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Another baby after twins

(3 Posts)
Theydidit Tue 08-Mar-16 15:20:54

So hubby and I have been debating whether and when to have another baby. We have 16 month old twin boys and would both like another but have so many worries! Hubby's mainly revolve around money - ie we'd need a bigger car and would eventually have to get a loft conversion - couldn't afford many holidays etc.
Mine are a bit different...
I worry about whether a new baby would feel left out because my boys are so close and would obviously be likely to have similar interests. They also share a room and it's not big enough for 3 so baby would get the box room. Also is it fair on my boys? They've always had to share attention (and a room)- would it be even harder with a third child to contend with?
Also if we did go for it what would be a good age gap? I find it difficult taking the boys out on my own at the moment (and I am on my own with them most of the time - dh works long hours, no family nearby) but we do go out almost every day just not sure how I'd get around with 3. Triple buggy? Would they all run off in 3 different directions?
I should say that it took us 4 years and 6 rounds of Ivf to get our boys and we've said we wouldn't do Ivf again so there's a good chance we wouldn't be able to have any more anyway and if that was the case we would be very happy with our lot but should we try?
I do think that part of my reason - albeit a small part - is because I feel we kind of missed out on all the pregnancy and newborn experience. We had a lot of pregnancy issues and once they were born we had quite a lot of problems too although they are fine and healthy now ☺
So can anyone give me some advice or thoughts please?

jamtartandcustard Wed 09-Mar-16 10:39:36

If you want it, go for it. Things will work out you do manage. You don't need a bigger car. It's more comfortable but as long as you have 5 seat belts and don't have another set of twins then a small car is just fine. Also why the loft conversion? If your boys can happily share and baby gets the box room there's no need to have an extra room anytime soon. Maybe in 10 years or so but not now. Holidays? We still have foreign holidays. Ok yes options are less. Hotels are generally out of the question for large families and hugely expensive so we usually hire a villa instead. To reduce cost go out of season. Spain and Italy in October are lovely! And so much cheaper then August!
I wouldn't worry about getting around just yet because you said it took a while to conceive so your boys might be out of a pushchair anyway. Just cross that bridge when you get to it

StarlingBirdsong Sun 17-Apr-16 08:30:51

I've just had DC4 after twins last time although I do have an older one too.

In terms of having one singleton plus twins - my older 3 all share a room because DC1 wanted to not be on his own - would your bigger room handle 3 in bunks? there is a very cool triple bunk on the market somewhere.

we decided to have a fourth because we were finding having 3 meant one was being left out. obviously this is just our experience. plus I likewise felt I missed out on having my last baby as with twins there is just no time to savour the moment is there?! and from that point of view I am loving it! our age gap is 5,3,3 newborn.

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