Wanting 6th baby.. am I mad .. other factors too

(18 Posts)
flippyflapper Tue 01-Nov-16 17:41:16

Hi everyone,

We have 5dc age 13,10,5 and twins 4

All straight forward quick deliveries with first 3 twins are identical so had a csection where I lost a lot of blood.

After all this i guess and the shock of it all we decided dh got a vasectomy and he did.

So now here we are nearly 5 years later and the want for another child is so strong has been for about 18 months and I keep thinking it will pass i just absolutely love everything that involves babies and children and watching them grow.

Me and dh were talking yesterday and he admitted he also felt the same and just on a while emailed a hospital local about vasectomy reversal.

Problems that are bothering me this would (if all went well) my 5th pregnancy but 6th baby I'm petrified after reading about pph and increased risks.

But on plus size we are financially in a great place have a spare room kids would love a baby brother or sister.

So I suppose I wanted to see 1. Are we crazy?
2. I don't want to bleed to death
3. Doctors are going to be mean and frighten us.

neonrainbow Tue 01-Nov-16 17:41:56

What if you had multiples again?

Icapturethecast1e Tue 01-Nov-16 17:45:03

How about fostering babies. I know it's not the same as having your own but you could provide a loving home for them for some time.

CheeseandGherkins Tue 01-Nov-16 17:53:09

I have 6 live dcs, 1 stillborn, so 7 full term pregnancies. My youngest is 11 weeks. I had a c section with her and the one previous to her. I didn't lose much blood with any of mine and no one spoke to me about a higher risk. I was very high risk due to the stillbirth (she was my 4th), and I also have very complicated pregnancies. I don't think you're crazy.

If you read up about pph some more (I did a lot as it was also a concern of mine) you aren't at a higher risk just because you have more babies. It's more down to how previous births went, so it could be a factor for you, depending on the reason for your blood loss. I'd want to discuss that with the consultant first as it could be ill advised to have another or it could be something they prepared for.

flippyflapper Tue 01-Nov-16 19:21:32

Thank you all replying to me and not thinking I'm crazy.

Cheese I'm so sorry about your stillbirth.
They never really told me what happened with the pph I just remeber being theatre and them saying that they are trying to stop the bleeding .. it was all calm etc so I wasn't worried or with it to be honest. Maybe as it was twins and my womb was extra stretched? I had a drip in recovery and someone kept coming into check me that's all I knew until the midwife at home said I had lost a lot of blood and was I feeling OK.. I was pretty much unaware of it to be honest.

I have thought about of its twins again but as mine are identical where 1 egg split it isn't as common as falling again as it is with 2 eggs being released, I was told the chances aren't high of it happening again, but honestly my twins were by far the easiest babies, yes hard having 2 newborns but so good and had each other helped I think.

Oooh I would absolutely love to foster babies, but I really don't no anything about it

griffinsss Sat 05-Nov-16 03:02:42

You're not mad.

You should consult a health professional about the risks before you make any decisions though.

septembersunshine Sat 05-Nov-16 03:22:07

No, your not mad. I just had my 4th even though it was my 4th section and quite dangerous because of scar tissue and thin womb. I have the worst pregnancies too. We were told not to ever have another baby after dc3 6 years ago. He is 10 weeks now and I feel complete and so happy. Right decision for our family. It was a gut instinct that I really wanted another baby...the desire was insane and I don't think it would have gone away. I would go ahead with enquires and proceed if you have looked at the whole thing from all angles. Good luck op!

user1478904621 Thu 17-Nov-16 11:51:56

Well if you're mad than I'm mad too lol. I'm broody for number 6. The only thing holding me back is the fact dh doesn't even know I'm broody! Plus I know I'll never hear the end of it from my mum. I'm due to have my coil out soon cause of heavy monthlies & dh doesn't like condoms so I'm hoping he'll get carried away at the right time lol. I know that sounds bad but if a guy doesn't want to put anything on the end of it then surely he shouldn't be surprised if she gets preg! Financially we are secure & have a huge house. Age is a prob though. I'm 42 now confused If your dh is up for it then I say go for it! Someone said to me last yr "you only regret the things u didn't do". Hmm think I need a chat with my dh lol.

flippyflapper Mon 28-Nov-16 14:19:52

Hi everyone, I just popped back on to say hi.
We haven't really talked anymore about it to be honest, it all seams like a big hurdle just because I feel broody.
I'm glad I'm not the only one tho, I have a feeling that the broody Ness won't go and I'm panicking about getting older.
I thinks it's a dream that may never happen and I will more than likely regret.

To all the broody mums .. do you ever see new baby's or friends babies and just feel so sad actually tearful?

Largemelons Mon 28-Nov-16 22:44:30

I've just found out I'm expecting number 6!
Slightly scared, there'll be a 6 year gap between baby and DC 5, but pretty excited too.
Hoping for a sticky one as I've lost 3 pregnancies early on at around 5 weeks.
If this goes well then 100% DH will be going for the snip.

flippyflapper Mon 12-Dec-16 15:54:35

I've just seen this. Congratulations.

How exciting for you all.

We have been talking more and more about it and I wish it was easier for us.

Needmorechocolate Mon 12-Dec-16 20:55:40

Congratulations, what wonderful news x

Mummamayhem Mon 12-Dec-16 21:04:58

Every pregnancy, number 1 or number 10 carries it's own unknown risks so while one of your births has been high risk 3 haven't....so you're not being reckless. You know what another child would entail and can afford it, I'd say go for it! Heck, what's 6 when you already have 5 smile

ghostspirit Mon 12-Dec-16 21:16:16

I have 6 children 3 hospital births and 3 home births all straight forward. Although I was advised not to have home birth with my youngest. Due to risk of heavy bleeding and anemia. But I had no history of heavy bleeding. I did have to have infusions whilst pregnant. And I refused hospital so got my home birth. I guess really my situationcwas very different. Having a 6th child is not much different than 5 managing/
Coping wise.

18 months is a while to.have been feeling you both want another baby. As others say do some research. Good luck

flippyflapper Wed 14-Dec-16 09:07:55

Thank you.

We are going to keep it in our mind till after xmas and if we both feel it's something we want we are going to look into it.

I've gone through everything in my head all the pros and cons and asked the children last night that if it was possible how would they all feel about another brother or sister and they all said they would love it, so that is a bonus because if they weren't keen I think it would make it a lot more harder.

Thank you all for you experiences.

As for what I remember having twins plus a csection there was a high chance of bleeding as my uterus was stretched a lot more so need to work harder to contract down.

Thinking ahead wayyyy a head if I were to get pregnant I hope I could have the baby naturally and not a csection again.

yaela123 Sun 01-Jan-17 17:57:58

Of course you're not mad!

I have 6, DS age 16 and 5 DDs aged 14, 10, 6, 5, 5 (DTs) so 5 pregnancies. I had very easy pregnancies and births with the first three. DD4, however, ended in an emergency c section and I was advised no more, which was fine as we'd always wanted 4. I was on the pill but somehow got pregnant again! And it was ID twins! That was a very difficult pregnancy with horrendous back pain, sickness, etc. and I had to have a c section because of complications with previous birth and also it was twins. It wasn't a good experience.

Now though I love having 6 kids and I'm so glad we had DTs. Every pregnancy is going to have risks so I'd say do some research but if that's what you really want then go for it.

yaela123 Sun 01-Jan-17 18:03:50

I mean DD3 not 4

rollonthesummer Sun 01-Jan-17 18:04:05

Go for it-I'm just jealous you have a 6+ bedroomed house and can afford another child! We stopped at 3 but I would have loved 4-it was just money that stopped us sad

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