DH and BIL inherited a house, DH wants to sell BIL doesn't...help

[F0rgetMeNot]

My DH and his brother have inherited their late Grandad's house. The will states (DH is named as the executor of the will) that the house be sold and split, with a right to postpone sale if all parties agree. He has not got a solicitor involved yet and has applied for probate on his own, which is going through.

DH's Brother is living in the house and has done for 6 years with their Grandad. He doesn't want to sell, but is in no position to buy DH out of his half, or in fact to keep the house on or pay the bills as he doesn't work but he is making things impossible to move forward with any kind of sale, does anyone have any advice on how this can be resolved?

[catinboots]

Sounds like a nightmare. Sorry no real advice for you.

Would it be possible to agree to defer the sale for a specified time (ie 12 months), to enable BIL to get himself sorted re work and somewhere to live???

[Wowserz129]

Very tricky situation. However the BIL could easily live in the house until its sold and then he will have plently money to rent with his half?

[F0rgetMeNot]

Yes they agreed that he could live there a few months, but he has no income and has never held down a job. He doesn't WANT to work, sorry I should have put a bit of history with the first post but I was hoping there was a simple answer if its just a case of one person wanting to sell and the other not.

He basically wants to live in the property but not pay bills, he is refusing to look for a job, refusing to budge from the house, refusing to help clear out belongings, trying his best to stop DH from clearing anything, he has been offered a place to stay rent free while everything is sorted and refused that, and also will not go down the route of claiming any benefits. It seems like stalemate between them and DH is so sad that this seems to be turning into a money war that he has even thought of just walking away from the house and letting his brother get on with it.

[IslaValargeone]

If the will says a right to postpone sale if all parties agree then it would appear your dh has the advantage so to speak.
You try and sell the property and then the brother has his half of the money to buy a flat or whatever?
Is there some history which makes him want to be obstructive?

[DoIgetastickerforthat]

I have no legal knowledge in this area whatsoever but I would be concerned about your DH just walking away because as joint owner wouldn't he be liable for unpaid bills (council tax, utility's, property maintenance) regardless of not living there? It could end up a very costly inheritance.

Is your BIL just a lazy fecking freeloader or do you think there are mental health issues? I would get some legal advice. If the will states
that the house is to be sold then that should give your DH a good foothold to go ahead regardless of BIL's wishes.

Good luck OP, it sounds like a nightmare.

[F0rgetMeNot]

Thanks, brief history is above, I should have put it OP sorry.

[F0rgetMeNot]

So he can't legally stop the sale just because he doesn't want to. DH is being very fair and wants him to have his portion, and has given him some cash out of his own pocket to help him out until the sale, but it has been thrown back in our faces for no other reason really than that he doesn't want to move on.

[TheSurgeonsMate]

In Scotland, the easy answer is that the person who wants to sell trumps the person who doesn't want to sell.

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

So who is your BIL proposing pay the bills on the house while he lives there?

Your DH needs to see a solicitor and get some advice, I am pretty sure he could force a sale due to the terms in the will. Seems that his Grandad was afraid of this happening, hence the stipulation that ALL parties would have to agree to a deferred sale.

[F0rgetMeNot]

doigetastickerforthat- thanks you make a very good point about being liable for bills if unpaid we didn't think of that. We are all novices in all of this financial stuff.
You also hit the nail on the head with the freeloading. He has always been a freeloader, and I suspect mental health problems also, all of which denied by BIL. It is a nightmare and totally tarring what should be a time of remembering the lovely Grandparents they had.

[wannabedomesticgoddess]

Im not qualified but to my understanding, if the will is worded exactly as you have put in your OP then the house has to be sold.

I fear that you are going to have to evict BIL. Even if DH had no share in the property as executor of the will he is obligated to ensure the will is carried out.

If BIL doesnt work and wont claim benefits then what is he living on? Who is he expecting to pay his bills?

Its a difficult situation as Im sure your DH doesnt want to be horrible to his brother. But his brother isnt exactly being amenable right now. I would have little sympathy for him.

My advice would be consult a solicitor and begin proceedings to evict him.

[F0rgetMeNot]

Thanks all. Looks like we'll be getting some legal advice then. I think we knew we would, but needed to hear it from others too I think. Its so hard with it being family.

His Grandad did know this would happen unfortunately despite loving them both the same he knew he could trust DH as the 'sensible one'

[DoIgetastickerforthat]

Yes and your DH sounds like a really decent chap and he mustn't feel that he is being mercenary or money grabbing. His Grandad entrusted him with carrying out his wishes and he has a moral and legal duty to do so.

Whether or not BIL's behavior is due to fecklessness or illness, it would be of no benefit to anybody if your DH isn't proactive about sorting this. He clearly isn't in a rational frame of mind (how the hell is he proposing to feed and clothe himself with NO income??!) and is probably very fearful of change and quite likely, incapable of looking after himself as it sounds like the Grandad has been looking after him, but life has changed. His Grandad has gone and he's going to have to move forward and your DH would be being a far better brother if he ensures that he has some sort of sustainable living arrangement, at least for the time being, (my DH has a brother with severe mental health issues, we financially support him and will probably have to for the rest of his/our lives - family's are messy entity's!).

Oh, and it's also fine for him to want his share of the money too. Even half the profits of a modest house would be a welcome boost to any household income - his Grandad wanted him to have that money, he should have it.

[CeCeMazycktowinparaolympicgold]

He sounds like he doesn't want anything to change. Will there be enough money for him to buy a smaller house/flat once the house is sold? Perhaps you could help him with this?

[F0rgetMeNot]

Just realised I haven't answered all questions.

At the moment he is living on the money DH has given him (the money wasn't thrown back in our faces, he took that!) Which should last him a couple of months, previous to that he had the rest of his Grandad's pension for that month and previous to that his Grandad was keeping him financially.

[Northernlurker]

Your bil was living off his grandfather and now expects to stay in the house, depriving your dh of his inheritance and with no means to support himself? Wow he really believes in the money fairy doesn't he? Evict him.

You could let him stay for years and give him every penny you have and he still won't be happy because people like that just aren't. E V I C T him and start planning what you'll do with the inheritance.

[F0rgetMeNot]

Yes, the house was owned outright and so he would have enough for a good deposit on his own home if he got a job with enough left over to learn to drive and buy a (used)car. He has been offered a room at their Mum's house for free while he looks for a job and while DH sorts the house. Maybe he will take this opportunity when he comes to terms with it, I don't know, although from past form he I fear he will not.

[Musomathsci]

You really do need to get him out, because you will have no chance of selling if he is still there.
Will he look after the house? Sounds like he might let it go to rack and ruin just to spite you.

[Viviennemary]

I think this is going to be a very tricky situation if your brother tries to be difficult about moving out. Not sure of the exact legal situation. So see a solicitor as soon as possible. It doesn't sound as if it's going to be resolved in an amicable way by agreement. I suppose it is difficult for your BIL as it's his home. But he's not exactly going to be homeless as I've just seen your MIL has offered him a room. Hope it gets sorted out soon.

[F0rgetMeNot]

How do we evict him though if its his house too? The house will be sold at auction once DH has probate sorted (well that WAS the original plan anyway)

Thankyou guys for all your advice and support. Its good to get it all out as its not something we have felt able to really talk about in depth to anyone but eachother. I'm going to show DH this thread now too as I think it will give him a moral boost as well as some much needed advice.

[JUbilympiX]

You must engage a solicitor - this is not going to be easy, and getting probate is not actually that straight forward.

The sale will have to take place at some point, and perhaps a letter from a solicitor will make this more of a reality to your BIL.

So sorry that this is making a difficult time harder.

[Tansie]

It's been my 'fear' that my financially incontinent DB (52) will screw up sufficiently to need to move back in with our mum. She doesn't want it but says 'I'd never see you homeless'. It wouldn't worry DB one bit, the ignomy of having financially so failed to be 'an adult' that he needs to fall back on 'going home to mother' (he was 36 when he left!). Mum's will leaves 2/5 of everything to him, 2/5 to me and 1/5 to 'any GCs' (whom I have, both of 'em!). I hope that, should he move back in, mum won't be coerced into changing her Will, but she still, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, sees DB as being 'unlucky' rather than 'feckless'!

DH (51 now) and his DB (59) were each given 50% of their last parent's estate, 10 years ago. DB never left home (he was unnaturally close to his parents, his mum in particular...) and has become very well off, having never paid rent or supported any one else. To my continuing (but silent!) irritation, DH decided that his DB's half should be the huge house ('We can't throw DB out!'), with pool and all the furniture, and the family car (in Oz); his own (DH's 'share') would be his father's pension fund. DB's 'half' is currently worth about £500,000. DH's 'half' pays him £400 p.a.

The house is far too big for DB on his own (and he moans about that all the time, having to mow half an acre, pay for a cleaner etc) so he's now talking about selling it. Says it's ridiculously big and he rattles around it all by himself....

I personally really believe DH should have demanded half the house, with a 2 year get-out to his DB. Not only would it have ensured some parity- we are the only ones with DC and uni fees ahead, DB is completely single! Like my DB, actually, only much better off - it would have forced DB to 'get on with his life'.

So I am entirely with you!