessed on joint incomes the multiple they'll lend is lower than when assessed on a single income.

Good idea though to get on the deeds if you can.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 10:57:29

I didn't say it was his attitude. I said that's how he's been brought up, he is much better than his family but this thought is still niggling away in the back of his head.

VulcanWoman Sat 19-Mar-16 11:25:53

We're a load of paranoids grin, seriously though, keep yourself informed. Best wishes in your new home.

SexLubeAndAFishSlice Sat 19-Mar-16 11:30:39

Is there anything online that I can read up about this?

JeanSeberg Sat 19-Mar-16 19:59:00

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/relationships/living-together-marriage-and-civil-partnership/living-together-and-marriage-legal-differences/#h-housing

Look at the housing section in the link above.

"If you are the sole or joint owner of the home, your partner will not be able to sell it without your agreement.

However, if your partner is the sole owner, you will need to register your home rights in order to protect your interests. Unless you register your home rights, you will not be able to prevent your partner from selling the home or be able to remain there if it is sold."

DollyMcDolly Sat 19-Mar-16 20:17:00

I was a SAHM when we bought our house. My name is on the mortgage. Wasn't a problem at all

museumum Sat 19-Mar-16 20:22:01

You have marital rights over the property so you may as well be on the mortgage and deeds as joint owner. Please do insist.

tribpot Sat 19-Mar-16 20:37:05

It's probably a good idea if he learns something about matrimonial assets - you already own a house, you live in it.

For clarity I would say you want to be on the deeds as it better reflects the property's ownership. I hope his response to this is positive.

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