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Stop trying

(8 Posts)
Bethmaddy15 Fri 30-Jan-15 22:23:02

I need some major Advice.
I was only young when I had my little girl me and my ex have been on and off for 3 years. He's been in and out of her life a lot. He isn't mature enough to handle father responsibility no matter how much I try and give them to him. We finally called it off last year in September I'm now with someone new who's amazing with my little girl I offered my ex weekend access for her to stay over he told me he would rather spend it with his new girlfriend and her kids. I tried to ring him tonight to speak to him about parents evening and about her day at nursery and he turned his phone off I tried to send numerous pictures he blocked me. He's told me he doesn't want her. What can I do?

Littlefish Fri 30-Jan-15 22:26:15

I don't think there's anything you can do to make him have a relationship with her.

All you can do is offer him the chance so that you can honestly say to your dd in years to come that you did everything you could to encourage a relationship between them.

Does he support your financially?

Bethmaddy15 Fri 30-Jan-15 22:28:11

He's 18 we was both young when we had her. He doesn't help with a penny I've done everything since before she was born. It's getting to the point where I'm thinking well if I got back with him he would want her. That's the only time he seemed interested in her it starts to upset me

Littlefish Fri 30-Jan-15 22:41:47

You need to make the arrangements formal and contact the CSM (used to be called the CSA) and ensure that he supports his dd financially.

You need to think of yourself and your dd and move on without him. He has made it completely clear that he is not interested in a relationship with you.

Bethmaddy15 Fri 30-Jan-15 22:44:40

It was only a week ago he was ringing me asking me back while he knows I have a new partner. He was interested In her then but now it's stopped and he would rather be with his new girlfriend and her two kids

Bethmaddy15 Fri 30-Jan-15 22:46:13

My new partner is great with my little girl. He's older and he has his own daughter a few years older and he doesn't understand why he wouldn't want her. I was crying for 4 hours the other night blaming myself. My ex is horrible the stuff he says and the way he treats me. I don't want him to treat my little girl like that but I want her to have a dad

Littlefish Fri 30-Jan-15 22:48:55

As I said, you can't make him have a relationship with her.

I would keep all communication to a minimum. Do not engage with anything he says unless it is an arrangement to see your dd, or pay for her upkeep.

I really would recommend doing things formally through the CSM.

Bethmaddy15 Fri 30-Jan-15 22:50:56

Thank you smile

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