Splitting up - how do finances get split?

[mostlyhappy]

My Partner and I are not married and are thinking of splitting up. We have two children (baby and two year old). If we split up will he be entitled to half the house? I bought it six years ago when I was on my own, and it has about £100k equity in it. The mortgage is in my name, he has just paid a contribution towards mortgage and bills for last four years. He moved in about five years ago.

Our outgoings are approx £900 monthly mortgage and bills and £1400 nursery fees (obviously food, etc is on top of that). I'm sure I will need to pay all the mortgage and bills in future myself if we separate but will I legally be able to expect him to pay half the nursery fees? He earns less than me (I earn approx £30k and he earns £20k) but my salary should just about cover the bills, mortgage and half nursery fees, but not other stuff.

I do have savings of approx £33k (from vol redundancy and own savings from years ago). Will he be legally entitled to some of this?

I know I must sound really grabbing seeing as I earn more than him and have savings but if I am alone, I can see that the savings will be needed for normal living and possibly reducing the mortgage to make it less scary. I am really worried that I may have to sell the home that I love and that the children are settled in.

[Wamster]

I think the first thing to remember here is that because you are not married you will not be treated like a divorcing couple.
I can see that if he can demonstrate that he has paid contributions to mortgage he may be entitled to share of home. If he had NOT, I would feel confident that he would get nothing as regards the home. Living with somebody in a relationship is not enough to get your hands on their money if you've contributed nothing. Marriage is another ball game altogether...

I do not think, however, that he has absolutely no claim on any other assets you may have that he has NOT contributed to and this includes your savings.

I am confident that your savings are yours and yours alone.

[Wamster]

Sorry, a typo, that should be: I do think, however, that he has absolutely no claim on any other assets you may have that he has NOT contributed to and this includes your savings.

[HauntedLittleLunatic]

If your savings are in your own name he can't touch them.

Not sure about the house, he has contributed to it but as his name isn't on it that may affect things.

[Portofino]

Surely (on a practical note) if you split he won't be able to afford to give you 700 per month for nursery fees on his salary....?

[perfectstorm]

If you're a lone parent without his earnings, and your children are in childcare because you work, I think you'd be under the tax credits threshold. That might resolve the nursery fees issue. www.entitledto.co.uk

He can't possibly give you £700 a month out of his salary, I don't think. It'd be half his taxed earnings - how on earth could he afford to live? He'll have to rent a new place to live and pay to run it, after all, and it ideally will be big enough that he can have the kids in their own room when it's his time with them. It isn't a fair ask, given you have a substantially better position (though I accept the kids will be costly). But I hope you will be in receipt of child tax credits for childcare so not such a huge issue.

One of the legal peeps can tell you what sort of a claim his mortgage payments would give him. You might do well to get a free session with a solicitor to get some idea of how much to offer in settlement.

[sneezecakesmum]

Is the house in your name only? If he is named on the mortgage that puts you in a difficult position regarding his claim on part of the house. To be honest I am not really sure he has any significant claim at all on your home if he is not named on the mortgage, as his contributions could be considered informal rent and expenses. He would after all have had to pay to rent somewhere else, just because it was not formalised does not mean its not rent.

[gillybean2]

He'll have to pay you maintenancce is the dc are his.
This is 15% if net income for 1 dc, 20% for 2 dc.

It gets reduced if he has them stay overnight with him during the week.
www2.dwp.gov.uk/csa/v2/en/calculate-maintenance.asp

You'd have to pay the nursery from that, but you may also get WTC & CTC and help towards child care costs as a lone parent.
www.turn2us.org.uk/benefits_search.aspx

Can't help with the house sorry. But a friend of mine was left with nothing (and no home) when she and her partner split up even though he had a house she had no claim on it.

Try the CAB for more specific advice?

[Theyremybiscuits]

I don't think he is entitled to anything to do with the house if it is in your name only and you are not married.

Ditto savings etc.

He will need to pay you maintenance etc.

Go to a solicitor asap! x

[Wellnerfermind]

I reckon on 20K he'd have to pay £200 a month child support.

[Collaborate]

It takes a hell of a lot to get an interest in someone else's house in the situation you describe. Think he'll get nothing.

[mostlyhappy]

Thank you to everyone for your information and advice. It's really helpful to hear all this. I don't want to take money from him that he can't afford and hope we can be as amicable and fair to each other as possible. I will do 'the right thing' regarding money etc. I just panic that I may lose the house and security for me and the kids. It's so unnerving because he can be quite vindictive when he's angry and I need to know where I stand. Thanks for all your help.