Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

hounded by his ex-wife

(10 Posts)
boobyooby Wed 09-Oct-13 16:45:04

A friend has pointed me to this site, my first time knowing it existed and my eldest is 15!! SO firstly, hello - I hope I can contribute to this site for some of you, although it is today I am asking for help

I hope someone can help me, I've been so stressed I've taken today off work as sick even though I can ill afford to have this on my attendance record as after my own divorce and DH's divorce was treated for depression for nearly 2 years with all the stress and took so much time off work I was eventually sacked.

That is all behind us and we are now married, have been for over a year, I'm back in work as of last September and loving it, and although things are tight financially (who isn't!) a letter landed on our doormat from the local county court for a notice of hearing in now 2 months from his ex-wife as she wants to use an 2010 document from their divorce proceedings against him to apply for a CSA variation as evidence he has assets and diverting his income ..... and if he doesn't agree she will charge him her solicitor costs and court fee. I've had a miscarriage (only early days (8-9 weeks) but has still shaken me up and I do blame the stress of this for it! )

I'm so worried for him and us, we can't afford more solicitor fees and court costs (both still paying off divorce debts) he does hold the title of director at his company but he gave the CSA his P60, payslips and dividend figures from day one to make sure the calculations were correct .... and now this. He isn't lying about his net income, the CSA told him what the figure was based on his gross and if anything it is less as his tax to be paid is more than they calculated now the accountant has had a look at the figures. Husband also now has a contact order and the children stay with us more than originally but his ex has made him agree not to inform the CSA of the new overnights (was approx 70 due to her, but court now ordered him to have 130 nights access) so has got us over a barrel, I think? Does he have to give my income details etc, my child maintenance I receive or any of my assets (he moved into my house but since we married I have had him added to the house deeds)?

Help sad

prh47bridge Wed 09-Oct-13 17:57:21

Why is she going through the courts? Does she think the courts will order a variation? The courts will only get involved in child maintenance in limited circumstances, e.g. if he has a very high income above the CSA/CMS limit. If she wants a variation on the basis of diversion of income she needs to apply through the CSA/CMS (no court fees or solicitors fees involved). If she is trying to get the courts to order the CSA to impose variation she will fail and she won't be able to get her costs from you.

Your income and assets are irrelevant unless he is diverting his income to you, i.e. paying himself a low salary but paying you an inflated salary.

boobyooby Wed 09-Oct-13 19:17:34

I think the document she wants to use (its a financial report on hubbies company) as her "evidence" from what I've read through it has a clause stating the document is only able to be used for the purpose it was created ie the divorce proceedings in 2010 so without his say so she can't send to the CSA ..... and I'm guessing asking a judge to say she can. I'm hoping year end accts in 2010 will be too old for CSA to even bother using?
His salary this year is roughly what it has been since 2010, he had one good year at work in 2009 and earned probably 30% more than in current years due the economic climate and she already receives nearly £500 a month as it is, if I got the same from my ex-h I'd keep very quiet!!

Thank you for the quick response, I'll try and breathe a little easier and update when I can smile

mumtobealloveragain Wed 09-Oct-13 23:24:54

So if she is playing dirty why doesn't he call the Csa tomorrow and inform them that he has the children 130 nights a year not 70 and his £500 a month payments will reduce.

Collaborate Wed 09-Oct-13 23:38:44

When did the CSA assume jurisdiction? They usually do their assessment based on the previous years income, though that isn't a hard and fast rule and they can exercise their discretion to calculate income by reference to historic income for a different period.

If at the time of the initial assessment the previous years figures were the 2009 ones that doesn't mean to say that his maintenance will be revised upwards. If the 30% more year was literally a one-off the CSA can disregard that 30% when calculating maintenance to be paid for the following year.

CocktailQueen Wed 09-Oct-13 23:41:42

Tell cs a you are having kids 130 not 70 nights a tear, and tell his ex to swivel!

boobyooby Thu 10-Oct-13 10:09:56

CSA were involved from May this year ........ and contact order was only stamped this September. We've had years of her rubbish, and I am in no doubt we will never be left alone, it's her BF I feel sorry for, having to put up with her and doubt they will ever marry as he must see how much he has to "lose" if they ever then split up! We just can do without solicitor costs when there are 4 kids to buy xmas presents for coming up, let alone her rubbish - I guess it is the last bit of control she is trying to exert over him as she has nothing else nowadays. He no longer plays to her guilt trips and as we now have to provide our own clothing for his children and all the travel to and fro for contact, her presence is now at minimum, except for this slanderous expensive latest tactic! Hmmmph

On a brighter note, haha just seen the thread everyone has been talking about - the funniest thing I have ever read :D

Collaborate Thu 10-Oct-13 12:46:16

He should object to the disclosure of the evidence from the divorce on the ground of relevance. What his income was in 2010 has no bearing on a CSA assessment that started in 2013.

boobyooby Tue 15-Oct-13 13:22:00

Thanks for your help. We have sent all the documents to the solicitor we used for the divorce and he will get back to us in the next day or so.

I'll report back the outcome, incase it helps anyone else for future, fingers crossed she gets nowhere smile

BooHissy Wed 16-Oct-13 23:38:54

I agree and I think you have to tell the CSA about the new overnight agreements.

She won't be too quick to threaten it again when she loses out.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now