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(11 Posts)
Dlah Sun 25-Sep-16 17:45:03

So I'll try and keep a long story short.

4 weeks away from having first child with my partner of 18 months.

Whilst he already owns a house outright (his parents bought for him 4 years ago) I've been renting for years and he's now living with me as we lived in separate counties.

We wanted to buy but neither had savings, his parents offered to gift us a very very very generous 80k. It was going to be on the basis I'd sign something to say if we ever split up and sold house, they'd get 80k back before we shared whatever was left.

Queue today, they've been to see their solicitor and said they don't want me to sign anything now, they trust me and even solicitor said it could cause an issue if mortgage lender thinks they have an interest - which day to day they wouldn't. I was completely humbled by this and know I have no intentions of ever taking money away from them.

My OH however had an immediate face on him and since leaving has said he's not happy, their stupid. I'm more upset that they've been so lovely to show their trust yet not feels like OH is saying doesn't trust me. Hormones probably playing a part in this!

I feel like he's more worried about his inheritance deep down, which frustrates me as I'm not a money grabber (he didn't tell me until after pregnant that he even owned his other house etc, and he's on a lesser paid job than me so money has never been in the equation with our relationship)

So down to it - anyone knowing of how the TR1 form works and if it's easy to get it declared that OH is bringing (albeit from his parents) more to the table for this house?

I just felt like saying sod it, I'll stay renting, I don't want the money

Sad and hormonal

specialsubject Sun 25-Sep-16 20:29:40

Any reason you cant buy the house in your name only?

Something about this worries me. Why not an adult discussion rather than 'a face'?

wowbutter Sun 25-Sep-16 20:30:59

He sounds horrible.

swissy56 Sun 25-Sep-16 20:40:49

I think if you have a child together he needs to accept that the money is going be split between you.

busyboysmum Sun 25-Sep-16 20:46:23

You can draw up a trust deed saying he is putting in more than you. Then hold as tenants in common and specify the shares in the tr1.

It's really common. Your solicitor will easily be able to draft the deed.

busyboysmum Sun 25-Sep-16 20:48:42

OhTheRoses Sun 25-Sep-16 20:49:56

Agree with busyboysmum. Did just that when we bought his first, my second house. Had a pre-nup too.

Dlah Sun 25-Sep-16 21:14:54

Couldn't buy it in my name alone as I have no deposit and my wage alone wouldn't allow for it. Plus I/we want it as a joint venture, just frustrating and very much hormonal influenced in my upset right now.

ImperialBlether Sun 25-Sep-16 21:17:48

Hang on, if you're having it in writing that he's bringing more to the table, then don't forget to get a mention that you earn more, so you are, too!

Leopard12 Sun 25-Sep-16 21:30:19

If he has a house in another country would it not make sense to sell that to get some money towards your together house? ( still be his money not shared but at least he won't feel your in debt to his parents?)

Dlah Sun 25-Sep-16 21:51:18

Just counties not countries - but wanted to keep his first house as investment. Tbf that doesn't bother me - was his before me and I'd be happy for him to keep it if there was ever an after me.

Whilst I do earn more (although will be on SMP shortly) we have agreed to put joint bill money into account and keep whatever's left as our own spending, so all bills and babies needs are met but we can still have a little freedom in our own purchases outside the joint account

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