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36 and IVF my only option. Have I left it too late? Worried.

(13 Posts)
Youngatheart00 Tue 13-Aug-19 22:55:59

I’ve NC for this post but am a regular mumsnet poster.

Had a total salpingectomy last year and it’s taken me some time to come to terms with it (they had only anticipated removing one tube). As a result I delayed an NHS funded cycle but after some counselling and the passage of time, now feel ready to proceed.

When we were first referred for fertility treatment I was 34, I’ve now just turned 36. Will they ask me to repeat all of my tests? I’m really really worried about the results - as I’m older and I’ve also heard the lack of tubes reduce blood supply to the ovaries. My DH has no issues. Will they ask him to repeat his tests?

Im angry at myself for not taking the chance 9 months ago - if I had, I could be just about to give birth! But I just didn’t feel ready. Physically or emotionally. I drank heavily over Christmas and basically went off the rails a little. My lifestyle is a lot more healthy now and I’m finding myself ‘nesting’ I suppose and being much more of a homebody. I’ve reduced alcohol consumption to around 3 glasses per week and am taking pre pregnancy supplements. My BMI is also now in the healthy range.

Honest thoughts on the above or any words of wisdom from anyone who’s been in a similar position would be appreciated.

physicskate Tue 13-Aug-19 23:18:34

Lack of tubes is what ivf was specifically created for, so it's no t correct to say it has an effect on the outcome.

It's hard to say about the tests, they may want some or all repeated, as they like to have had them done within the last year, mostly.

It's totally fine that you weren't ready then. Infertility is literally the worst thing that happens to most people. It takes time to grieve and heal.

I wish you the best of luck.

Youngatheart00 Tue 13-Aug-19 23:28:40

Thank you @physicskate

I hadn’t realised that about tubes. I guess that’s reassuring, in some way. I suppose I’m just worried about the tests which will now have nearly 18 months between them.

I only get one funded cycle too so there’s a lot resting on this.

Sulamma Tue 13-Aug-19 23:55:25

I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. Just to offer some hope, I suffered repeated ectopics and had IVF aged 38. It worked first time and I now have a wonderful 4 year old daughter. I don't think there is any conclusive evidence that a salpingectomy affects ovarian reserve, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. I definitely don't think you've left it too late. I wish you all the best of luck.

Blankspace4 Wed 14-Aug-19 07:30:58

Thank you SO much for your positive story @Sulamma ❤️

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted Wed 14-Aug-19 07:34:04

Yes they'll likely make you have all the tests done again as a lot can change in 2 years

I've got no tubes left either - left removed last year due to ectopic and the right removed last month due to ectopic - I start second round of ivf next month and ivf clinic aren't concerned about diminished ovarian response - in fact when I had my first round my tubeless side at the time responded better as surgery had left my ovary closer to a blood supply

applecrumbl3 Wed 14-Aug-19 08:59:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LillyLeaf Wed 14-Aug-19 10:30:42

I'm 36, it seems quite a common age on these boards. My doctor keeps saying I'm still 'young'. Good luck

Youngatheart00 Wed 14-Aug-19 10:49:03

Thank you so so much all of you for your encouraging words. It helps so much to not feel so alone. It feels as if everyone in my life - family, friends, colleagues have had such an effortless route (although I know I clearly won’t know what happens behind the scenes) and I’ve been feeling very isolated. These boards will be a great help I think.

@applecrumbl3 everything crossed and positive vibes for you and your IVF cycle x

applecrumbl3 Wed 14-Aug-19 11:11:16

It does seem like that sometimes I agree. My best friend seemingly just has to look at her husband, and my sister in law has just got pregnant with her third! I know they were a bit nervous about telling us. But everyone's path in life is different and this is just one aspect. Important thing is to try to keep perspective, do what you can to improve your chances without letting it completely consume your every waking thought!

applecrumbl3 Wed 14-Aug-19 11:14:28

For every success story there are also many (often untold) trials behind the scenes as well. I have been really open with friends about all of this which I think is quite unusual, and my husband has not been so much. To be honest it's been really nice to have people's support IRL, though I appreciate it's not for everyone. My single friends are fascinated and I'm now telling them all to go and get checked and think about putting some eggs on ice, because even if they meet someone soon, having a second (or third if they're that way inclined) may not be so easy in a few years time. I've also been amazed how many stories of miscarriage and other problems have come out since I've started confiding in people. Try it, you might like it smile

Youngatheart00 Thu 15-Aug-19 09:51:57

Had a reassuring hospital appointment yesterday. Based on an ultrasound, it wouldn’t appear things have deteriorated and she could see a number of follicles, and ovaries in a ‘good’ place (I didn’t realise there was a bad!!). Now need to repeat blood tests I originally had in 2017.

Sylva123 Mon 26-Aug-19 09:14:10

@Youngatheart00 I'm also 36 and sharing your anxiety, but will say that we managed to get all of our blood tests, scans etc done within about 4-6 weeks so you might get lucky and get everything done quickly. I also had to repeat mine from last year and was worried it would take forever, but it was ok.

My Doc's keep saying I'm still young and have time and we're looking at IVF in January (once I've had an operation).

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