Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Advice on getting maintenance whilst ex is working abroad

(33 Posts)
Caramelbutthorn Wed 10-Jul-13 17:03:40


I'm stuck and hope someone can offer some advice.

I need to obtain a CHILD MAINTENANCE ORDER but do not know how to do this myself.

My ex was making payments via the CSA but has recently moved far away. He is working for a foreign based company. There is therefore nothing that the Remo team or CSA can do to help me.

A document I saw online stated:

If you do not have a maintenance order or if you have a CSA assessment, you should contact your local magistrates’ court or family proceedings court about applying for maintenance abroad.

Have any of you had to try to get maintenance from an ex who has moved abroad? How did you do it?

I believe I need to obtain a child maintenance order but do not know how to do this and cannot work out which form I need to complete. As I cannot afford a solicitor I have to do this myself.

For a bit of background, I was NOT married to my babies father however I do have DNA test results to show he is the biological father.

Any advice would be appreciated,

Thank you xx

RedHelenB Wed 10-Jul-13 19:06:27

Who is he working for (Better chance of success if a large multinational co.) & which country? And how long is he going to be working abroad for?

RedHelenB Wed 10-Jul-13 19:07:12

Will he make any payments voluntarily at all - have you contacted him & asked?

Caramelbutthorn Wed 10-Jul-13 20:02:49


I have asked if he is going to voluntarily contribute but he won't confirm. He goes from saying maybe to saying he will if I do certain things to saying no.

There is a history of domestic violence. He was controlling and abusive throughout our relationship. He uses contributing as a way of maintaining that control. I feel by having an order I'm taking back some of that control and power. If he's away earning an awful lot and continuing to contribute towards his other two children then he should continue to contribute towards his youngest child too. I am not money grabbing nor a bitch. I'd just like what my son is owed.

Caramelbutthorn Wed 10-Jul-13 20:06:46

Hi Red, his company is a small one based in Asia. He's there until he can take no more and wants to come home. I expect he will be home to visit his family at Christmas.

ChocHobNob Wed 10-Jul-13 20:48:29

Why can't REMO do anything? Is he in a country or working for a company based in a country that they do not cover?

Caramelbutthorn Wed 10-Jul-13 20:57:24

The Remo thing applies according to where he lives. And he lives in a country that doesn't have a reciprocal agreement thing with the uk. I've checked several times. There's nothing I can do other than get an order in place.

RedHelenB Wed 10-Jul-13 23:23:39

TBH, I think you are on a hiding to nothing until he comes back to work in this country and you can involve the CSA. It isn't right & it isn't fair but i would just provide your bank details so he can set up a direct debit & leave him to it. Any money view as a bonus & concentrate on being a great parent to your little one.

babybarrister Wed 10-Jul-13 23:41:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Caramelbutthorn Thu 11-Jul-13 10:34:00

Thank you baby.
Does it matter that my ex and I were not married?
Do you know how I go about obtaining the court order? My local court don't have a clue sad( we can't work out which form I need and the citizens advice bureau are completely clueless. Thank you again x

Caramelbutthorn Thu 11-Jul-13 11:01:08

Hi again Red, I'm not in a position financially in which I can let him get away with paying nothing. I wish I was and didn't have to bother with him again. And I don't see why he should be allowed to walk away from his responsibilities without a fight.

babybarrister Thu 11-Jul-13 11:41:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Collaborate Thu 11-Jul-13 12:52:17

It's just an A1 form

If the court refuse to accept it, they're wrong, and you should quote Practice Direction 5A of the Family Procedure Rules 2010.

The fee payable went up on 1 July to £215.

Caramelbutthorn Thu 11-Jul-13 13:53:23

I love you baby and collaborate xxx

If I'm on benefits do I get a discount?

Thank you for everything x

Collaborate Thu 11-Jul-13 13:58:46

Have a look here. You may not have to pay any fees.

Caramelbutthorn Thu 11-Jul-13 22:15:51

Great, thank you x

Caramelbutthorn Thu 18-Jul-13 21:31:39

Hi again,

I received this email from court:

"Legally the Court can not make an order in absence of a party and must allow opportunity to the other party to make representations. It is possible for you to apply for an order when he is back within the jurisdiction of this court i.e. in the United Kingdom but he must remain here long enough for the Court Process to be completed. No action can be taken at this stage whilst he resides in xxxxxx. The United Kingdom has not reciprocal agreement with xxxxxx for such a process to take place."

Did you say they are wrong collaborate?

Thank you and sorry to ask x

Collaborate Fri 19-Jul-13 07:02:58

That's not right. Jurisdiction comes from the child living here. The father living abroad is irrelevant.

Of course certain enforcement remedies may not be available to you if he's abroad, but not all, if he has property here for example you could go for a charging order against it.

Caramelbutthorn Fri 19-Jul-13 10:29:54

Hi, thank you for replying.

He doesn't have property unfortunately. Or any other assets. Other than a rapidly increasing bank account

To make matters worse the CSA called me this morning and told me he had overpaid me and I'll need to repay this to him when he comes back to the uk. So he's got out of paying for months by demanding a DNA test then disappeared off abroad and refused to contribute sad(

Thank you for everything

Collaborate Fri 19-Jul-13 12:05:48

Demanding a DNA test merely defers enforcement. Doesn't stop liability.

babybarrister Fri 19-Jul-13 12:51:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

iheartdusty Fri 19-Jul-13 13:02:41

Did you write to the magistrates court or the county court? I may be wrong, but I think only the county court has jurisdiction in these circumstances.

You could ask the court to list for a short jurisdiction hearing, rather than being fobbed off with the letter. There is no reason not to serve an application and documents on a person who lives overseas, the Family Procedure Rules at Part 7 have a long list of countries and the additional time that has to be allowed for an application to be deemed to have been served. You may have to investigate the rules about service of documents that apply in the country where ex P is working, because those will usually dictate how service has to be effected.

if there is a bank account in the Uk, enforcement can be made against the bank account.

Collaborate Fri 19-Jul-13 13:03:58

REMO applications routinely go through the Family Proceedings Court (Magistrates)

iheartdusty Fri 19-Jul-13 14:07:14

yes but the order has to be made first, before REMO comes into it

LadyMaryQuiteContrary Fri 19-Jul-13 14:22:18

Hi smile

I'm going down the REMO route and have a hearing at the end of the month. From what I gather, if your ex still has ties to the UK, such as a house/bank account/pays UK tax or national insurance, then the CSA assessment applies. It's the same if the registered office of the company that he works for is in the UK, regardless of where he's based.

You have to go to the county court for the forms (to collect and to and to hand in) and there is no charge for you to do this. The county court will send these to the high court who will send these on to the country in question so that they can locate and serve. You'll then be given a date. As long as he's named on the birth certificate then there's no need for DNA evidence as parentage is assumed. There will be arrears if he's trying to do this.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now