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Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Infertility

Starting to accept it won't happen

2 replies

Everycloud12 · 04/03/2020 22:36

Is anyone else coming to the realisation that they'll never have a child?

16 years, numerous IVFs and 3 miscarriages later and I think I'm ready to throw in the towel.

I can't bear it though. I don't think I'm coping.

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Wintersun13 · 05/03/2020 19:17

I have no advice, just a hug.

You're the only one who can know when the time to stop is. I guess that would be when the thought of moving on becomes a relief rather than being painful.

Don't rush the decision. Maybe give yourself a break ? It doesn't have to be very long, a few days, a couple of weeks, three months. However much time you need.

You may find that you never get back on the IVF train. Conversely, this time may give you some distance to realize that you still want to give it a go. Either way, it should give you a rest and more clarity to think about it all.

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Wintersun13 · 05/03/2020 19:22

Fwiw I don't think the pain of not having children ever goes away - but I do think it dulls with time. Like any other grief. It will always be with you, but it will become more bearable.

I know this is easier said than done but try to focus on the good things in your life ? Hobbies, friends, travel. Try to focus on what you have, rather than what you don't have.

But I appreciate this is hard and probably doesn't feel all that helpful right now.

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