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Ex abroad no longer pays maintenance... Should I involve REMO now money is so tight at home?

(28 Posts)
wabbit Wed 16-Mar-11 22:12:42

I guess I'm just feeling my way on this - I was so happy when I heard that my EX ds's father had emigrated to NZ and got married about 2.5 years ago.

I just thought that he'd be far enough away not to bother us hmm And it explained the reason why the £500 pcm that the CSA were making him provide for us stoppedshock

Since this though my current partner of 3.3 years has become a Student and is taking his Masters in Product Design after years and years of working in Brake development for a British car company which almost killed him due to the tedium. He's not been in engineering for nearly 3 years now.

My 20k per year does not cover our costs, I'm studying as well as working and we've reached a financial crisis.

To the point that in order for us to survive my mind keeps returning to the maintenance that exP has not paid and will not without my instigating a court order.

Part of me thinks we're well rid of a man unable to tell the truth, eager to run away from his mistakes and manipulative... ds does not need his values and is adored by my partner who in all but name and genetics is his daddy.

Would making him pay - and being a policeman I don't think he'd be able to get away with not paying - make him want 'a piece' of our lovely boy? How could I stay in control of his access to ds if it came to that?

I don't like having to even think about it but the shit's really hitting the fan financially here.

Resolution Thu 17-Mar-11 00:29:01

You must apply to court straight away. CSA stopped the moment he emigrated (assuming he doesn't work for a UK employer). There are therefore no arrears. Get your maintenance order over here, then use the REMO procedure to enforce in NZ.

wabbit Sun 20-Mar-11 09:41:09

So you don't think my dilemma of making a financial demand of a man who could potentially have an unsettling and negative impact on DS is a dilemma at all?

He's had absolutely no contact with DS since our initial CSA application went through nearly 4 years ago - he's really only paid about a year in the maintenance - and there were many lies and attempts to sidestep that.

He's not a man who would happily pay for anything without feeling as though he was 'getting something out of it' for himself

But then he's also at liberty to demand to be part of ds's life at any moment with or without supporting him.

He's a police officer and has transferred to the Auckland Criminal Investigation Unit so has no way of getting away without paying once the ball gets rolling.

Being on the other side of the world does make making himself a nuisance less possible!!

wabbit Sun 20-Mar-11 12:19:51

thanks for replying though Resolution - I know other peoples neurotic ideas must be frustrating if you can see clearly without the emotional aspect of maintenance matters looming over you.

How do I apply to the courts?

wabbit Sun 20-Mar-11 14:05:27

bump smile

Resolution Sun 20-Mar-11 15:33:01

Well, your arrears of CSA maintenance can still be enforced. Ask the CSA to get a liability order in the mags then you can enforce it through the NZ courts. For ongoing maintenance you need to apply once more through the uk courts (ideally within the old divorce proceedings). Then after that you hire a NZ solicitor to register and enforce it for you.

wabbit Sun 20-Mar-11 17:28:18

Thanks Resolution - I'll ask my family law solicitor who dealt with our (failed) access arrangements and who initially insisted that the CSA dealt with our maintenance to apply for a court order as there has never been a court order issued for maintenance.

It sounds expensive though, as I earn now, will I be eligible for legal aid?

Resolution Sun 20-Mar-11 17:38:27

Google LSC eligibility calculator. But if he thought you should stay with the CSA even after he went to NZ are you sure you should be using him again?

wabbit Sun 20-Mar-11 21:06:49

Thank you so much for your help

Collaborate Mon 21-Mar-11 00:04:36

Second thought - resolution here. CSA will have to have dealt with maintenance in the first instance in the absence of an agreement that a court order would be made, so it will have been right for your solicitor to insist on CSA (unless it was already known that he was in NZ or about to go there).

wabbit Mon 21-Mar-11 22:25:20

Hmm - CSA immediately withdrew their services when I told them ExP had gone to New Zealand. Prior to that, ExP had requested a hold be placed on his payments as he was taking a career break. Since then I've not attempted to have payments reinstated because of the overwhelming sense of being well rid of him.

It's just now that money doesn't go as far and we (my family - new parter, ds and my daughter) have been in a prolonged period in which we have more outgoings than I earn (as Dp is a student) that I can't afford not to insist that my ExP fulfils his obligation to pay maintenance.

My solicitor, when I first started seeing her, insisted that I did not accept ExP's evaluation of how much he should be paying in maintenance per month - the figure he was willing to pay was £120, she insisted I involve the CSA who calculated he was obliged to pay me and my son just less than £500 per month - which he did until he contacted the CSA informing them of his 'career break' which in actual fact turned out to be him emigrating to NZ to marry a previous girlfriend.

Hope this solves any confusion I've lead you into blush

Collaborate Mon 21-Mar-11 23:59:02

No problem.

Just get your order from the court and then enforce it through REMO (I haven't checked that you can enforce it in NZ but I'd be surprised if that weren't the case).

StewieGriffinsMom Tue 22-Mar-11 08:48:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wabbit Tue 22-Mar-11 23:42:36

Thank you SGM smile I was checking on the REMO site and it had NZ on it's list of participating countries - I have no idea how long the whole process might take though and, so little time to use the phone or take time out at work.

Everywhere's closed by the time I finish.

I've done the calculator thing and have found I'm not eligible for help with solicitors fees - urgh

Will pursue this though as we have no options.

StewieGriffinsMom Wed 23-Mar-11 09:32:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Collaborate Wed 23-Mar-11 10:01:57

The REMO section at the Dept of Justice is fastidious in complying with it's REMO obligations. If you have an issue with them get in touch. I think the initial point of contact is your local court administrators (ie in the UK the Dept of Justice).

StewieGriffinsMom Wed 23-Mar-11 10:45:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wabbit Sat 26-Mar-11 17:39:06

Thanks - will find out about the department of justice to begin with

wabbit Sat 26-Mar-11 20:26:12

HMCS doesn't seem to refer directly to Maintenance Orders, what label will it be under? And, the pre-court protocols - I haven't done anything other than talk to the CSA about ExP's emigration. Will I still be able to apply directly to the courts and, will I be able to do it online or only through my local magistrates court?

STIDW Sat 26-Mar-11 21:09:09

I think in England & Wales you apply to your local court for an order for financial relief under the Children Act 1989 and then the court can help you complete the REMO. Sometimes the court officials don't know about REMO and it is necessary to refer them to the REMO unit at the Official Solicitors.

The forms you need are C1 + C10 + C10A and guides CB1 and CB2 which can be downloaded from HMCS website. Court officials can advise you about the correct forms, fees etc and check that you have filled in the relevant bits but they can't say anything which might be construed as legal advice.

If that is wrong I'm sure someone will be along shortly to correct me.

Collaborate Sat 26-Mar-11 23:46:01

Stop press! I've had a new case land on my lap this week that means I've educated myself. It's a 1972 act that enforces a new york convention from I think the '50s. under it you can get the foreign court to set the correct level of maintenance. Here is a link

www.officialsolicitor.gov.uk/os/remo.htm

wabbit Sun 27-Mar-11 02:15:04

Ooh revelatious! (I know that's not a proper word) I will read the link...

Thank you STIDW smile

elenalaw1 Sat 29-Oct-16 22:36:13

- I have just learnt that my ex-husband has now the foreign country he was living and that he has re-integrated our then marital home in the UK.
Now that he is back in the UK, I am aware that there are reciprocal and international maintenance orders agreements between the UK and a number of countries known as Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Orders (REMOs) where I could claim maintenance from my ex-husband since he is now back living in the UK.

Could anyone tell me whether Mauritius forms part of the Reciprocal Enforcement of Maintenance Orders (REMOs) agreement? I had a look at the list but it is still "to be confirmed".

Thank you.

user1497582089 Fri 16-Jun-17 04:21:26

If the paying parent moves overseas and becomes Non Resident in the UK for Tax Purposes how does that effect maintenance payments? Reading the 2012 Scheme it suggests that overseas earnings that are not UK taxable are not classed as income?

Anybody faced this situation before? If so how did they tackle it?

Trethew Fri 16-Jun-17 10:37:12

Start a new thread!!

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