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Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Infertility

Christmas Card

11 replies

pinacollama · 07/12/2019 12:28

I don’t think there’s any purpose to this thread apart from me needing to vent. Just received a Christmas card from a friend, signed from the bloody bump. We’ve had so many chats about how much I’m struggling emotionally at the moment, I’ve told her I’ve muted friends on FB and Instagram who are pregnant just to help (including her!). It seems really insensitive. Fine if she wants to write it to others, but I would have thought she’d think a bit more. Ahhhh. I wish I didn’t feel like this- I want to be able to be excited and happy for my friends.

OP posts:
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Softscoop35 · 07/12/2019 12:37

I feel you, id be feeling the same.

I have a work colleague who is 12 weeks (who is actually sitting next to me on break as i type). I had a chemical pregnancy 3 weeks ago so we would have been 5 weeks apart (ive known of her pregnancy since her BFP) and im finding it difficult. Especially as she has mornin sickness and has, on occasion, moaned about it. She knows fully about my situation but she isnt malicious, she just isnt thinking.

However, i remember how excited i was with my DS and its pretty important for me that she doesnt feel awkward and she can openingly be excited about her pregnancy so i am going to have to keep my feelings to myself, take each day as it comes and vent to OH is need be.

Its hard, but she wont be pregnant forever. X

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Lalla525 · 07/12/2019 13:09

Totally feel your pain. I've closed myself in a safe bubble since I discovered we have MFI and avoided to talk to one of my friend at work until it was her last day before maternity leave.

People tend sometimes to forget others' struggles and your friend probably did not think it through.

I guess - everytime something like this happens - we should allow ourselves the time to regroup and the kindness to be slightly less tough with ourselves. In one of those day - I think I would watch a movie, eat some chocolate, do some pc games and wait to go to bed to start a new day.

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JacquesHammer · 07/12/2019 13:10

Massively insensitive. I’m sorry she has let you down like that Flowers

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Youngatheart00 · 08/12/2019 19:38

That made me Hmm total eye roll and get angry all at once.

Outside of immediate (eg partner) why anyone needs to sign anything from “bump” is beyond me, but especially insensitive to send to you. I’d be distancing myself in your shoes.

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juneybean · 08/12/2019 19:41

So so so insensitive! There's just no need for it Sad

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PurpleDaisies · 08/12/2019 21:11

I agree, she’s been really insensitive. I’d chuck it in the bin. It’s amazing how often this seems to happen. Flowers

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JandL2020 · 08/12/2019 21:15

Similar thing happened to me. Got sent a “just fat” digital test pic as a joke from so called friend. Didn’t find it funny at all! X

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FingersXssd83 · 09/12/2019 07:36

Very insensitive but many people are self-focussed. Throw it in the bin and mute her on social media 💕

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BeaCat · 09/12/2019 07:42

I bet it's not just you who is thinking WTF?! Even before I was ttc I would have thought it was very strange if someone signed a card from "the bump"!

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EL8888 · 09/12/2019 12:10

Very insensitive. I would say one of the worst parts of infertility issues are other people’s stupid comments, questions and actions. Plus it’s very writing that in a card. Who does that?!

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Chirpychirpy3 · 09/12/2019 17:27

That’s so insensitive and weird! Throw it in the bin xxx

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