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collaborate, Tyr, STWID, BabyB....

(8 Posts)
pinguthepenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 15:58:28

Hi there

Sorry to shout you out like this! and I hope you don't mind. I've seen you giving similar advice on these issues and collaborate - you advised me on an earlier thread this week.

My ex has applied for a shared residency order AND a contact order at the same time, asking the court to grant him access every weekend from fri-mon

He currently has one mid week overnight, one weekend night, plus one full weekend ( so basically we share weekends right down the middle). His court application states that his reasons for the change in contact is because the driving is a burden ( I moved 9.9 miles away from prev address) and the effect on dd is that she is extremely tired. He also attacks my parenting of dd and says I frustrate contact. He has no evidence of this.

Obviously I am going to fight the contact order, as every weekend just seems awful to me. However, I am unsure about the shared residency. I am seeing my sol tomorrow night but I have so much going round in my head.

My sol suggested on on phone that I should fight the shared residency order as there is just no need for it. Evidence seems to suggest he would be granted it anyway. What do you think?

Collaborate Thu 18-Oct-12 16:06:14

It's mainly semantics, although it is sometimes used when the resident parent seems to think they can rule the roost. Shared residence can represent a rebalancing of power.

Also anyone in whose favour a residence order is made can take the child abroad for up to 28 days without the consent of the other parent (in other words when either of you have a holiday you can take the child abroad).

pinguthepenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 16:27:24

thanks for the reply. His court application is full of lies about how I take her out the country without notice or consent. I guess then, that at least a shared residency order would mean that I dont have to face these kind of personal attacts?

So do you recommend not fighting that, and dealing only with the contact issue?

Collaborate Thu 18-Oct-12 16:34:34

You should ask your solicitor that really. They know maore about you and your case.

pinguthepenguin Thu 18-Oct-12 16:39:05

Thanks, I just dont want to be dragged through the courts fighting something which will be handed out anyway. My biggest is the contact - do you think he will def not be awarded every single weekend?

babybarrister Sat 20-Oct-12 07:42:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Attilathehun Sat 20-Oct-12 07:51:42

'and says I frustrate contact. He has no evidence of this.'
'Obviously I am going to fight the contact order'

In his eyes perhaps you do?

pinguthepenguin Sat 20-Oct-12 09:45:31


Don't you have to have evidence to make such statements? Isn't it a bit like me saying ' he's a crap father? Wouldn't I have to substantiate that?

Does the court process operate on how people 'see it through their eyes'? a genuine question

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