help, help please - husband terminally ill needs access to money in trust

[OwlsEverywhere]

Hi, can anyone advise on what to do next, please?

When making our wills the legal person we saw implied that my husband could get access to money from the sale of his parental home. More specifically, the house was left to him and his brother when his father died, with some kind of proviso that their mother (his ex or estranged wife at the time of his death) could live there/have somewhere to live (I don't know precisely what).

She moved into an old folks home, and the house was sold. However, solicitors could not make up their mind about the status of the proceeds, so advised that the money should be invested, the interest used towards fees for the home, and the sons to have the capital when their mother had no need of it. I think that this was to satisfy Social Services who one day may have to pick up the bills for thier mother's care. This was 2 years ago.

My husband is now terminally ill, which we discovered 3 months ago; we have 2 children (7yrs and 6mths). He is fretting terribly about money - being made homeless because we can't pay the mortgage etc - and is desperately trying to get back to work to try to preserve access to his death in service payment/is stressed about running out of sick leave and being dismissed etc etc. He hasn't very long to live; tragically only months, and I can't bear to see him so worried when he should be enjoying his final weeks.
(Brain tumours accentuate obsessions, according to the counsellor I've met, and he is making all our lives a misery nagging me and the 7 yr old about what we spend, so we can't 'enjoy' him either. Nor can I provide her with treats to make her life more tolerable - well I do but he rants at me).

So back to my original question. Can we get access to the money left by his father, and if so, how? When we made our wills the legal person for the solicitors said that terminal illness is some kind of special condition.

Is there a special terminology that I need to understand? Are there any procedures that I ought to know about?

Many thanks to anyone who can open, or even lock, this door for us. It would make a big difference to how we go on in the short time we have left as a family.

[CMOTdibbler]

You need to see a solicitor and talk to them about it - they can the apply to the trustees for a variation

[MavisEnderby]

Hi there xxI cannot advise over house position but wonder if your dh has a Macmillan nurse at all???They should be able to give advice re financial matters and maybe put you in touch with someone who is an expert int hese areas.Also your dh should qualify for financial help (ds 1500 form,your Mc nurse should be able to complete one for you),does he get DLA also???I am sure if you rang Mcmillan helpline they also may be able to advise.It is freephone no.Another place may also be CAB they offer free dfinancial advice.Could you go back to your solicitor,many do an initial half hour free consult.

//Macmillan.org.uk

//Citizensadvice.org.uk

I am so sorry you are in this situation x

[OwlsEverywhere]

Oh, thanks for the replies. I have to say that cancer care is amazing. We have DLA, thanks to CAB help.

So, perhaps we go back to the solicitor now to apply for a variation. Though the trustee is the other brother. I think he's worried about being saddled with the admin for his mother, so I'm not sure if he'll be so sympathetic. We'll have a go!

[LoveBeingAbleToNamechange]

Please post in employment issues, he should not be dragging himself to work like that.

I'm so sorry about your dh, my dad died last year and ge went into over drive to make everything was in order for my mum before he passed away.

[OwlsEverywhere]

So my husband can discuss this with his brother first - what are the criteria for a variation- or is there a website that I can consult?