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Cafcass psychiatric assessment help please

(6 Posts)
Magnac Wed 22-Aug-12 11:24:51

I've been reading the forum and relieved to find so many helpful people with experience in these things.

I finally got out of DV relationship last year. Ex applied for contact with our 2 year old although he was never involved or interested before. He knows I have had help for depression in the past and always told me if I left him he would get custody for mental health reasons. He has been attacking on that basis ever since his application.

There's no evidence that it is an issue atall and I've been open about my past. But the court and now cafcass are ignoring all dv allegations by me and keep bringing up ex's mental health allegations.

Now psychiatric assessments of us both have been ordered.

This worries me because ex has managed to fool everyone with his pretence. He tells them all how reasonable he has been and paints a picture of a knight in shining armor. And invents stories about me making me sound nuts. Nothing has been investigated but every statement by him is pages long with more stories.

I'm worried that the court seems to be ready to believe the mental health issues and seems unable to see through ex's lies. What effect will a psych assessment have? Will it be able to see through ex or will it just reinforce ex's accusations about me?

Ex seems happy with this legal process, dropping 'hand grenades' from a distance and lying, the whole thing seems like a continuation of his dv towards me. If anyone has experience of this sort of thing I would appreciate and support or comments you can offer for dealing with it or what I might expect.

Kladdkaka Wed 22-Aug-12 13:04:05

It's horrible when you are going through it. You begin to doubt everything you know to be true. But the courts have heard it all before. Every trick your ex partner has up his sleeve is old news to them. But they still have to follow through with things like the psych assessment. Be honest and open with them and they will see him for what he is. Hard though it is, try not to worry.

Magnac Wed 22-Aug-12 13:16:29

Thanks, but ex is a solicitor and seems to have everyone eating out of his hand. He knows the ropes well and tells everyone what he thinks they want to hear, everyone seems to be taking him on face value and it seems they don't want to believe that one of their own might be a wolf in sheeps clothing.

cestlavielife Thu 23-Aug-12 19:51:01

depression per se is not a barrier to having residence /shared residence at all - unless you have for example had very severe aggressive or suicidal episodes and been a danger to you or your child or been completely unable to look after self or child (and it not being pnd) and have not sought treatment for it.

if you are pursuing treatment for any mh issues and can function well then it should not be an issue - and you can simply put all the info forward when you have your assessment

Hanah40 Fri 12-Oct-12 15:41:50

Abusive exes are very good at gas-lighting like this. Fortunately a good psychiatrist can recognise a malignant narcissist at a thousand paces.

avenueone Fri 12-Oct-12 21:59:42

It sounds like your ex is carrying out `institutional grooming' . Abusers are usually very capable of this -esp, if they were very different in public with you than behind closed doors - it may be worth explaining his ability to do this to your CAFCASS reporter but they may already suspect it hence the assessment on both of you. You have nothing to worry about and I am sure you will come across child centred and just yourself.

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