How are YOU (not) coping with infertility?

(14 Posts)
TheBeesKnee Thu 07-Nov-19 21:08:07

I have realised that I buy a plant or 2 each month after I get my period. The house is starting to look like a jungle.

I also have gotten porky from comfort eating quite a bit.

Please tell me I'm not alone and share your "coping strategies"

OP’s posts: |
Steenac7 Thu 07-Nov-19 21:42:49

I’ve definitely put on a lot of weight! Ironically I now look pregnant as I carry it all on my stomach! blush I’ve also Signed up to a beauty box that arrives every month and I keep overbuying beauty bits which I then don’t use because I’m too lazy confused

TheBeesKnee Thu 07-Nov-19 21:49:32


Oh Jesus, I signed up for clothes boxes blush and I've not worn makeup in months because I just think what is the point?

OP’s posts: |
TheBeesKnee Thu 07-Nov-19 21:50:23

Oops, posted too soon. How long has it been for you? I'm 13 months in over here and trying to use reverse psychology on my womb about unlucky number 13...

OP’s posts: |
Millie20202 Thu 07-Nov-19 21:54:07

🙋🏼‍♀️Also gained weight from comfort eating.
Also spend unnecessarily on makeup and crap I don’t need. I don’t think I’d call it coping but surviving tbh lol. Feel like I’m on autopilot some days.
How long have you been ttc?

summ3r2 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:03:33

I eat to comfort myself as I feel sad and sorry for myself. 7 years ttc and I am truly exhausted. I think about giving up most days. I have depression caused by infertility and anxiety. Starting my 4th go of therapy next week. Guess I’m not coping well. Because of my comfort eating I now need to lose about 2 stone before we can start clomid. My age is also against me now, 38! So depending on how long it takes me to shed the pounds I may end up too old for anything other than ivf and then I can on have 1 round if I am in my 40s. They said in your 40s your chances are so low they only let you have 1 go. And we would have to pay as other half has a son. Oh the world is a cruel place isn’t it. Sending love and baby dust to us all xx

Steenac7 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:08:58

I didn’t know clothes boxes existed... this could be dangerous for me blush trying 2 years this month! We’ve both given up ok it happening naturally so focusing more now on hoping IVF will work ( one failed round). So we don’t have the two week wait etc anymore which helps as it was all consuming!!!

Have you tried any IVF yet or still naturally!?


Steenac7 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:12:28

@Millie20202 definitely feel on auto pilot. I feel totally fine most of the time then someone announced a pregnancy and I just burst out crying. Suppressing your feelings for the win!! sad how long have you been trying?

@summ3r2 sorry to hear you are dealing with depression and anxiety. It’s very hard. I definitely am getting more anxious. I’m in Ireland and we have to pay here too.

Have you looked into any diets for losing weight? Something like slimming world could help as it’s a social outlet too?

I’m torn between slimming world and calorie counting. I don’t want to put on any more weight and need to motivate myself to loose.

summ3r2 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:42:03

I tried slimming world and loosely trying weight watchers at the mo. Can’t get my head in the game.. Give into temptation all the time. Having a good few weeks but not as good as I should have been. I get married in 6 months and ordered a smaller size in my dress to try and motivate me. So I know I need to get in the dress. Hopefully I will get there xxx

Maisy24 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:42:02


TTC #1 for 15 months (feels like forever)

@TheBeesKnee I am constantly booking holidays and trips even though we can't really afford it. But it takes my mind off ttc and all things pregnancy related!

Also put weight on this past year so I'm on a diet currently (virtually impossible in the run up to Xmas) but it will make me feel better in myself as I get even more down when I put weight.

@Steenac7 @Millie20202 🙋🏼‍♀️also buy unnecessary make up and household things I do not need.

@summ3r2 so sorry it's been a long journey. why don't you try and focus on one thing at a time. Focus on the gym and eating healthier and it will make you feel better all round, it will take your mind of ttc and will help towards the ivf goal once you get there. 38 isn't old! You have time try to stop thinking you are against a clock as long as you are having periods it can happen!

@Steenac7 why have you given up that it will happen naturally? Have you had a diagnosis or anything? Never give up it can still happen some people can take many years to conceive.


summ3r2 Thu 07-Nov-19 22:45:31

@Millie20202 yes I think you are right. I’m balancing too many plates and everything falls back to ttc. I always think about how much time we have left and that’s what makes me feel like crap. Like not being able to sleep and keep checking the clock and counting down the hours until you have to get up! I need to try and forget about ttc for now and focus on being healthy. I joined the gym but never go so will get back to that. Thank you xxx

AvaMercy Fri 08-Nov-19 00:59:44

Another excessive plant purchaser here!! There is a really good plant shop quite close to the hospital that I used to have my ovulation induction and at one point I was going there almost after every appointment I was so stressed out by the whole thing! Have moved onto ivf now so different hospital and less appointments. Still do love a pick me up plant purchase though...

I’ve also struggled with weight and comfort eating. Had to lose a bit in order to lower my bmi before starting ivf. Started jogging (couch to 5k app is brill) and doing a bit of slimming world (without actually joining sliming world) and both really helped. I’m still not the weight I was before I started all of these infertility treatments but I’m at least feeling like I’m a bit more in control of my weight and body which is helping. Urgh, infertility is just the worst isn’t it?!

Lalla525 Fri 08-Nov-19 06:42:07

Comfort eating here : pizza every friday and indian every saturday.

Weight gain made me feel so unattractive that even having sex has become less and less pleasant.

Good luck to everybody here - I'm one of those thinking that having babies is a right and that life is really unfair sometimes. flowers

Steenac7 Fri 08-Nov-19 09:41:58

@Maisy24 yes DH has very low sperm count, poor on mobility motility etc and very high DNA fragmentation so chances of it happening naturally are pretty much non existent and if it did high chance of miscarriage so while we still try every month there’s no expectation there of it working. We’re focusing on IVF as how we’ll get a baby hopefully!

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