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Does my EXP have the right to keep his address secret?

(13 Posts)
SleepIsForNinnies Mon 10-Feb-14 13:53:43

We have one DC together, who sees my EXP through a contact centre (long story, I will give details if relevant!)

EXP has recently moved, and I wondered if he'd want to keep his new address a secret (he thinks the world is out to get him grin - as if anyone would bother!) Well, he's gone a step beyond keeping it a secret, and given our DC a FALSE new address. It doesn't exist either on Google or Royal Mail confused

The likeliest explanation is he's trying to dodge the CSA, but I also worry that he may at some point try to persuade our DC to move in with him, or possibly abduct DC. (In fairness this is not very likely, but still.)

As DC do not have any contact at his new address, do I have a case to ask him his address, or should I just respect his privacy?

LaurieFairyCake Mon 10-Feb-14 13:55:24

I think you need to know it if the children start visiting there but not while it's in a contact centre.

But the CSa need to know it - I'd follow him to get it for the CSa if it was me, unless it can be deducted from the employer

SleepIsForNinnies Mon 10-Feb-14 14:03:12

The B*STAR is self-employed - I get £20 a month hmm but I suspect his income is about to go up again (he has just got a new qualification).

He now lives 1.5 hours away from us (his choice) and I'm not entirely sure I'd be able to follow him all that way undetected even if I wanted to grin

You're quite right, the CSA should know.

lostdad Mon 10-Feb-14 14:13:42

Yes he does. You have no legal right to know where he lives even if your DC stay there.

It isn't an unreasonable expectation on your part of course but in terms of the law it is irrelevant.

quietlysuggests Mon 10-Feb-14 14:15:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SleepIsForNinnies Mon 10-Feb-14 14:27:09

lostdad - I'm not quite sure that is correct.... confused

quietly - thanks. Maybe I need to ask the contact centre.

Does anyone know who else could advice me on this? Is there a family law helpline, or a contact person at the courts? We've not been in court with this, don't have a social worker or a solicitor :/

NigellasDealer Mon 10-Feb-14 14:31:28

You have no legal right to know where he lives even if your DC stay there
oh hello? if i told SW that my children were going to an unknown destination for the weekend they would be putting a child protection plan in place (ok i am exagerrating but you get the idea)

SleepIsForNinnies Mon 10-Feb-14 14:36:09

Nigellas - that's what I thought too. smile

prh47bridge Mon 10-Feb-14 14:48:11

If you had moved to stop your ex harassing you (or worse) and contact was only via a contact centre, would you be happy if he had the legal right to know your address?

And talk about exaggerating. SS will not start putting child protection plans or anything else in place if you tell them that your children are with your ex but you don't know exactly where they are.

You have no right to know or control where your ex takes your children (provided it is within the country), what he does with them or who they meet while they are in his care.

NigellasDealer Mon 10-Feb-14 14:50:56

i suppose that is fair enough, thnking about it, any more than he would have the right to dictate what I do/where I stay

STIDW Mon 10-Feb-14 14:54:52

Lostdad is correct. There is no automatic legal right to be informed where your ex lives. He has the right to privacy (and a family life) under human rights legislation. However if an address is required to serve court papers or to locate a child the courts can order someone including government agencies to divulge his whereabouts to the court. A judge would then weigh up the rights of both parents and the particular facts to decide whether you should be informed of the address. Normally it wouldn't be unreasonable for a parent to know where their child sleeps at night but, for example, the address could be withheld from a perpetrator of abuse.

babybarrister Tue 11-Feb-14 15:02:15

if your ex sees DC va contact centre then I assume that there are proceedings. if there are proceedings then he cannot keep his address secret - he needs to apply for his address not to be disclosed to you - if he were successful [but he would have to show why this were needed] the court would still have to have his address on file...

LauraBridges Tue 11-Feb-14 16:18:37

There is no obligation to say the address. It can be confidential as others are saying.

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