Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Marriage broken, being forced out of home.

(17 Posts)
DistraughtMummy Sun 26-May-13 22:15:58

My husband walked out on me and our 5 month old baby boy. He had cheated on me and moved in with this other woman. I can't afford to pay the mortgage on my own so he is making me and his son move out so he and his new family can move in. Can he do this?
He can't afford to keep paying his half of the mortgage while running another house. I would only get child maintenance from him.
We are in negative equity so cannot sell. I am currently on maternity leave then will be working only 16 hours a week as from July. I am in such a mess, I don't want to have to leave my home because of something he did.

MrsFrederickWentworth Sun 26-May-13 22:20:09

Am not a lawyer but didn't want to read and run.

Get an appointment first with the citizens advice bureau and then with a solicitor. It sounds as though you will need advice on assets, maintenance and contact time.

Really sorry, must bf awful but hope your dc is lovely.

RedHelenB Mon 27-May-13 08:51:58

Yes, do see a lawyer. With your wage, working tax credits & maintenance (15% of net wage) might you be able to afford it? If not then you would eventually get repossessed anyway but not for a while. Certainly don't rush to move out, just say "I am meeting with a solicitor to discuss my position."

duchesse Mon 27-May-13 08:57:49

Agree with Helen and frederick. Do not move out unless you absolutely have to. Get advice, plenty of it. Get the locks changed while you're doing this, otherwise you may go out to the shops and discover that he's been in and done it.

duchesse Mon 27-May-13 08:59:05

Long-term, you may want to move out but I see no reason for you to do it because and when he says so. On the other hand if you are in negative equity, that could be a poisoned chalice anyway. CAB!

NatashaBee Mon 27-May-13 09:06:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

babybarrister Mon 27-May-13 09:33:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeliumHeart Mon 27-May-13 09:34:37

Please please please get to a solicitor or CAB as soon as possible, and agree with other advice - DO NOT leave the house until you're very sure that is the best option for you. Is the house in both your names? Seek advice regarding changing the locks - I have not been able to do this as our house is in my husband's name alone, although now that he has found somewhere else to live I plan to do exactly that.

I'm so sorry you're going through this; what a nightmare and how callous your H sounds to be leaving you so distraught and frightened. Please believe that the law is there to help you and look after you and your baby, but don't do anything drastic before seeking professional advice.

babybarrister Mon 27-May-13 09:35:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeliumHeart Mon 27-May-13 09:39:21

Whereabouts are you OP? Maybe somebody can give you a recommendation of a lawyer they know who might be able to give you a free initial consultation.

HeliumHeart Mon 27-May-13 09:42:57

When can you then, bb? I only ask as my H is finally moving out of the FMH this weekend, into a new rented house. The DJ at our injunction return hearing said that she thought the simplest solution once he had somewhere else to live was for me to change the locks. However, I don't have anything in writing to this effect but am desperate to change the locks as soon as he's gone!

duchesse Mon 27-May-13 10:06:07

Of course you can change the locks. If you lost yours keys in the street you might want to- what's the difference here? It will buy some time in which OP the will not be summarily kicked out on the street with her baby.

Xenia Mon 27-May-13 10:15:58

if he moved into the other woman's house which presumably she was paying for before he moved in why is he now running that home too. Does he just see women with no income? He might need to live on his parents' sofa whilst funding your current house and the child. It might also be worth your going back to full time work which i was lucky enough to be able to do when my children were babies and always helps financially and that way staying in the house particularly if you also get tax credits now he has gone might become more possible.

HeliumHeart Mon 27-May-13 11:08:30

Surely duchesse, because legally it's his house and where he currently lives. I was advised both by my H and my lawyer that if I changed the locks prematurely, he would simply call the police and be able to force entry. And then potentially change the locks the next time I was out of the house. And so on and so forth...

For further down the line, if you end up staying in the house, if he wants to get off the mortgage to buy with the OW, he will owe you half the negative equity (because you would be taking on his half of the negative equity).

The mortgage provider might insist that it is paid directly off the mortgage, but this will then reduce your mortgage payments.

(something similar has happened to my dSis - although at first the exBil thought he was "entitled" (his word) to cash for the time he had lived in the house and contributed to the mortgage. dSis's excellent solicitor nipped that one in the bud)

So get a good solicitor and go nowhere until you have had decent legal advice.

MOSagain Tue 28-May-13 18:01:13

agree with babybarrister who is an extremely qualified family barrister that I can vouch for. DO NOT move out, you will be making yourself intentionally homeless and will not get assistance with re-housing.

duchesse, she CANNOT legally change the locks, I'm not sure where you are getting your information from. If the property is in joint names then he is entitled to access to the property, no matter what he has done.

babybarrister Tue 28-May-13 18:18:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: