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Restraining order - estranged father (long, sorry!)

(3 Posts)
Twitches2 Tue 04-Feb-14 11:31:43

Hi everyone,

Apologies if there's a better place to post this - just hoping someone can advise really. I'll try not to ramble on!

My father hasn't lived with us since I was a toddler as he was a violent alcoholic/inflicted physical and emotional abuse on me and my mother and has a history of being (dangerously) mentally unstable (which he refuses to aknowledge or get help for, due to living in a fantasy world and beliving his own lies).

I had contact with him as a child (EOW) which lasted until the constant emotional abuse became too much and, once I was older, I told him I no longer wanted him in my life.

Many years of nuisance calling, turning up unnaounced and stalking ensued with revolting abuse on a regular basis (verbally, in letters and in person when he got the chance) followed. This made me ill with fear/depression/totally destroyed any confidence I may have had.

Cut a long story short - a few years ago I found out he had a terminal illness with not long to go. Stupidly, I believed this and agreed to contact, so I could try and forgive him.

Not surprisingly he has reverted back to his old behaviour - he will lose his temper and be abusive the second he doesn't get his own way (usually when he feels he isn't getting enough attention, people aren't juming to his orders)

I have since found out the 'terminal illness' story is not true. I have explained time and again why his behaviour is unacceptable but he won't listen/doesn't care/decides to believe a different reality in which he is entirely innocent of any wrong-doing.

My question is: does anybody have any experience with restraining orders and how they work? Would I need to keep a record of his harrasment? I've already had to inform my building security at work.

Any help you can give would be much appreciated - apologies this was so long!

NadiaWadia Tue 04-Feb-14 18:36:59

I would like to know this too, on behalf of a relative. Any one?

Collaborate Tue 04-Feb-14 18:44:13

They usually tell someone not to communicate with the applicant, and/or go within a certain radius if home or work. Not that hard to get if you can prove (usually on your word) threats or harassment.

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