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AIBU she is forcing me to use small car for 3 kids in both g seats

(43 Posts)
craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 12:14:59

We have 3 children, 6,2 and 1 and I had a Renault Grande Espace which broke down and is now dead. My husband has a Range Rover Evoque which he drives to his work car park and drives it home again in the evenings. He bought a golf gti to use untill we can afford to get another bigger car for me and me use the Range Rover. He has now decided because there are a few footprints on the back of the seat that he wants to use that and me use the golf even though it is a very tight squeeze with the drivers seat too far forwards. I have offered to put a cover on the back of the seat and have been taking their shoes off. I can understand he doesn't want the kids in the car but it is just untill march. What do you all think?

kittybiscuits Mon 02-Jan-17 12:16:24

I think your husband sounds like a wanker.

Palomb Mon 02-Jan-17 12:17:45

He does indeed sound like a prize cunt.

Rubyslippers7780 Mon 02-Jan-17 12:19:07

Suggest he gets 3 kids seats in and out smaller car and drives he can see how unreasonable he is being.

Thinkingblonde Mon 02-Jan-17 12:19:30

He's putting his car before his kids. Are the kids at risk, I wouldn't be happy with three car seats in the back of a Golf.

MissPatty Mon 02-Jan-17 12:20:41

Why have you let him just decide this for you? Just say "No, what you're suggesting makes no sense" and then carry on using the bigger car. You're both parents, both capable of cleaning up child related mess from your cars.
He sounds like a total wanker

verystressedmum Mon 02-Jan-17 12:27:23

Why didn't you get a bigger car in the meantime? Im sure you can get bigger cars that are older etc for the same price as a golf (or about the same as you paid for the golf roughly as I'm making an assumption that you didn't get a 20 year old golf but I may be wrong...)
Are you not part of any decision making?

craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 15:19:57

The agreement was that I use the bigger car and he would get a small runaround to get to work and back untill we can afford a better car for me. But since he bought the golf he has changed his mind. I will say that the Range Rover is a company lease car and he has 2 years left on it and needs to be in mint condition but if I cover the seat I don't see the problem and mud cleans off easily enough. I don't let the kids eat or drink in the car either.

paddlenorapaddle Mon 02-Jan-17 15:22:19

He's being a twat tell you'll have the rover until such time as a bigger car becomes available tough shit x

Whosthemummynow Mon 02-Jan-17 15:28:55

Kind of changes things with your update op! Can kind of understand why he doesn't want the kids in it if it's a lease car. They've been kicking the backs of the seats, doesn't take much to catch and cause a tear. Plus if they are kicking inside the car it leads in to other possibilities. Swinging doors open into other car etc.

If it wasn't a lease I'd say he was bu, but....

AyeAmarok Mon 02-Jan-17 15:34:15

So he'd rather you drive unsafely with your seat in the wrong position, with his 3 children in the car, than get some mud on the seats?

Your husband is a stupid selfish prick.

Tell him to wind his neck in and fuck off.

Who put him in charge? Just tell him no.

AyeAmarok Mon 02-Jan-17 15:36:56

I will say that the Range Rover is a company lease car and he has 2 years left on it and needs to be in mint condition

Still doesn't matter. If it's not in mint condition then he may need to pay a charge for the damage. That's life when you have 3 young children (especially when you've bought a second car they don't fit in).

I maintain, he's a twat.

craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 15:40:01

I can see it it from his point of course but am doing everything to ensure they don't ruin it. The back of the seats are hard not fabric so the mud wipes/brushed off and I have now been taking their shoes off so not to get dirt on them. There is a child lock so they can't swing the doors open into other cars. I just find it really hard work getting them in and out of the golf everyday and also this might seem really shallow but I have had a few comments from parents at school that he is selfish and out of order if he makes me have the golf and it's embarrassing for them to think that of my dh but he doesn't seem to think anyone would.

Northernlurker Mon 02-Jan-17 15:41:12

Why on earth did I get a car like that on the lease scheme? Only reason for a big car on lease is for the family. He sounds like a shocker op. Does he have any redeeming features?

He is putting the car above his children's safety - ask him how he thinks that is acceptable.

craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 15:49:09

Haha Northernlurker! Luckily he is a really good dh and Dad but unfortunately this isn't showing him in the best light 😕And he is putting the car first!

craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 19:20:22

Ok so he still isn't giving in, I wondered if there are any husbands on here and what their opinion is?

DeadZed Mon 02-Jan-17 19:26:27

When you said it the range rover is a company car I can totally understand why your dh needs to keep it spotless. I do think it a little unfair that he has chosen the car you are using everyday though. However I know my dh could not justify leaving his car for me to drive the kids around in. His car needs to be spotless as part of his contract.

AyeAmarok Mon 02-Jan-17 19:29:05


Any "husbands on here" who thought it was reasonable to risk the safety of their children would equally be knobbers. Why do you value men's opinions over women's? Women also drive company lease cars, you know.

Just woman up and tell him that your DS's safety is more important than his penis extension of a car, and he can drive the Golf.

Longdistance Mon 02-Jan-17 19:31:48

It's a company dodgem. My dh has had loads of them over the years, and given them back in not great condition with no issues.

I think your Dh is being a complete cock!

PhilODox Mon 02-Jan-17 19:31:51

What, women don't get leased company cars? hmm
Kicking hard seats does scuff and scratch them- my children have destroyed the ones in my car, so he's right there. I wouldn't let three children that age use a leased car that needs to be returned in immaculate condition!
But- you have offered to.cover the seats to prevent this, and he was a wanker to get a golf.gti for you to use in the meantime. Why didnt you choose the car you're going to drive?
Let me guess... it was his money paying for it?

PhilODox Mon 02-Jan-17 19:32:28

X-post with ayeamarok.

craftycarls Mon 02-Jan-17 21:10:23

Sorry about the husband comment I obviously respect everyone's opinions on here but he said oh of course all you mum's will stick together and if there was a dadsnet they would side with him!

I thought that was why you asked that, craftycarls. Of course, the fact that he would think we are all sheep who cannot have our own, sensibly thought out opinions on a matter, doesn't reflect too well on him.

I would really like to know why he thinks the car's safety and wellbeing are more important than the safety and wellbeing of his children and his wife.

Any driving instructor - male or female - will tell you that you have to have the car seat in the optimal position for you, and that not doing so makes your driving less safe. He wants you to drive less safely. Would the pristine condition of the Range Rover comfort him if one or all of you were killed or seriously injured in an accident that happened because you couldn't drive as well as you should, because your seat is too far forward? I doubt it.

I have consulted dh on this - so we can all relax - a Man has Spoken wink.

He says that craftycarl's offer to put seat covers in is the sensible option, and her dh should let her have the bigger car, in which she can drive their children safely.

He agrees her dh is a nobber for making her squeeze into the Golf which she can't drive safely with the car seats in.

He also says the Evoque is a girl's car anyway.

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