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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Re divorce and contact.

(9 Posts)
AttillaTheMum Thu 01-Nov-12 23:16:21

I know I'm not. I am looking more for advice. A very short back story... STBXH was abusive but I never went to the police - I know-. Since leaving I have old him he can have supervised visitation only as the lat few times he has seen the children he has lost his temper in front of them. In addition to this his dad is an unsavoury character for many reasons. We always agreed the children would not see his dad but since splitting up he is pushing for contact with his dad and the children.

Today I received the court papers where his family hVe given statements. They are lies, they put that I am suicidal, violent and neglect the children. I am in absolute shock an donor know what to do.

I cannot afford a solicitor and do not qualify for legal aid

AttillaTheMum Thu 01-Nov-12 23:17:08

Don't not donor! Sorry!

ZillionChocolate Thu 01-Nov-12 23:20:35

Post in legal.

lovebunny Fri 02-Nov-12 00:23:15

stay calm. post in legal. start writing down anything you can remember about his behaviour, with particular examples, and your concerns about him and his dad.

whois Fri 02-Nov-12 07:53:32

You need a solicitor really but defo make a diary f all the abusive times you can remember

BumpInTheNightFuglies Fri 02-Nov-12 08:30:34

Agree with other posters. Also keep any text messages you receive or send, write down phone conversations etc. What papers have you actually received? Do you have to go to court? You really need representation and legal advice.

Who has been supervising contact? Was this your decision or backed up by Social Services? They may also be able to help you.

Also could you consult CAFCASS?

financialwizard Fri 02-Nov-12 08:42:46

Post in legal.

CAFCASS will get involved at the initial hearing. Do not worry (I know it is easy for me to say). I have been there and it is one of the most stressful times of my life. The judge we had saw right through my exh when we went through a similar thing.

If you need to rant feel free to PM me any time, but please please at least get a free 30 minutes with a solicitor. It may well save your sanity.

addictedtolatte Fri 02-Nov-12 08:44:49

dont panic he has to prove all these things and as there not true he will make himself look silly. my ex tried all this on me he even threw my pnd from 1st child in the mix. bad move by him. i had to undergo all the checks but come back with a glowing report which made him look very silly. i agree you really need a solicitor

WhatsTheBuzz Fri 02-Nov-12 13:42:25

You could do with a statement from someone independent perhaps, like HV or GP though really, it is HIS job to provide evidence to support what he's saying. What his family says hardly matters as they have a personal interest. As for pushing for contact with his dad, wtf? Nothing to do with his dad. If no-one other than your XH and his family are raising concerns then I would hope you don't have anything to worry about. Besides, a Judge won't want to hear mud-slinging and him slagging you off, it just proves that he's not interested in having an amicable relationship with you for DC's sake.

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