Power of Attorney not appropriate so what is?

[Shellywelly1973]

My Mil has become seriously ill in just 2 weeks. 2 weeks ago she was diagnosed with cancer. 10 Days ago she deteriorated in just a few days from an independent & aware lady to an Incontinent, confused & scared old lady...its absolutely heart breaking.

She has lung cancer which has spread to her brain & liver. One of the brain tumours is pressing on the optical nerve so Mil is losing her sight by the day.

The problem is she has no will or arrangements in place. She has money in bank accounts but can't remember the pin numbers. Her utilities need to be reorganised. She lived in a council house for 41 years & that will need to be cleared & returned to the council house. She had 2 private pensions.

Whats the best why to handle this?

Would a power of attorney be the correct way to deal with this?

Should Dp go to a solicitor for advice?

[florencedombey]

Hello Shelly, I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL.

I'm sorry to say that, based on what you've written here, a lasting power of attorney is probably not going to help you, for two reasons. First, your MIL would have to be well enough to sign the document in the first place, and it sounds as though she isn't. Second, LPAs have to be registered at the Office of the Public Guardian in order to be valid and the registration process takes about six weeks, sometimes longer.

Is there anything financial that needs seeing to urgently? What's MIL's prognosis?

[Shellywelly1973]

Mil has been given 3 months... Very unlikely to be here for Christmas. The Drs decided this week not to do the radiotherapy or chemotherapy. Mil is on steroids to help with the tumours& even that treatment isn't as affective as the Drs had hoped.

Its mainly household bills & putting her bank accounts & pensions in order.

If we do nothing will the agencies/ banks/ companies deal with us when Mil passes away?

Is there an alternative document in situations such as ours?

Thankyou for replying

[TheDoctrineOfJetlag]

Is your DP the only child and the next of kin?

[RedHelenB]

It sounds as though your dp would have to sort things after her death - don't worry about money things now, it will all get sorted. Condolences to you all - it must be a terrible shock.

[AgentProvocateur]

If she doesn't have capacity, your DH can apply for financial guardianship to deal with her financial matters when she's alive. However, this can take time to go through the courts, so in not sure how appropriate it would be.

Could you contact MacMillan or similar for advice? I'm sure it's a tragically common situation. Take care

[Shellywelly1973]

Dp has an older sister but she has made it clear she doesn't want to get involved in any of the arrangements.

More then anything dp wants to make sure he does everything propley...

[mamadoc]

Sounds as though she is too ill to make an LPA or to make a will ( she probably won't have capacity). If she is lucid although physically frail a solicitor can come to the house and ultimately they will decide if she is able to understand what she is doing.
DH can apply to the court of protection to be appointed as her deputy but it takes months to come through and it seems it may be too late.
It may be that he will just have to wait to sort things out after she dies. Its Unlikely that banks etc will deal with him on her behalf without a formal mechanism but he could perhaps just inform any creditors of her situation if he is worried about debts accruing and they might be helpful.
Very sorry for your family.

[Shellywelly1973]

Thanks for all the responses. Mil is in hospital. She's almost blind & unable to retain any information so not able to make decisions about money etc.

I've spent the morning trying to sort out about her poor cats... Awful situation to be in. Its so frustrating, i can't even sort a couple of cats, i really dont know how we will manage all of this...

[Shellywelly1973]

Thanks!

[florencedombey]

In my experience, deputyship applications (and I do a lot of them) takes on average six months from start to end of process, so I'm not convinced it would be worth the hassle and expense, especially if there is no immediate need to access MIL's money.

If you do decide to go ahead and apply, the thing I would do first is ask your MIL's dr to complete the medical certificate COP3 (google it!) as the Court Of Protection won't even consider making an order without this. Drs don't always complete the certificate immediately (because they're busy looking after patients), so the process can be delayed before its even begun.

To be brutally honest though, if MIL is declining quickly, if you were a client of mine I'd advise you to do nothing now and sort the finances out after her death as (in purely legal terms) that'll be easier than applying for deputyship now.

[Tortoisegirl]

On the cats front the Cinnamon Trust might be able to help you.
www.cinnamon.org.uk/cinnamon-trust/
They step in to help rehome animals when someone dies or has a terminal illness. They were brilliant when my DG died.
I'm so sorry for what you are all going through.

[morethanpotatoprints]

Hello OP.

My dad was in hospital with a few weeks to live when he applied for me to be Power of Attorney, it was a while ago and if I remember correctly there were two types.
Unfortunately he passed away before it came through, but as executors both me and my sister sorted it out between us.
If she is of sound mind the solicitor will agree to her making a will and will visit in hospital if necessary.
I am so sorry to hear your news, I can remember the shock and crying when we found out too. Try not to worry as another poster said, it will sort out. Supporting your dh and being there for her at this time is the best you can do for her.

[Shellywelly1973]

Thankyou to everyone who has replied. I really appreciate it.

Florence, i will do as you have advised. I realised yesterday its the best way to deal with this difficult situation.

[Kundry]

This is going to sound horrible but I work in palliative care and deal with this situation a lot - I think the prognosis you have been given is far far too optimistic.

As others have said an LPA is out of the question now. She will also not be able to make a will. We never ever advise Court of Protection in this situation as the timescale is too long. Bank accounts etc do not need to be 'put in order' - this can all be done after death. From personal experience of doing this, banks, pension companies etc are very sympathetic when you do this and very helpful - many have 'bereavement departments' purely to do this.

I suggest your DP speak to the hospital palliative care team about his worries, what they think the prognosis may be and where they think she will be best looked after - if time is very short this may be a hospice and longer it may be a nursing home (this should be fully funded by the NHS so again no need for your DP to have anything to do with finances). If she hasn't been seen by the palliative care team he should be asking why not?

Sorry to be so direct and I hope your DP and family get the support you need.

[greenfolder]

Having dealt with similar, found most things ticked along-paid by direct debit. Had trouble with a few utilities- but got round this by making small payments myself and sorting out later.