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Did you initially plan to have a large family?

(36 Posts)
Goostacean Wed 28-Nov-18 23:36:46

If you have 3+ children, did you always plan to have many? Or did you plan one or two and then decide to keep going? smile

I ask because I have one currently and oscillate between wanting to keep him as an only forever, now that we’ve hit an easier stage (10mo) and I’m really enjoying life, or taking the plunge and aiming for my fantasy of 5 grin

MissEleanorShellstrop Mon 28-Jan-19 15:54:34

Originally planned for none, before changing our minds and having one. Very soon after, we decided that we weren't too bad at this parenting malarkey and had another one. Quite soon after that there was an incident involving a broken condom and now we have:
Dd1: Nearly 4
Dd2: 2.5
Dd3: 18months
Dd4: 18months

So yeah.

spinabifidamom Fri 08-Feb-19 14:40:03

I have six kids.

DD is 17, DS is 14, DD is 11, DS is 8, DD is 5 and I have B/G twins aged 2 too. We are trying for baby number seven right now. I love it personally even if it is hard work. I love children.

steppemum Fri 08-Feb-19 14:45:13

wanted three, have three.
I am one of 3 and so is dh.

2 feels too small, too neat, to oragnised for me.
4 feels like I wouldn't cope!

thatsmyspace Fri 08-Feb-19 14:52:17

Wanted 6. Have 5. Slowly going insane. But thinking of going for that 6th and final baby 🙈 what's one more 🙃

spinabifidamom Fri 08-Feb-19 18:06:29

I must be crazy. But a big family is so appealing.

lljkk Fri 08-Feb-19 18:07:02

No. I don't do planned pregnancy.

Tsotofamily Fri 08-Feb-19 21:05:33

I always wanted a big family, never planned a number bit have 4.
Dd1 12
Ds 10
Dd2 7
Dd3 2 1/2

Likeagibbon Tue 28-May-19 20:36:16

No. I had thought ideally 2 would be nice but I would be happy with just 1! I remember our good friends always saying they would have 4 and thinking 'wow thats crazy. Why so many?' Haha. They have since had 2 and are absolutely certain they are done.. we have had 3 and are ttc 4. Dd1 6yo dd2 3yo and ds1 is 1yo. I love my children to bits. Its so busy and tough and tiring at times but nothing comes close to the joy they bring.

NameChangerAmI Thu 30-May-19 06:17:46

DH and I both wanted 4 and have 4. I did actually burst into tears when DC4 was a babe in arms, and he said that DC4 was "definitely our last;" in my hormonal fog, I couldn't bare to think that there would be no more babies. grin

But, that feeling didn't last long & 4 is my perfect number. It's very OCD and a bit bizarre, but I wouldn't like to have an odd number anyway. I know that's ridiculous, though.

What sort of ages gaps are you thinking, OP?

imperialqueen Sat 08-Jun-19 13:41:11

I have four, 17, 14, 11 and 9. Always knew I would like more than 2, (I am one of three and dh is one of four).

We had fertility issues so didn't have our first until after 12 years of marriage. Then they all came along like buses!

I would say it all got easier once the last child started school. I found it incredibly hard work when they were all younger. Even though there is exactly 8 years between the oldest and youngest. Goodness knows how hard I would have found smaller age gaps.

It amazes me how as soon as one is away I find it so much easier. Oldest was away for a week and I kept thinking "wow, 3 kids is so easy". I am sure people with 5 kids must think 4 is so easy etc.

Though I do love having a large family. Even though I've probably made it sound like I don't smile

Goostacean Thu 20-Jun-19 15:27:37

Thanks so much for all your answers! I was back on the Larger Families board under a different username (love reading on this topic), and was thinking what a great question this was, when I realised I was the OP 😂

Well, since my original query we had a not-preventing-but-I'm-sure-it'll-be-fine moment... and suffice to say, it wasn't fine, and DC2 is due in Nov! So we'll have two under two, plus both parents in high stress jobs, which is... daunting to say the least. Had a particularly tough time in the last month for various reasons so haven't really had a chance to get our heads around it, but hopefully I'm almost 2/5s the way to my "big family" dream 😂 Although DS is a great sleeper now, 11-12hs a night and happily adapted to a mix of nursery and family care, so certainly daunted by going back to sleepless nights. But also looking forward to newborn snuggles, breastfeeding again hopefully (only weaned 6 weeks ago), chubby little legs... and a child who remains where you left them, unlike boisterous DS!

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