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Third baby?

8 replies

brads88 · 05/04/2019 10:01

I'm not sure if this is the right board to post on but I'm not sure where else to post...

Ever since my second child (a little sister to a big brother) was born I've been thinking more and more about a third baby. My husband isn't sold...we always talked about 2 babies so me suggesting a third is new for him. I've told him if he is sure he doesn't want anymore I will respect that but he has to get a vasectomy as I don't want to be back on birth control for the next 20 years. But he won't as he says he may change his mind in a few years about a third.

I guess my question is...how hard is the jump from 2-3? What is the most difficult thing about it? Is life really that much harder with 3 children than 2? TIA

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JellySlice · 05/04/2019 10:19

Two things IME:

The world seems to be set up for families of 4. Cars, packets of food, family travel offers, everything. So it can get awkward and sometimes pensive. Our biggest outlay was having to buy an MPV in order to accommodate 3 carseats.
Ensuring that middle child doesn't get overlooked.

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JellySlice · 05/04/2019 10:21

I love having more than 2. The dynamic is so different . And the children interact with each other differently, too.

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Fraula · 05/04/2019 10:22

You probably have to lower expectations of time for yourself.

You have to sometimes facilitate activities and play, without always having time to play with them 1:1.

I avoid too many extra curricular things as can't deal with the endless lifts and waiting around with younger ones.

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Fraula · 05/04/2019 10:23

I have 4 and like jellyslice, I like a bigger family dynamic (and chaos!)

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cliquewhyohwhy · 05/04/2019 10:24

I only wanted two but had my surprise third was an added bonus. My little girl brings a great new dynamic to all the boys in the house.

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CatyaPurella · 19/04/2019 22:42

Depends on the age gap too, my eldest two were in school when my DS came along. Three kids is fab but fucking expensive & not really something I was prepared for

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Ding3kids · 23/04/2019 22:16

Mine are 2, 4 and 6. I'd always said 3 or 4 so hubby knew from the start but I love it. All 3 of mine play really nicely together or if one doesn't play then generally one other will. If I need to have 1 to 1 time then the other 2 distract each other (sometimes!). I've 2 older boys and the youngest is a girl and they're both besotted with her.
Downsides I guess is like the phrase goes your only as happy as your unhappiest child, more chance of that. Holidays is a bit more planning for a decent room but can be done. We'd planned a big car when pregnant for my 2nd as we knew we would try for a 3rd. At the moment they're little so don't know about future costs.
It's more work but it's more joy for me. But everyone's different.