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2 or 3 children family? advice needed!

(11 Posts)
fortheloveofmamma Wed 13-Apr-16 12:03:28

We have two children (48 and 22 mnths old) .. we keep discussing whether to try for a third, but I already feel at capacity! any advice? what's the difference between 2 and 3 kids? Is the step from 2 to 3 as big as it was from 1 to 2?

Tsotofamily Wed 13-Apr-16 16:18:12

The only thing I found difficult actually that's not really the right word but the thing I needed to juggle and sort out was breastfeeding and getting o with normal evening routine as my older 2 were both at school, so needed to do reading, any other homework and cook dinner whilst feeding baby.
I didn't really find going from 2-3 hard nor going from 1-2 really. I think routine and being organised helped alot. But also being relaxed and calm at the same time

ThroughThickAndThin01 Wed 13-Apr-16 16:30:45

Going from 2-3 was s breeze for me. Ds3 was born when ds1 was 2.2 and ds2 21 months. The first 10 years was a doddle.

Now they are teens I'm finding parenting a real struggle. And they are generally great kids. Always in the car with them, parties, late nights, drinking, girlfriend advice, , sex advice, friendship advice, and exams exams exams. It's exhausting! And costly £££££s. I feel very old, but I was 36 when I had Ds3. DS1 is at uni so just 2 at home currently.

I'd never wish he wasn't here, of course not, but 3 is a lot for me.

(And I wanted 4! - thank you so much DH for sticking your heels in over that!)

Only you can really decide OP. I had to have ds3, no one could have told me anything negative which would have stopped me.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Wed 13-Apr-16 16:32:05

...sorry..Ds1 was 4.2, not 2.2!

fortheloveofmamma Thu 14-Apr-16 09:20:09

Many thanks for your thoughts! I keep waiting for something to make my mind up for me .. I'm going to be 37 tomorrow, so that might decide things anyway ;-)

WordGetsAround Thu 14-Apr-16 09:24:02

You don't have to go for DC3 straight away - you could wait a year or so. I was operating at capacity at your stage too, but now I've got time on my hands again we're going for it!

NewStartNewName Thu 14-Apr-16 09:33:49

I have 3 and to be honest the older they get the harder it seems to get. Not just dealing with hormonal pre-teens, and the moods etc that come with it, but also the cost and the constant taxi services!

I was 29 when I had DC3 and 30 was my cut off age (completely set by me), I couldn't imagine dealing with toddlers in my 40s and stroppy teens in my 50s.

Nibbl3s Thu 14-Apr-16 09:50:06

48 months? So they are 4?confused

ayesar Fri 15-Apr-16 03:52:59

Very interesting perspective. I am also considering a third and I always hear the perspective of moms with 3 little ones. I have had a lot of people tell me that kids are more difficult when they get older. Aaah it's a very hard decision. Seems that more people that have 3 feel life would have been easier with 2, than people with 2 regretting not going for 3. I'm not even sure why I want to have another child...my life is easy now and having 3 would complicate it. It's hard sorting through the feelings and coming to a practical decision though.

ayesar Fri 15-Apr-16 03:53:36

Very interesting perspective. I am also considering a third and I always hear the perspective of moms with 3 little ones. I have had a lot of people tell me that kids are more difficult when they get older. Aaah it's a very hard decision. Seems that more people that have 3 feel life would have been easier with 2, than people with 2 regretting not going for 3. I'm not even sure why I want to have another child...my life is easy now and having 3 would complicate it. It's hard sorting through the feelings and coming to a practical decision though.

WhatTheFrikkinFrack Fri 15-Apr-16 04:07:09

I have 8 and tbh the hardest jumps for me were 1-2 kids and then 5-6 kids but on the 5-6 I had an undiagnosed condition so I expect that heavily contributed.
Once I had two we just adjusted to each new little person and carried on ( mine are 11 and under sonics by no means got huge age gaps.
They don't necessarily get yards as they get older it's just the dynamic changes. I have one 11 year old who is a breeze, my 8 year old is an absolute terror and has major mood swings, hormone filed tantrums and throws her weight around with her younger sister. At times it's really hard and other times it's really easy- organisation is the key, a good meal plan and financial budget goes a long way
Hope this is helpful xx

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