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My husband has left us, what are my rights?

(9 Posts)
JustCarefulMum Sat 30-Jul-11 18:08:05

Hi,
We are an EU citizen who came to UK a year ago in exercising a treaty right to reside in UK. Today just a month before the beginning of the academic year, my husband told me that he wanted to pursue his studies at the University (year two Architectural Engineering) full time by taking loans. I told him I?m not proponent for the idea showing him how it is silly idea to go back to University while we have now 5 children the youngest one is only 5 months and the rest are tow twins only two years old with another boy and girls (9 and 7 years old). He was determined, he left us and disappeared. I?m now really devastated I don?t know what to do and how to survive with my children? He was working part-time and doing everything for the house. I was only taking care of children in the house, I don?t drive. I worked only one month as part-time since we came to this Country. He is the one who was receiving the Benefits (HB, CTB, CB and WTC) but my name is added on all paperwork?s and official documents. Our rent is 2500£ pcm. Now when I asked my neighbors some of them told me that I might not be entitled to any benefits because I didn?t work enough which means I haven?t tax contributions also the fact that I haven?t the ILR (Indefinite Leave to Remain) I may not be qualified for any Public Fund even when I have an EU status and having a child born in here.!!
I tried to call my ?husband? but apparently he has changed his contact number, we have no families or relatives in UK so I don?t really know what to do and where to go if we don?t pay the rent for the next due?
I beg anyone reads this to advice me what to do and where to go especially if there are among you lawyers or some working in the local authorities to help me by giving me advices and guidance over my ?rights? in the actual situation and I?ll be really grateful. Thanks to all.

GypsyMoth Sat 30-Jul-11 18:31:05

Where are you from? Perhaps family back there would help you get back to them?but if your DH has gone, then he should nit be claiming those benefits still, so you need to speak to relevant departments and get them transferred to you, I think.

JustCarefulMum Sat 30-Jul-11 18:44:37

Thanks "ILoveTIFFANY" for your advice, but a neighbor has told me as long as I'm not working and without ILR I'll not be eligible for receiving or transfering the benefits to my name.??

RandomMess Sat 30-Jul-11 18:46:53

You need to go to the citizens advice bureau, I have no idea if you are entitled to claim benefits or not but they will.

TheMagnificentBathykolpian Sat 30-Jul-11 18:50:08

I agree with randomness, you need to go to the CAB, where they can talk to you at length, ask you everything they need to know and tell you what the situation is. It's not a good idea to rely on a message board for information such as this. You need professional input.

QuintessentialShadow Sat 30-Jul-11 18:51:42

I am sorry to hear your husband has left.
Where does he get funding to leave his job and study at university?

If you have only been in the Uk for a year, and you dont work, maybe going home to your friends and family would be better for you?

I think you will have to find a job if you stay. Most people have to work, and especially if they have 5 children to feed it is a luxury for a wife to stay at home and not work, even with a husband.

JustCarefulMum Sat 30-Jul-11 19:03:20

I’m sorry most of you are telling me to go back home or to friends, family etc.. I’m from France and I have no family there, as we don’t have house or property over there and have no money no more oh my God...!!! why he is doing this to me....!

TheMagnificentBathykolpian Sat 30-Jul-11 19:09:26

2 people out of the 4 replies have wondered if returning home might be better for you.

The other 2 have suggested proper, professional advice. From the citizens advice bureau.

wailing and panicking, while understandable, will not sort out your problem. You need to go to the CAB.

PeppaIsBack Tue 02-Aug-11 11:40:05

JustCarefulMum OK I can answer some of your questions, albeit not all of them.

If you are from France, you won't have any problem re tax credit etc.. You will get the same than any other UK citizen because you are from an EU country. Have you registered yourself with the tax office? They will give you a tax refrence number (but not starting with TN which is a temproray number for people working tmeporary in the UK). Have a look at your wage slip for the little bit you've worked here. Contact the Citizen Advice Bureau, they will be able to guide you and give you all the contact details of the relevant agencies.

Also I would take advice on whether you can go back to France as your H is still leaving in the UK. It could be seen as 'kidnapping' iyswim. So do take some advice on that one!

You really need to contact CAB etc... If he is planning to do his studies by taking a loan, I can't see how he will manage that and pay your rent. So you need to protect yourself and contact the housing office NOW. Put your name down so your can get a council flat asap (It's the same than the HLM in France - Rent would be paid in full) so that you know you have a roof over your & your dcs heads.
NB : if your H has his name of the tenancy agreement, he is the one liable for the payment. However, I am not sure whther it is not possible for the owner to kick you of the flat/home.
I would also get in touch with a sollicitor re signing some sort of separation agreement so that you are not liable to any loans he could take until you are able to sort something out (I am thinking here of his University dream amongst oher thing). Otherwise, you might end up having to pay for that too!

Could I also advice you go onto the 'Relationship threads'. There are a lot very wise women there and they would be able to support you/give advice on your relationship itself. It's here

HTH

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