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Is 3 a crowd?

(9 Posts)
Tinkerisdead Thu 30-Jun-11 17:06:45

I dont think I'm going to articulate this very well at all.

I have a DD, am pregnant with DC2 and have an overwhelming feeling it will be another girl. I've always wanted three children but I think in my head I envisaged a 2:1 ratio genderwise. I never really imagined three of one type IYSWIM.

Now I have quite a lot of friends who are 1 of 3. Also know parents of three children who are older than me and all have a resounding "dont do it, three is an odd number, someone is always left out".

I know loads of girls who are 1 of 3 and they all seem to pair up within their siblings. "I get on with her, but not her and we cant all be together ever!"

Yet those who have say two sisters and a brother seem better with it, maybe as they are different genders and werent so "pushed together". They seem to have an equal relationship with each sibling.

I know this is a complete generalisation, but its what I've witnessed with friends who have 2 siblings. So is three a crowd, is someone always left out?

Haribojoe Thu 30-Jun-11 20:31:34

I have 3 DS (6,3 and 10 months) I know it's early days but so far I haven't noticed anyone getting left out.

If anything having a younger sibling brings out the best in the other two as they both love playing with him and doing things that make him laugh.

I have always wanted 4 DC (god willing will have a fourth soon) but if 3 is my lot then I'll be happy and I think they will be close to each other regardless.


Lollyheart Thu 30-Jun-11 20:36:37

I have 3, a girl and 2 boys, I find if it's just two of them at home they play so nicely togethersmile as soon as the 3rd is on the scene all hell breaks loose grin but they do all play together nicely most of the time.

Dc4 due soon wink

kickingking Thu 30-Jun-11 20:42:40

I am one of three. I have a sister and a brother.

I wouldn't have three, even if I could afford it, because it just always seemed awkward to me. The ganging up on one, the 'family ticket plus one child', someone always had to sit in the middle on long car trips....I love my siblings but three was just an awkward number ime.

People always went on at my parents about only having three so they could get a boy (really nice for DD2 to hear, I'm sure!)

But also I'm strange and dislike odd numbers blush

thisisyesterday Thu 30-Jun-11 20:49:12

i have 3 boys and so far we've had no instances of any of them getting left out

they're only 6,3 and 2 though

MrsK70 Thu 30-Jun-11 21:06:53

I am one of three (I have a brother and a sister) and I have always liked it. I don't remember any feeling of it not being right or feeling left out (and I'm in the middle too!) when i was growing up. It just seemed normal to me. We sometimes all played together but not always - it didn't seem to matter. I'm not sure why children should have to play as unit anyway, does it matter if two play together and one does something else? I appreciate that if one is being left out of a particular game that they want to join in with it isn't nice, but that can happen with any number - I often have one of mine wanting to do something alone and the other is desperate to join in, and that's with just 2 children. At other times they play together beautifully.

Tinkerisdead Fri 01-Jul-11 14:39:32

Thankyou for the replies. Its interesting to see other people's experiences. I did say I was generalising and I know each situation is different.

My Mil started me thinking as she said 'this'll be a girl' and I felt that too to which she said 'you'll end up with three girls'. And I thought hmmm maybe she's right but I've got so many friends from all girl groups and the dynamics within them are def affected.

mumeeee Sat 02-Jul-11 15:24:49

I have 3 girls. They are now 19 . 21 and 24 and they all get on. When they were children it seemed to vary who they would play with sometimes it was the older 2 sometimes the younger ones and sometimes all 3 of them. The 21 year old does seem to have the least confidence. Although she is a Drama student at Unu.

WaitingForBabyD Fri 08-Jul-11 12:21:36

In short, no.
I’m the middle of 3 girls (now late 20s / early 30s). Yes we sometimes argued as children (which siblings don’t?) but never over anything serious and never for long. Of course there were times when I played with the just my youngest sister, or just my eldest, but then we all played together too and had plenty of other friends to play with as well. We are all relatively different personality types and have always had different interests but we get on really well, and have done for as long as I can remember.
IMO the myths about 3 siblings are generally that, as long as everyone is treated fairly and as individuals where’s the problem?

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