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Step family

(5 Posts)
Twinny123 Sun 06-Nov-16 16:06:21

Ok I need help to see if I'm been unreasonable. I am preganant with twins to my new partner and already have 3 boys to my ex husband. Now he has taken these 3 on amazingly and with no contact from there farther they see him as there dad. His family also have taken them on amazing. But since finding out we are having twins. I feel things are going to be different. Keep hearing oh when you have the twins I'll have them when for instance you take your lads to clubs or I'll have them for the night or I'll have the twins twins twins. Now I have kinda bit back and said look the other 3 are not going to be pushed away by me or anybody else they get treated as 5 or not at all. I dont expect someone to have all 5 at once not at all. I agree its gonna be 3 and the twins. As different needs etc. But am I wrong to think why not I'll take the biys to clubs so you can relax and not have to run around etc and then week after you take them I'll have the twins...I just feel now our older 3 may get or feel pushed aside and is the last thingi want. Please help. Xxx

Twinny123 Sun 06-Nov-16 16:07:25

This is from one of the parents on his side not him xxx

Ilovecaindingle Tue 03-Jan-17 21:11:49

Sounds like you and dp make a great team and will be saying thanks but no thanks to the outside help!!

PuntCuffin Tue 03-Jan-17 21:24:18

Maybe they are thinking it will allow the older three to have time with you so they don't feel they have been pushed aside by you having two more?

flappynewyear Tue 31-Jan-17 17:31:14

How new is the new partner? IME it takes a long time to build up family ties and I do think that they will naturally be more inclined to their biological grandchildren as they will watch them grow etc. It is quite a big ask to expect step GP's to "take on" children that are not theirs and feel inclined towards them as if they were. As a PP says you and your DP may have to decline help if you think it may be divisive.

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