My Ivf journey and the Czech Republic(1 Post)
Don't know if this is the 'done thing' but wanted to share my journey to give hope to anyone who needs it during this crap time.
I was 23 and hubby was 28. We started ttc in June 2013. Had all tests, tubes checks, laparoscopy, SA and it came back hubby has low sperm count and 'something wasn't quite right with my left tube'. Started Ivf in September 2014. First cycle ended up in a SET splitting into triplets, I lost all at 8w4d. That time in my life is a blur. I had to have a d&c as I wouldn't have passed them all myself. I don't remember feelings or anything, it's odd. We had two embryos frozen so went back for them in feb 2015, one didn't thaw and the other had a 20% chance - BFN. So tactics changed, we were out of the nhs funding then but they did offer me a selective salpingography. Which we did in July 2016. No problems found with my tubes but really on reflection it didn't change much having that done anyway. Decided we've got to try again privately. And also we were going abroad, we had to for cost and science. The Czech Republic had amazing fertility science, the drugs, the proctors etc are a trillion times better, so not even knowing where it was on a map, off we went in September 2016 to live there for a month. Got there and it's like chalk and cheese to the uk. They are so good, I was happy with the choice and walked out the clinic feeling great. They knew their stuff that's for sure. Anyway two days before my transfer my ovary twisted and the pain was out of this world. My left side of my body was shutting down within hours, morphine and painkiller injections weren't touching it, I was in serious trouble and loosing my life painfully. The doctors rushed me for a emergency laparoscopy and my thought was I would rather be dead than that pain. When the anaesthetic worked I just remembered how good it felt. These surgeons knew I was English, from my looks and name so didn't communicate well. But I got the picture loud and clear that they were taking the ovary out. Miraculously they didn't, they managed to get blood flowing and save it. Although the surgery report is in Czech when you translate it it actually says that it was black and when it turned started going to purple, red, pink etc and the blood flow returned, it's complete with pictures!! I had no pain, was great 👍🏻 however they cancelled my transfer and chose the best embryos to freeze. I had 43 collected, chose to use 24 and had 21 day 5 blasts. In Czech though they only freeze the best of the best, they are super picky and don't freeze anything less than grade 2AA. They got 6. I was gutted really, only 6 out of 21 were any good. We had 3 expanding grade 1AA, 1 x 1AA blast and 2 x 2AA expanding blasts. Thinking about it though to say I'm not a donor or anything in quite proud of that result. We left Czech (and our embryos) in tears almost. That plane taking off but knowing my embryos were there was a strange feeling. Knowing that I was hours away from coming home in a body bag was scary, I can't even thank the surgery team, I don't know their names and wouldn't even be able to say them. But they literally saved my life. So November 2016 we went back for a frozen cycle and transferred 2 x 1AA expanding blasts. Lots of bleeding but we had a healthy baby boy in July 2017. I thanked him when he was born for implanting and told him that I had done my best whilst I was pregnant with him and I would never let him down. I felt instant love and every feeling of heartbreak, depression and just pure shit went. 4 years of tears, surgery etc but it was all worth it. So we concentrated on raising our baby. Nov 2018 we had a surprise bfp. A BIG surprise, hubby's count was 'very normal' and we had to start thinking about contraception. I wanted to laugh my head off, yeah right-o but the doctor was serious. We used condoms and then decided actually we were ready for another baby so ditched them ASAP. Nothing happened so in feb 2019 we went back to Czech. We transferred 1 x 1AA expanding blastocyst and 1 x 1AA blast. Both took and after MORE bleeding, a relatively good pregnancy in regards to complications other than back pain etc we had two baby girls in Oct 2019. We were in hospital for 9 days and it was dark times. I cried every night for my son and just wanted to be home. We finally got discharged and the real work began!!! The girls were still teeny but packing on pounds and meeting milestones, my son was turning into more of a terrible two now these two babies had come along and changed his life!!! But we settled of course and into our little routine we fell. Going shopping or walking etc is an 'ordeal' at times. We've been stopped as many as 31 times in a shopping centre, people looking and complimenting my children which I don't mind, it's lovely but I find myself putting on this smile and saying Thankyou but feeling awful as I have said it 20 time earlier 😂😂😂 I wonder how genuine I look when really I just want to get my bits and bobs done and try to find the chocolate aisle!! Anyway my son loves his sisters - to a fashion. On his terms of course and although they aren't identical he knows the difference - I don't know why I'm surprised by that really as he does live with them 🙈 anyway so 7 years on and in between a MMC, failed cycle, a twisted ovary, natural miscarriage, I am a mummy. My children are everything to me and I love (sometimes) tripping over toys I never thought would grace my house. We have donated our other embryos to science, we have a four bed house and if we had twins again we would struggle for space. We are comfy in our little house, finances are good and we can afford luxuries and exotic holidays and with another baby or two I don't think we could so although my heart hated it my head knew it was the right thing to do. Now hubby needs a vasectomy and I can't wait, I can't wait just for him to have a 'procedure' I think!
Anyway hope is what I'm trying to give and to all those people who struggle to self fund really think about abroad, it's much cheaper and success rates are much higher. Hubby said to me, his exact words.."it doesn't matter how much stuff you print off or we talk about it Kym, we aren't going and that's final. Without me you won't be able to anyway as you won't have my sperm" Now I mock him for saying "we aren't going and that's final" he just reminds me that least he's knows they are his children - cheeky twat!!! I call him the slag and he calls (and probably gets off on it) a manipulating hot lesbian. We both chuckle as I always get my own way but this time it paid off big time. The sleepless nights, tantrums and poo in weird places is great and reminds me yep this is being a mummy. I'm sorry to ramble but to everyone who is going through infertility, never give up, ever. It's something that has changed my life and will always be with me but I was dealt that card so I had to play it in life. Honestly don't ever give up and don't be afraid to change your approach if it's not working. Never give up that hope of being able to moan about back ache whilst secretly loving every moment of it. Hopefully this has killed some lockdown time and that happy endings are out there! I hope everyone wins their golden ticket to parenthood, baby dust to all and keep your legs open during lockdown as you never know what could happen 😘😘😘 xxxxxxxx
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