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CAO hearing... Ex lying and vague cafcass report

(3 Posts)
dontknowwhoiam Wed 16-Mar-16 07:44:54

There's another thread on legal but not sure how to link...

Basically my ex is a controlling, abusive, horrible person. I've facilitated contact with 2 DCs but he's now taking me to court for CAO.

He has requested 1 night every weekend. I've countered that with the suggestion of 2 nights EOW. I believe it to be best for the DCs so that they get a chunk of quality time on the weekends with both of us.

Just discovered from CAFCASS report that he's now lying about his availability, saying he is only available for 24 hours a week because of work commitments. This is complete rubbish but now I'm scared that he's going to get his own way rather than anything being arranged for the sake of the DCs.

Also CAFCASS report has failed to mention the emotional abuse and counselling I'm receiving; and states we should "put aside our differences"! I'm really upset that this had been minimised; the children are not at risk and I kept the interview factual and business like, but past abuse obviously has an impact upon how we communicate now and the fact that he doesn't really "do" negotiating.

I'm feeling bullied and worried I'm going to look unreasonable: How can we try to negotiate the best arrangement for the DCs when ex is saying he's only free for 1 day a week due to work? There's no room to negotiate. Do I stand my ground and insist he's lying? Do I just put it in the hands of the court?

Ozwizard Thu 17-Mar-16 14:08:01

He is only free for 1 day a week is a weak excuse. He is a parent and the children are not supposed to fit into his schedule for his benefit. Stick to your suggestion of EOW as you will not come across as being obstructive. Try not to get drawn into you and him as it is irrelevant as the courts and cafcass are there for the best result for the children. I'm sorry he has been abusive but hopefully the courts may see through this.

dontknowwhoiam Tue 10-May-16 23:52:16

I've only just noticed this reply and wanted to say thank you (sorry it's so late in coming!) Pleased to say it's all over now and the courts did see through him. Thank you again flowers

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