6 and wanting more - am I crazy?

(3 Posts)
griffinsss Mon 31-Oct-16 23:41:31

My DP and I have been together a little over 3 years and are due to be married in January. We don't live together yet but are in the process of buying a house together. He has 3 DC from previous relationships (6,7,17) and I have 2 (both 5 soon) plus have full custody of my niece (12).

When we were first engaged, we discussed having a child together and it seemed idyllic. Now the realities of having seven dependants are setting in. I'm sure people do it, and they manage and even love it, right? From the outside, I know I would say "why would you even want anymore" or something of that nature, and I don't know, but I just don't feel finished. My DDs weren't planned and their bio dad has never been involved and I suppose I always thought that eventually I would have another child or two with someone and experience it all differently and "properly".

There isn't a time crunch I suppose; I'm only in my mid 20s, but I don't want to stall my career again in my 30s to have children if that makes sense.

I don't really know why I'm posting or what I'm asking but I just needed to discuss this with people who know what it's like to have more than the average number of DC! Oh, and to ask if you think I'm crazy for even considering it. Thanks.

YouCanDoThis Mon 31-Oct-16 23:47:48

I can see that you have responsibility for six children, yet you have only experienced one pregnancy and that was without support. It is understandable that you want to share a pregnancy and child with someone who supports and loves you. You don't need to make any decisions just now though. You are going through big changes in buying the house and merging the families. Perhaps you could see how things are once you have all settled into the new setup and you have more stability. You might feel differently, or be in a better position to discuss and make choices. Good luck!

griffinsss Tue 01-Nov-16 01:02:41

Thank you for the support YouCanDoThis (apt name, huh?). I'm pleased that someone else understands why I feel the way that I do.

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