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I need some uplifting advice, mmc, age, infertility etc

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nisha7780 Tue 03-Sep-19 21:35:48

2019 at 9.00PM (Online in the category Fertility problems of the forum Netmums)editQuick editansweranswer +Favorites
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Hi everyone
I suppose I’m just looking for some encouraging stories that all is not lost.
A bit of background to see if anyone had been in the same boat or similar.

I fell pregnant whilst on the pill 2015, only found out when I went to hospital for suspected gall stones, (big shock) now I have an amazing 3.5 year old little boy who I adore he was born via c section. But apart from that I was 35yo and had a problem free pregnancy (was smoking/drinking for the first 7 weeks I didn’t know I was PG).
Fast forward to Aug 17 we decide to try for no2.
Got pregnant sept 17 and here’s me so smug I must be so fertile, didn’t realize at first (as I was not expecting to fall so quick) went for 12 week scan (on my own husband was working away) to be told, no heartbeat, I had a mmc at 8 weeks, I waited 2 weeks to see if baby would come away natural (worst 2 weeks of my life) unfortunately baba didn’t want to leave so had to have medical management.
Forward 2 weeks after that I got a terrible infection and had to be taken into hospital on anti biotics.

So I’m thinking ok these things happen, let’s try again I’m fertile enough.
Fast fast forward, so no pregnancy I’m now 38 and it’s sept 18 and I start to get horrendous pains, long story short I have a strangulated hernia had to have an emergency operation they think it could have been caused by weakening due to c section
Had a horrible wait of 3 months before we could TTC (I just wanted this baby so much) so got on the horse again dec 18 and 27th Jan this year got the BFP, I was leaving for Canada to visit family 1st feb (so didn’t make any appointments until I was due back) 2nd day of holiday massive bleed that lasted the whole 2 weeks, I knew what had happened. Long story short unfortunately I had some remnants left and had to go down the vacuum route with this miscarriage to clear.

I’ve now just had my 39th birthday and had 3 clear months of TTC with no joy
Also the last AF is the first in my life ever that has been unusual (I’m usually text book)
I had 4 days of spotting (was hoping it was implantation) then 2 days of full AF then a clear day (nothing) to an almighty gush at 10pm last night for 1 hour and today nothing again.

We have got a referral letter to a private clinic to see if we can find out anything but of course it’s still within NHS so it’s been 2 weeks and I’ve not heard anything and time is cracking on and I’ve also bought a clear blue fertility monitor to start using as I’ve heard some good reports.

I suppose I’m just wanting to hear if anyone else has had some similar issues ie age/miscarriage etc anything to do with my story that they can give me some hope or encouragement to not fall into this deep depression that’s starting to hit.
I just so desperately want another baby and don’t want to loose hope yet
But I’m now convinced all these things are bad things
Unusual period - I’m pre menopause or I have something horrible like endometriosis
Age- I’m too old to do it natural
C section- have they damaged me and I will never carry another baby
Etc etc unfortunately I can’t keep all these bad scenarios out of my head at the moment

So thank you so much for listening to me rant on, I’m sorry but I think I just needed to vent.
Any advice etc will be greatly appreciated
Everyone around me is pregnant at the min and it’s awful having to excuse yourself to go and cry in the loo when you so desperately want to be happy for them

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