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What's the best action - Contact proceedings

(6 Posts)
squashedbanana Sat 11-May-13 10:44:36

This may be taken out of my hands as I think my ex will apply to court before I do, but should I wait for him to do that or should I apply for a non-molestation order against him due to the abusive emails he has been sending me and using our son as a means of getting to me?

When he applies to court can I respond with an application for a non-molestation order or should I apply for a non-molestation order and then he can apply for PR and contact afterwards which is what he is wanting to do

I don't know whether to act defensively or to be more assertive

squashedbanana Mon 13-May-13 15:50:53

a 'does anyone have any advice?' bump

anklebitersmum Mon 13-May-13 16:10:24

What's the history here squashed? Is there any reason that he shouldn't be afforded contact with his son?

If you genuinely need a non mol order then go to court to get one but don't use the legal system as a way to prevent your ex getting his parental rights. Not least as it gets messy and expensive fast.

squashedbanana Mon 13-May-13 16:29:29

he was/is abusive. I was advised not to allow unsupervised contact, he's saying there is no reason he should not be allowed unsupervised contact.

He has been malicious and acted vindictively towards me which I can evidence and has also been sending me abusive emails which I want to stop. He has also been using our son to get to me and to attempt to continue his control of me. I can evidence all of this.

I have never, ever refused contact only stipulated, as I have been advised by social services and my solicitor, that it should be supervised as he poses a risk to my son, aswell as being a physically and emotionally abusive risk he has also threatened to kidnap him. He ramped things up against me after I said I was no longer willing to supervise contact after he used contact to continue to abuse me.

The non-mol order is to get him to stop his abuse and harassment of me

anklebitersmum Mon 13-May-13 16:48:28

In that case I'd be seeking the courts protection for my son and myself if I were you. Be proactive, not reactive.

My honest advice would be to get yourself a good family law solicitor or at the very least have a conversation with one.

squashedbanana Mon 13-May-13 17:33:52

Proactive that's the word I was racking my brains for rather than assertive.

I have got an appointment for tomorrow with a solicitor who it turns out heads the family law department and I shall see what he says. He said he is going to see what he can do for me re legal aid but as my ex was never actually physically violent, he only threatened it and at that point I asked him to leave which is what lead to our break up, I am not sure I will be eligible so I am prepared to self represent if I have to

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