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Will I regret my decision

(10 Posts)
molly84 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:06:52

I always imagined having at least three children, but I have to admit I find it very demanding with two. I have two beautiful boys under 3, and they are awesome. However, it's hard work. I've recently changed my mind about a large family, and want to feel complete with two children only, enjoy and cherish them. My husband feels the same.

I'm worried that I may regret this decision later on though. I already get a bit of a broody feeling when I see families with three children, but this passss quickly when I have an exhausting day with my two.

Anyone here wanted a large family, but happy they stuck with two?

Any thoughts/advice would be great.

Ironwoman123 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:10:37

No advice as I'm in the same position. I always wanted 3 but have 2. My heart will always want another one I think but I honestly don't think I'll ever stop wanting 1.

Even after 3 I'd still want 1 more I think.

I've decided to stop at 2 as in reality I didn't realise how demanding it would be. My first born had less attention than I liked after second was born and I can't imagine what it would be like with another 1.

I know I won't regret it as I'm already close to my limit so I know it's the correct decision for me.

I'm now focusing on enjoying my 2 rather than longing for more.

molly84 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:19:07

Thank you Ironwoman. Close to my limit is exactly how I feel. I guess it's natural to always feel a little broody at times, and I would probably always feel I'd want just one more too.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Thu 09-Mar-17 10:21:27

I have three, but had the second two a long time after my first- they are 9, 19 months and 2 months.

I couldn't imagine having another whilst the two babies are so small, but I am definitely open to the idea of one more in maybe 3 or 4 years as they get a bit more independent.

OhDearToby Thu 09-Mar-17 10:24:08

How old are you? Do you have time to say not now, maybe in 3/4/5 years?

I have a 5 year gap between my first two and was really worried about the age gap but it's been great. Dd1 was at school so she didn't miss out on my attention and dd2 got lots of my time too. Dd1 is also a great help with her little sister, will occupy her while I make dinner etc.

molly84 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:26:47

Thanks for your reply. Maybe things will be different in a few years time, but I do worry a lot about suddenly wanting another later on and then it be too late.

I think I want to make peace with never having a large family and be ok with that. I'm so lucky to have two, and I just don't think I'm superwoman enough for more!

molly84 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:28:12


OhDearToby Thu 09-Mar-17 10:33:01

You might find as yours grow up a bit the urge lessens anyway. I found that with dd1. I was desperately broody when she was aged up till 3 but then she got so much easier and I realised the benefits of older children! It feels like you've entered a different (easier!) phase. It was actually really hard for me to decide to have another one at all, I'd have been perfectly happy with just dd1 at that point.

AllGone Thu 09-Mar-17 10:38:34

We have 2 young DC with a 2 year age gap and DH and I always wanted 2 DC. Lately though I definitely have a longing for another baby.

However, I have realised that whilst I might have a longing for another baby I definitely don't have a longing for the reality of having 3 small DC and neither does DH. Life is busy enough already!

I am very much concentrating on the two wonderful DC we have and accepting that it is probably a natural biological thing to feel broody at times.

molly84 Thu 09-Mar-17 10:42:37

Thank you for your messages

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