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Having a residency order amended (a by consent order"

(14 Posts)
mumtobealloveragain Mon 10-Feb-14 16:32:01

Ex and I have a "by consent" shared residency order. There's a few fuzzy areas and it needs to be more specific and less ambiguous.

He's having a rare moment of being half reasonable about the kids (being an arse about our jointly owned property though).

Anyway. We've both agreed a number of amendments to be made. I want to use this opportunity as he's likely to be difficult about the kids/ gaps in clarity of the order again sometime soon as he has done so many times so it makes sense to get it tied down now whilst he's agreeable.

How do we amend an existing order if we both agree? I'm thinking surely I don't need to complete a C100, make the application, wait for a hearing and all attend Court just to make a few tweaks? Is there another way? Can we co sign a letter and make an application with the letter and current order and make an application for a it to be rewritten with amendments?

Any advice greatly received!

NanaNina Mon 10-Feb-14 17:00:59

Sorry I don't have an answer. My sense is that once a Residence Order is made the terms of such an Order will stand. I think you need legal advice, or maybe the Clerk of the Court where the Order was made could answer your query. Can I ask did you have legal representation at the time the RO was made? I know that legal aid is not available now for these private law cases. If you had legal rep then obviously you need to go back to that lawyer.

mumtobealloveragain Mon 10-Feb-14 17:14:24

No I didn't have legal representation. He did though. We agreed all the terms and the Judge made it into a "consent" order for us.

3xcookedchips Mon 10-Feb-14 21:51:34

Nina: If all you have is a sense why are you contributing to a legal board, especially as your only advice is to get legal advice?

yes you can change a consent order by agreement at any time if both of you agree. It would still be advisable to get legal advice on the changes and the new agreement can be sent to the court to be stamped, i.e. turned in to a new order.

No need for further hearings.

If you're an LIP check out Lucy Reeds, Family Courts Without A Lawyer.

mumtobealloveragain Mon 10-Feb-14 22:13:19


Thanks! I can't afford legal representation so do it all myself now.

I appreciate your advice. Hey are into minor tweaks to clarify times and dates so there is no misunderstandings (he can't used the ambiguity of the order to be an arse)

Do you know how we do it? Should we rewrite our order and make the amendments then both sign it and send it to the Court. Do we both need to attend and do I pay a Court fee? Does it supersede the current order if done this way?

mumtobealloveragain Mon 10-Feb-14 22:16:08

Sorry- got your name wrong blush

Yes, we have that book at home, very very useful. I am going to have a proper look through over the next few days

NanaNina Tue 11-Feb-14 00:03:23

Well I do beg your pardon 3xcookedchips I hadn't realised that you had to be a legal expert to post on these threads. The irony is that you are suggesting the OP gets legal advice too. And I think you are "showing off" a little with your legal terms (LIP) not many people including the OP I'm sure know that this means "Litigant in Person"

I am a retired social worker/middle manager and have a career spanning some 30 years. For the past 5 years I have worked independently and been involved in several private law cases, and am I think aware of some of the relevant issues.

Sorry OP - as you were..............I don't want to hi-jack your thread.

Collaborate Tue 11-Feb-14 01:34:54

There shouldn't be any need to go back to court. A simple exchange of letters or emails to record the new agreement is all you'll need. You can both agree to vary the arrangements any time without going back to court.

3xcookedchips Tue 11-Feb-14 17:05:56

...and yet after all that 'professional' experience pre and post retirement you still do not know an order can be 'varied' be agreement by the two parties.

Makes me wonder if during your 'professional' life you relied on your 'sense' or did you just wet your finger and put it up in the air to see what way the wind is blowing.

Thank goodness you are now retired but makes me wonder what benefit you bring now to your consultancy work...


nocontactforevermore Tue 11-Feb-14 23:23:23


Why are you being so vile to another poster who is simply offering a kind suggestion to the op?

You don't own this board and while I agree it is a legal boards there is nowhere to state that you must be legally qualified to post here. I also didn't see Nana claim anywhere that she was a lawyer.


NanaNina Wed 12-Feb-14 00:02:47

Thank you nocontact for your support but I think 3xcookedchip's post says more about her than it does about me!

3xcookedchips Wed 12-Feb-14 01:34:26


It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.

- Mark Twain

nocontactforevermore Wed 12-Feb-14 13:21:58

You're bullying another poster 3x

Remind me never to ask you for legal advice.

NanaNina Wed 12-Feb-14 14:21:20

This is getting ridiculous isn't it nocontact but don't worry about me - I don't feel bullied at all and if that is the chip person's intent it is unsuccessful!

Incidentally I don't thinks chips is a lawyer - she's probably an admin person who has picked up a bit of legal info along the way................!!..the work I carried out in these private law cases was I think rather more important than which forms could be used, or what could be added etc. My work was to carry out comprehensive assessments on parents who were totally unable to agree on arrangements for the children in divorce/separation, and of course the need in such cases is to focus on the best interests of the child rather than the parents, so it involved getting to know the children and getting some idea (or dare I say sense!!) of their wishes and feelings. I also observed the children with each of the parents separately and that was very informative, and I think was the most useful part of my assessment which led to my recommendation to the Court for the final hearing. I always felt so sorry for the children stuck in the middle of warring parents as this inevitable caused them considerable emotional distress.

Really sorry mumtob - I really don't want to hi jack your thread but it is I think most extraordinary that someone is behaving in such a way on this thread.

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