My aunty (I'll call her L) who had anxiety and OCD (had an on-off partner (K) but not married and no children) passed away on Thursday. One of her sister's (H) took it upon herself in the hospital to name herself NOK because she said L had mentioned it to her (L's mother outlives her but has dementia so cannot be NOK). H is basically self-appointed as NOK and signed all the paperwork at the hospital
A visit to L's bank to declare L's passing showed L had an ISA worth in the region of £8000 though this is yet to be confirmed (could be a little more or a less). Should be confirmed on Friday. H again signed in the bank as NOK with L's siblings' approval. H can be a bit of a shady character (and has shady children, one of whom used L's card when she was living to steal almost £900 from her). L had become friendly with H and her children again although the money was never repaid.
H is now stating that K (L's one and off partner who, tbh, is a bit shady himself) that L had told him that should anything happen to her then any money she had would go to H's children. Hard to imagine unless this was said way before H's daughter stole money from L. There were no other witnesses to L's comment to K and L did not make a will (nothing written down).
I hate to talk of money in these circumstances but it does not sit easy with me that L's youngest sister can appoint herself NOK (we only have her word that L said she should be her NOK) and now H is calling the shots as to what happens to any money left over after L's funeral, basically saying L wanted her four children (ages 28, 20, 15 and 7) to be the sole recipients (as I said, the only basis for this is that K told H that L had said this to him (with no other witnesses).
L has four siblings (H, M, H and R): two sisters and two brothers. I do not want a penny (as L's niece) but I do not feel it fair that H can self-appoint as NOK and make decisions in her children's favour based on hearsay alone. In the case of there being no will, and no other witnesses to what L supposedly said to K about what she wanted to happen to any assets, should not the money be split between L's siblings? Then if H wants to give some of her share to her children, that's her choice?
I am not at all saying it's the case here but how, for example, does the law protect against collusion (eg H gets K to say L said her children were to be sole recipients in return for a cut??)
Does anyone know where the law stands on this issue? Haven't really got time to see a solicitor or consult CAB, and don't really want to go that route. In the end, I have lost a beloved aunt and if H wants to be greedy and grasping (not sure how she'd be responding if K had told her L had said any monies should go to one of L's other sibling's children!) then part of me feels, let her! On her conscience be it!
But it riles that one of H's children literally stole from her and never paid it back should get money, and it should not be H's place as self-appointed NOK to argue her children should get everything based on hearsay, basically...
L had siblings so unless she'd specifically stated her wishes in a will, this outcome does not seem fair.
Any one help or advise? Anyone know where the law stands on this? Just want to be informed...
Thanks!
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Can anyone help? Problem around loved one dying intestate and tricky NOK situation... Thanks
11 replies
LeoandBoosmum · 09/04/2013 19:34
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