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Starting the journey thread 2

(1000 Posts)
squirrelnutkins1 Tue 14-May-19 21:27:32

So we're nearly at 1000 posts.... setting this up ready for round 2 when the other is full.

I've tagged all the regulars I think (please forgive me if not ❤️❤️❤️) and anyone else who has commented on the thread ever if you'd like to come back and fill us in!

Here's to support and success 🎉💐



VenusStarr Sat 27-Jul-19 09:13:42

Thanks @veeboo. My counsellor said to try not to add meaning to things, but it's hard. My work gave me a lovely orchid after the miscarriage, fully in bloom. Then last month all the flowers started drying up and dying. I've only got 2 left now. I had thought that maybe it was because I was pregnant and it was signalling the start of something new. But it's not. I don't know if this is anxiety or what, but I know it's not that normal and it doesn't even bring me comfort or hope. It's weird how my brain is working at the moment 😔

Glad you're in your tww now. Hopefully in a couple of weeks you'll get some happy news 🤞 x

veeboo Sat 27-Jul-19 09:48:20

I'm glad you're seeing a counsellor @VenusStarr. It's really tough for us because we cannot see what's going on in our bodies so we look for signs. I hope the rest of your tww passes quickly. Xx

squirrelnutkins1 Sat 27-Jul-19 10:00:48

@VenusStarr I don't think I can put myself through it. I'm holding back the tears trying to be strong. We're out for the day so trying to be good company 🙈
That's really hard hun. It's hard not to assign meaning to things but I can see why we do it. I've been dreaming about having a dd this week 💔 lots of love xx

Urgh just at the pub for breakfast and literally just heard a guy talking about one of his mates having 4 kids to 3 different women 🙄

How are you today? @GreyC

@veeboo we're all doing our best aren't we wether that's self insemination or otherwise 👍🏻

VenusStarr Sat 27-Jul-19 10:23:20

@squirrelnutkins1 💔 hopefully it happens for us all on this thread xx
Sorry you're feeling tearful, and having to listen to that dickhead!! Enjoy your breakfast and your day 😊

Thanks @veeboo. I think I just dint trust my body anymore, it's doing all the right things but something isn't working. Plus with the miscarriage my body didn't recognise the baby wasn't developing so made me think all was OK 😔 hope your tww passes quickly too x

What a difference a couple of days makes! It's absolutely pouring down here ☔

veeboo Sat 27-Jul-19 10:38:04

@VenusStarr I think we can all relate to that feeling. You're not alone

VenusStarr Sat 27-Jul-19 10:50:59

💜 @veeboo x

CloudSway Sat 27-Jul-19 16:10:04

@GreyC you are absolutely justified in your reaction, I would be so irritated! It's one of the few things men can take ownership of, everything else involves us so to not do something so simple must feel like a kick in the teeth. Make sure you talk about it so he understands, try not to go to sleep angry

@VenusStarr it's really hard not to look for something, anything, that might be a sign, especially if you dont get much info from your body. I'm the same, I don't even get a sign my af is coming so every month I start to convince myself.. Just try not to let yourself be convinced by anything except hard evidence, otherwise it can make it even harder on yourself. If you feel your body doesn't let you know about things, there's just as much chance that it could be a bfp as there is that it it could be a bfn right? I'm sorry it's so difficult xx

CloudSway Sat 27-Jul-19 16:13:57

@squirrelnutkins1 god what a prat 🤬 it's just unfair. Sorry you're having a tough day, sometimes company helps and sometimes it's the absolute last thing you need. Thinking of you xx

GreyC Sat 27-Jul-19 20:29:18

Hi ladies;
Spoke to him this morning as I had a bath then went straight to sleep because he was all defensive. Spoke this morning and I said that considering I have to not only take the drugs and such things but then (much wanted) be pregnant and give birth a vitamin isn’t that hard.
He has taken it today and I’ve basically said that I’m not willing to go through with it unless he is willing to do such a small things as we get once chance for this to work. I’m taking DHEA which I don’t want to take but I am so I can say to myself I am doing everything!
He was more understanding this morning so hopefully it will continue l. Thanks for thinking of me 💕

veeboo Sat 27-Jul-19 21:00:24

Well done @GreyC for standing your ground. For what it's worth I think you're absolutely right and fair to do so. I had a similar conversation with my partner about his approach to his ED. Not comfortable at all but it worked. Hope he fixes up and also that he starts to feel better!

veeboo Sat 27-Jul-19 21:02:42

P.S I am also having a chinese this eve! X

GreyC Sat 27-Jul-19 21:21:43

Thanks @veeboo sometimes they think they can be ignorant to it but you can’t; it’s goif to happen etc.
Yasss enjoy your chinese!!! We had a cheeky BBQ as my best friend came over smile luckily there was a few hours break from the rain to do it.

squirrelnutkins1 Sat 27-Jul-19 21:29:11

Thanks for your support girls @VenusStarr @CloudSway we had a nice day even tho it rained for most of it! Feeling ok now, managed not to cry and what will be will be. I'm not out til AF sings!

@GreyC glad you've had a good chat and smoothed things over. Xxx

@veeboo enjoy your Chinese! I've been a right pig day and loved it!

Kelly199 Sun 28-Jul-19 09:35:46

Sorry ladies, I know I've missed loads and I'm not going to be able to catch up completely, but I'll catch up on most recent. Hope you're all ok. Been thinking of you all.

@veeboo happy belated anniversary!! Hope you had a lovely day xx

@squirrelnutkins1 hope you will have your bfp!! I have taken a break this month from clomid. So disappointing every month when nothing happening. I think this month I'll be more relaxed and as I'm not expecting anything now that I haven't taken the clomid, I won't be so upset seeing af!
So annoying hearing things like that isn't it?? Hope you're ok xx

@2fingers22018 when is your next appt? Getting closer and closer, so pleased for you!! 🤞🏼 xx

@GreyC so sorry about your dp!! That is so frustrating!! I'm glad he's listened to you now and hopefully he'll take them regularly now. Hope you're ok xx

@VenusStarr have my fingers crossed for you. Still early on yet. Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised with happy news!! 🤞🏼😘
Sorry you're struggling and sorry for your loss. Lovely that work gave you an orchid.
Sending lots of hugs xx

@CloudSway hope you're doing ok xx

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF thinking of you. Hope you're ok ❤️

Hope everyone else is ok xx

Can I ask a question to those who have gone through ivf or are going through it (you don't have to answer if you'd prefer not to) - what are the injections called that you have to use?

VenusStarr Sun 28-Jul-19 10:02:46

Good to hear from you @Kelly199. Good that you've had a month off, it can feel overwhelming at times. If this cycle isn't successful I've got to have a month off because of the hysteroscopy. In some ways I think it will help.

@squirrelnutkins1 how are you today? Hope there's no sign of af ❤️

@GreyC glad you've had a good chat about things xx

@2fingers22018 How's things with you?

Thank you @CloudSway

We had Chinese last night, feel very piggy 🐽 but it was good 😊 halfway through my tww. Really tying not to read into my bbt chart (and failing!) were off out to meet my friend and meet her baby today. They live quite far away so although the baby is 6 months old I've not met her yet.

Have a good day everyone xx

veeboo Sun 28-Jul-19 10:55:18

Really good to hear from you @kelly199. I think months off are a good idea now and again. Hope everyone is doing okay. X

squirrelnutkins1 Sun 28-Jul-19 12:18:01

@VenusStarr I think AF will have arrived by the end of the day, my stomach is feeling quite tender but we'll see! If not I'll wait til after work tues to test I think.
Glad you enjoyed your takeaway. Hope it goes well with your friend. Xx

@Kelly199 thanks hun. Can't blame you for taking a break, plus everything else you've had going on from your last post I imagine ttc was the last thing on your mind. Any news on the job front? I'm feeling ok today thanks. I'm ready for af to arrive, mentally I mean and will try again next month. Just got to keep going haven't you.

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Sun 28-Jul-19 13:36:05

Morning all,

Sorry I haven’t been around much and haven’t had time to catch up!

@Kelly199 welcome back!! Was worried about you! Think you have to do what’s right for you and if that’s taking a break from clomid then do it! I’m good thankyou am fully recovered now I think and while it’s sad and disappointing what happened I’m ready to move forward! Meds I used were bemfola, cetrotide and then to trigger buserelin.

@GreyC sorry your oh is being a pain my dh is like that to and so when he starts messing around I’m like you either do it or I don’t its horrible to be like that but it has worked for me! Glad you’ve talked about it!

@squirrelnutkins1 sorry your struggling big hugs!

@veeboo happy belated Anniversary!

@VenusStarr sorry your struggling

Hope everyone else is ok xx

squirrelnutkins1 Sun 28-Jul-19 17:26:47

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF nice to hear from you. Glad you're doing as ok as possible xx

AF has arrived so hubby has just done the wine run 🙊 he came back with my fave chocs too 💕 so I'm having a pig out and wallow! Xx

GreyC Sun 28-Jul-19 17:27:57

Oh @squirrelnutkins1 I’m sorry. Well done of him for the much needed comfort food room!
Hope you are doing ok x

squirrelnutkins1 Sun 28-Jul-19 19:43:35

@GreyC I'm disappointed but it's hardly unexpected. He's a good egg bless him

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Sun 28-Jul-19 19:46:58

@squirrelnutkins1 sorry af got you! Be kind to yourself and am glad DH has been so thoughtful xx

veeboo Sun 28-Jul-19 20:44:07

Oh @@squirrelnutlins1 that sucks. Your DP sounds like a bloody legend though. Sending hugs.

squirrelnutkins1 Sun 28-Jul-19 21:04:41

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF @veeboo Thanks ladies. Really appreciate your support. I barely ever drink so it went to my head and I fell asleep 🙈 OH is def a goodun 💕
Hope the Sunday blues aren't hitting too hard xx

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Sun 28-Jul-19 21:08:07

@squirrelnutkins1 bless you I’ve had a few wines tonight and definitely gone to my head!! Not sure why Sunday funday and all that! smile

squirrelnutkins1 Sun 28-Jul-19 21:27:32

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF 🤣 xx

Kelly199 Mon 29-Jul-19 07:23:40

@squirrelnutkins1 sorry af arrived! So nice your dp is being kind to you. Just want we need at these times!!
I know. It has been a hard few weeks. My af arrived Tuesday, but I just knew it would arrive this month, so decided to take a break to try and relax with opks etc. Xx

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF definitely! It's so hard all the time isn't it. Hard decision knowing the tablets are sitting there, but just feel like I really need a break.
Glad you've recovered. Been thinking of you.
Thank you for the meds. I was just curious as to what it was that they give xx

Hope everyone is ok and has a lovely day! Sun is out, again!! I hate it. Roll on winter lol. I know I'll be in the minority by saying that 😂

VenusStarr Mon 29-Jul-19 17:57:32

Sorry to hear af arrived @squirrelnutkins1 ❤️ glad your oh has been looking after you though 😊

Having a month off sounds like a good plan @Kelly199. You got anything nice planned over the next few weeks? Can't believe you're wishing for winter!! 😳 Only joking, I love the autumn and being snug. That said, would be nice to have a couple of sunny weekends, particularly over my birthday at the end of August.

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF good to hear you're starting to feel a bit better.

8dpo today, not feeling hopeful at all. I have no desire to test early. Feeling quite indifferent to it all to be honest. I think it's a self-preservation thing - dreading my hysteroscopy in a couple of weeks. Going to see if the reflexologist can recommend anything or give me some calming tips xx

squirrelnutkins1 Mon 29-Jul-19 20:03:57

@VenusStarr @Kelly199 Thanks girls. He's def a keeper 😉
I'm soooo with you, I love being wrapped up and snuggly. I struggle with the summer as I'm in no way body confident. Im not overweight but I just hate my pale legs and big hips and just never feel I look nice 🙄 but I love being in a big coat jumper scarf and boots!

I think a break will do you good @Kelly199

I'm back on the Letrazole tomorrow. Phoned the clinic today and they said it worked last month so just take the next two months and I don't need to be monitored. They want me to just take it and try and forget about it (yeah right!) so I stay as relaxed as possible. Work doesn't help my stress levels so i need to find a way for it not to get to me. OH massively does too.

Enjoy your reflexology @VenusStarr let us know how it goes. I might book in again. We're trying to save money so will see if OH minds 🙊 xx

Kelly199 Tue 30-Jul-19 09:06:58

@VenusStarr definitely!! It's well needed!! I haven't got anything planned, but I am going to paint our bedroom and kitchen because I've been saying it for ages and just haven't done it!!
I love the winter. Summer is my least favourite. W, A, SP, SU. Weird order I know...
Fingers crossed for you. It's horrible waiting isn't it. Definitely would go. Anything is worth a try! Xx

@squirrelnutkins1 I'm exactly the same!! I tend to be covered up too and just love being in big coats and all the winter gear!!
Me too. I think I really need it especially at the moment!
I'm not even going to do opks either. I may do one just to see if I'm ovulating the same day as on the clomid just to see how my body is coping without, but that's it.
Hope you'll be ok on it this month. Been struggling with symptoms haven't you? Xx

Hope everyone is ok xx

squirrelnutkins1 Tue 30-Jul-19 17:53:52

Sounds like a good plan! @Kelly199 yeah last month I was soooooo tired and headachy. Had a three hour nap one weekend 😳 started again this morning and I've been ok tbh but I've been mental busy at work so maybe I've just not noticed any symptoms 🤣

How's everyone else? Xx

veeboo Tue 30-Jul-19 18:26:06

Good luck with your new cycle @squirrelnutkins1
Enjoy every second of the break too @kelly199. I'm 4dpo now. Have a wedding this weekend so I hope that will distract me. I'm going to try and not test. I have none in the house so that should help!

GreyC Tue 30-Jul-19 18:57:20

Fingers crossed for everyone waiting or in their new cycles.
I’m waiting for AF; which I no is on her way as despite the rain I am roasting! I always get really hot for some reason. Had to stop taking the DHEA as it was making me really really sick - which is why the small absence from here. I’m abit gutted but hopefully we will get some good eggs when it’s time for my IVF despite the slightly lower AMH.

I am making Thai green curry tonight from scratch so I am looking forward to eating it later on tonight and then probably go swimming around 9:30 ish to relax.

veeboo Tue 30-Jul-19 19:06:04

Hi @GreyC how are you feeling now? I love a thai curry!
Do you mind me asking, were your prescribed DHEA?

GreyC Tue 30-Jul-19 19:13:28

@veeboo yes the consultant said it was worth looking at but tbh; after researching if I was taking it still I would have only been on it for 5 weeks prior to egg collection so not really much point tbh! I’m trying to relax into it as I can be such a obsessive person and control everything but I know I need to be healthy for this.

Feeling fine now! Thankfully smile

2fingers22018 Tue 30-Jul-19 19:16:40

Hi luvely ladies! Tryin to catch up with everything had a great time in amsterdam just what we needed! @VenusStarr i 100% do the same thing taking everything as a sign i thought it was just me being crazy thanks for opening up and saying x im a big believer in fate and karma i think thats why @squirrelnutkins1 sorry bout af glad ur OH is such a legend @GreyC my OH does the same with vits sumtimes i think they think its just us askin them to take them and it wnt make a difference but its soo frustrating @Kelly199 soo glad to c u bak hugs ur always soo positive i hope ur feeling better! @veeboo and @CloudsSway 👋 hi to everyone else where is everyone with their treatments atm?💗

veeboo Tue 30-Jul-19 19:19:57

Thanks @ GreyC I've read about it but wasnt sure hoe to get it. I assume it would come up during IVF prep?

GreyC Tue 30-Jul-19 19:25:43

You can buy online they pointed me in the biovea website direction.

Yes it came up when we set the protocol for our ICSI

veeboo Tue 30-Jul-19 19:52:45

I didnt realise that. Thanks @GreyC!

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Tue 30-Jul-19 22:11:42

@Kelly199 I think what Ned you have can vary but those are the ones I used! Yes I know what you mean it has been nice break not to take any meds the last few weeks for me!

@VenusStarr thanks! I have everything crossed for you!

@GreyC oooh I love a green curry too!

@2fingers22018 glad you had a great break!

So I rang the clinic today and I have my consultation booked in for Thursday morning with my consultant to find out shat the plan is for my next fet excited and anxious. DH said we could take a break if I needed to but I think if I stop ill struggle to start it again so we are going to move forward with the next one!

veeboo Wed 31-Jul-19 06:24:58

Glad to hear from you @finallytakingtheplungewithivf. You are being so strong. Do what feels right! Thinking positive thoughts for us all today

VenusStarr Wed 31-Jul-19 07:08:20

Morning everyone. I'm feeling a bit down this morning, 10dpo and had a temperature drop. I'm just not feeling hopeful at all sad I might ask the reflexologist if she needs me to carry on with it after today. I think I'd rather be ignorant to what's going on and af turns up rather than seeing my temperature go down or testing and getting a bfn. Feeling a bit sorry for myself this morning. But, got reflexology, counselling and hopefully going to my yoga class - if I'm not self-cared out!

Sorry for the self-indulgent post. Hope you're all OK x

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 07:21:20

@veeboo thankyou it’s a hard decision to make I think but we want to carry on for now not sure how I’ll feel if another one fails but am trying to focus on the positives and think when we’ve gone through the plan I’ll be more focused even though I am going on holiday in a couple of weeks so need to try be healthy and active between now and then as hopefully af will arrive sometime around then but not sure if this cycle it will be all over the place!

@venuStarr sorry you are feeling down this morning! Hopefully your reflexology and Counselling will help xx

veeboo Wed 31-Jul-19 07:28:03

@VenusStarr dont apologise! You have just described the exact reason why I havent tried temping and my acupuncturist has asked me to as well. If it makes you stressed its counterproductive. I know it's easily said but try not to panic. Are you going to test or wait this month?
@finallytakingtheplungewithivf good news about holiday. That will be relaxing x

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 08:53:40

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF this is where ivf gets soo hard i think tryin to mentally gear up to do it all again fx for u this time hun stay strong x ive got my appt today and im bricking it im excited for the nxt one to get meds FINALLY but i dnt know why this one with all the paperwork scares me its making it all very real!

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 08:54:25

Where r u off to on ur hols?

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 10:23:35

@2fingers22018 oooohh how exciting for you! I suppose signing all the forms makes it more real! When do you start the meds? I think you nailed it saying this is where it gets hard gearing up to do it again at least it’s not the whole process and it’s jist the fet part not sure how I would feel about doing the whole process so soon!
We are going to Cyprus never been before!

@veeboo not as relaxing as I would like as have an exam the week after I get back so will be revising but at least it’s in the sun by a pool so not so bad lol!

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 13:32:28

You are amazing @FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF

@2fingers22018 I’m due on my period Friday and have to ring up to start my down regulation on day 21. What protocol are you having?

VenusStarr Wed 31-Jul-19 13:41:43

I'm back from reflexology. Feeling really flat. I'm definitely not pregnant this cycle sad my uterus is cold. Least I won't waste any tests.

She did say my left fallopian tube possibly has a kink. There was something else about my uterus but I can't remember.

She also went over dh's SA results and they aren't as OK as we were led to believe.

She also said that my body is holding onto a lot of tension, so if I'm stressed it's counterproductive to fertility.

My fsh was excellent and she wants me to carry on charting for 3 cycles, so I will see when af is due to arrive. Got a 4 week course booked for September.

I'm gutted sad glad I've got counselling later, feeling very emotional and tearful now 😥

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 13:52:21

Oh @venusstar
It’s ok to feel emotional and sad about these things. I am slowly learning that how ever I am feeling is ok. My acupuncture lady said I have a lot of tension too. Had a couple weeks off going because I simply can’t afford to shell out over £200 a month. So will hold off untill August now when I know when my treatment is.

My very best friend started trying on her honeymoon and she knows my struggles but I’m making sure I stay really up beat for her as it’s all exciting for her and such things even tho I would be insanely jealous if she got pregnant quickly! Or even could be pregnant now

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 13:59:57

Also - maybe ask for an appointment to discuss your DH analysis?

VenusStarr Wed 31-Jul-19 14:32:13

Thank you @GreyC. Dh doesn't really rate / believe in complementary therapy. I messaged him after I got out and said I had a lot to ponder on and he replied 'from a foot massage?' sad he feels that because we're under the hospital they'll find the issue and fix it. Feeling massively overwhelmed.

That must be hard to try and be upbeat for your friend. I'm not sure I could do that. Definitely not at the moment. X

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 15:28:33

Awww thankyou @GreyC ❤️ How exciting that you are also nearly ready to start! Sounds like you are on long protocol?

@VenusStarr sorry your appointment hasn’t helped! Just a question but how qualified is this person to be able to tell you about DH SA? Not suggesting they can’t was just curious that’s all! Hope your counselling goes ok xx

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 15:30:38

@veeboo I’m extremely lucky that my DP is really into spirituality: mediation and crystals etc. Although makes it hard sometimes as he believes in what will be will be and sometimes I want to moan about how unfair it is not always think positive.

Yes it’s quite difficult and I’m hoping she’s not pregnant from her first cycle - now how awful is that!!

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 15:31:39

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF yes Long protocol and I think max drugs to get all my little follicles to grow and mature smile)

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 15:50:19

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF thanks im gettin xcited aswell now they said my egg reserve blood levels (whatever u call it lol) are really high 40 sumthin im just nervous bout tellin my work now cause i ll need away for a lot of appts bloods scans etc just hoping their understandin they can b quite awkward a lot of the time..ooh cyprus sounds nice @GreyC they said protocol 1🤔dunno if thats short or long very confusing

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 16:03:42

@GreyC well hopefully I won’t be too far be hind you depending on when af shows and we will be on injections for some of the part together! Sounds like @2fingers22018 will be aswell be nice to have some injection buddies!

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 16:05:31

@2fingers22018 do you need to tell work? How far away is the clinic from work? But I guess it depends on when your appointments are so you get to choose times or do they just tell you? Do you know when in your cycle you’ll be starting it’s easier to work out if it’s long or short then I believe?

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 16:06:27

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF yh that sounds great need all the support we can get lol😊

CloudSway Wed 31-Jul-19 16:12:06

Hi guys, just have to pop on at work because I'm feeling very sorry for myself and there's no-one here today I feel I can talk to.

Someone just told me in strict confidence that she's pregnant, and even though she knows about me her main concern was when am I having ivf so we can come back on a work share after maternity leave..... on top of that I've lost my engagement ring, and I'm due on in the next couple of days which will no doubt be my 30th failed attempt. I'm normally pretty pragmatic, but I'm sitting in an office having a cry, and it just feels very lonely.

Pleased I can read something uplifting (Thanks for the update @2fingers22018!) and I'm sorry to the few of you struggling, it makes me feel that little bit less isolated knowing we've all had days like this xxx

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 16:14:49

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF yh sadly i dnt want to but because im nhs i just need to take whatever they can give me appt wise fx it works out alrite not gonna lie its stressing me out a bit dnt think theyl pay me if i take time off..they told me to fone the 1st day of my period my injections start day 2or3 of my cycle is that short?

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 16:17:23

@CloudsSway stay strong hun hugs as cheesy as it sounds we all know how u feel ive been there cryin in a loo at work its the pits but ur not alone x💗

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Wed 31-Jul-19 18:12:19

@Cloudsway oh no how insensitive of her!! I think I would of been a bit angry and would probably of said so! Big hugs to you xx

@2fingers22018 yes sounds like short to me as that’s what I had to do aswell! Yes it is a bit of pain if you just get told when your appointment is hopefully they won’t be to inconvenient! Couldn’t you just say you have so gynae issues not really a lie but sauces you from telling them about the ivf

veeboo Wed 31-Jul-19 19:16:08

@CloudSway that person sounds like an idiot. I hope you kindly told her where to go but if not let's work up some things you can say if she brings it up again?

When I first read your post I was struggling to think of anything positive but I just got home to flowers from a close friend just to say she is thinking of me. I nearly cried. I told her what's happening recently although she did know we were trying a long time ago. She has even had a baby in that time but she was so kind and such a good listener. It's really made me realise how loved we are.

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 19:24:34

Oh @veeboo that’s lovely; what a fantastic friend.

At the end of term a very good friend who I also work with left me a post it and flowers saying thanks for supporting her with work even tho I have so much going on. I love little things like that smile

veeboo Wed 31-Jul-19 20:01:39

@GreyC it's a bonus if telling people I think. Some people are clearly clueless but some just do their best even though they don't know what to say and it's really humbling. I've had cramps for the last few hours. So I'm eating comfort food and having a glass of wine. I know not ideal in the tww but I just can't deal with the idea its a sign of AF!

GreyC Wed 31-Jul-19 20:18:50

Sounds perfect- I’m trying really hard to not ‘put my life on hold’

I’m due AF Friday but I haven’t had any cramps yet so probably more likely be Saturday as I am a day or two out usually. Had some weird tingly pains last week but I did a test Sunday and it was negative so I know it’s just a waiting game now - then onto the big ICSI smile)

veeboo Wed 31-Jul-19 20:24:46

That might have been early to test @GreyC. Keep us updated. Will be thinking of you. My AF isnt due until the 8th but I ovulated late and am expecting a weird cycle

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 21:37:58

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF the annoyin thing is my boss is a man so either will be awkward talking about to him, i think when u bring up anything to with periods they instantly cringe wish he was a woman would be easier! Oh well hopefully it is short how long did u have to take the injections for i know everyones different? Did u get emotional with all the hormones?

2fingers22018 Wed 31-Jul-19 21:39:18

Just realised we re goin to need another new thread nearly at 1000 again!

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Thu 01-Aug-19 07:16:17

@2fingers22018 I know it’s awkward but I’d say that as like you say they cringe and won’t ask lol! Oh gosh feels like ages ago I think it was around maybe 12 days it was slightly longer then what we thought but I was in the lowest dose due to my high risk of ohss! I get quite bad pmt anyway so I think I was probably around the same I think the only thing that made it worse for me was how uncomfortable the bloating can get so I think it just made me Moan a lot more.

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Thu 01-Aug-19 07:36:34

Ekkk also very nervous about my telephone consultation this morning but ever to know what we going to do and if there are any changes to the meds

2fingers22018 Thu 01-Aug-19 08:49:02

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF thanks gd to know do u know when theyr phonin? (roughly) so u wnt need injections this time will u? Or am i being naive i know ul stil need meds to prepare the lining of ur womb. Im not due my period until 18/19 days away so ive got more waiting lol

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Thu 01-Aug-19 09:00:09

@2fingers22018 at 9 so not long!! Yes will still need to injections have to take buserelin from day 21 of cycle to shut down my ovaries then once af has been again I will have a scan to make sure lining is thin and then can start the oestrogen tabs and then I think it’s about a week later 2nd scan to check lining if all good stop injections start pessaries think it was about 5 week process last time! My af isn’t due for another 10 days of its playing ball that is!!

2fingers22018 Thu 01-Aug-19 09:06:03

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF its soo much to take in isnt it? Let us know how ur call goes it is exciting aswell to finally get on with it. Your such a strong person everything youve been through your honestly making me believe i can get through all this x

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Thu 01-Aug-19 09:42:21

@2fingers22018 yes it is so feel a lot better this round as I know what’s what! So just got off the phone pretty much the same as last time just when o start the pessaries I will be on three and not the standard two! Also as I have two day 3 embies I have agreed to thaw them and let them go to day 5 to see if we have any more top quality ones if they are will transfer one and then refreeze the other one! Thankyou for your kind words it is tough but some how you just keep going! next step is to make an appointment with the nurse to go through meds and the process again and consent forms and them I’m ready and waiting to get started!

GreyC Thu 01-Aug-19 17:08:03

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF this is so exciting for you.

Are the meds more straight forward for just a transfer? We could be injecting at the same time haha

GreyC Thu 01-Aug-19 18:28:15

Soo huge baby bomb today.
Previously mentioned friend who has just started trying on her holiday. (3 weeks ago) she’s pregnant - found out today.
I did cry I have to admit. Hardest thing I’m actually seeing her tomorrow to walk the dogs. What am I going to say. Or do.

veeboo Thu 01-Aug-19 20:14:29

Oh @GreyC that's the pits. Is there a reason she has told you so early? Was she sympathetic? If I am honest I think you're coming down with the flu or eaten something funny tomorrow. You dont need to go until you're feeling strong enough. This is an important time for you to be as calm as possible so if you need to, make an excuse.

GreyC Thu 01-Aug-19 20:20:58

We are very close and she knows everything so I think she did it as a ‘heads up’

I think you are right about tomorrow; I need to stay calm relaxed smile

veeboo Thu 01-Aug-19 20:47:04

I see. I guess shes a bit damned if she does, damned if she doesn't but it is reasonable for you to feel how you do. Thinking of you

GreyC Thu 01-Aug-19 20:56:51

Thank you @veeboo.
Shamefully I’m watching glee on Netflix to cheer me up ha!

veeboo Thu 01-Aug-19 21:17:35

No shame in that!

FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF Thu 01-Aug-19 21:35:50

@GreyC well it’s less injections but I think once I’d had transfer and with the extra meds i had like 8 reminders in my phone just so I could remember what I was taking next!
I’m so sorry you got baby bombed but as you are close friends it sounds like she thought she was doing the best thing if she knows what you are going through! Big hugs x

CloudSway Fri 02-Aug-19 07:57:42

Thanks @veeboo @greyC** for those little snippets of positivity, they are like a rock to cling on to when everything is crap! I've settled down a bit now, although af arrived that night which explains me being emotional but also almost tipped me over the edge! Now I'm still a bit teary that my engagement ring seems to be gone forever, but otherwise a bit more stable.. looking for the positive, I didn't know so many ppl cared or knew who I was at work, the entire store seems to be looking for my ring which is very touching.

I'm sorry you've also had a bomb @greyC** but I think you are 100% justified in getting upset, any of your emotions are allowed and ok, and it does sound like she has tried to be sensitive. Like @veeboo says, damned if she does, damned if she doesn't tell you! It's actually nice that she gave you a chance to get emotional privately, if you were already planned to meet up she could have dropped the bomb to your face which is worse. Hope it goes okay for you x

@2fingers22018 @finallytakingtheplungewithivf you are both brilliant for being so psyched up for this, it makes me excited for you and keep trying to work out what might happen and when for us! So if you are okay to keep sharing, it's great to see timescales of what happens when - am i right that you might be starting soon too *@greyC***? I have a feeling I might end up on transfer at the start of December (we have the meds meeting mid September) which for someone in retail that is the worst possible time!! 😆🙈

GreyC Fri 02-Aug-19 08:10:24

Thanks @cloudsway. She really was just being a good friend I think. I am really happy for her.

Yes waiting for AF to show then have to ring the clinic and go in to start down regulation. I’m excited but equally nervous as I don’t like hospitals haha!

CloudSway Fri 02-Aug-19 09:22:26

Just before I say something stupid... what exactly does down regulation mean?! I'd be nervous too, but we're all rooting for you!!

GreyC Fri 02-Aug-19 09:25:38

I am long protocol due to a slightly lower AMH so down reg is when they put your ovaries into a sleep mode so basically switch them off before the stimulation drugs. I only know this when I went in to find out what was going to happen.
Aww thank you- I’m rooting for myself too!!

2fingers22018 Fri 02-Aug-19 12:48:30

@FinallytakingtheplungewithIVF really hope u get sum high quality embros when they thaw nerve wracking and exciting! @GreyC im sorry dont feel guilty bout the way u feel im the same with my sister shes pregnant just now i obvs luv her to bits and wouldnt wish anything but happiness for her but it is hard having it in ur face 24/7 someone living a life that u want..i know i might sound jealous but im honestly not i dnt wish it wasnt her i just wish it was me aswell u prob feel the same way with ur friend glad she didnt tel u face to face that wouldve been soo much worse! @CloudsSway im glad to hear u feel a bit better soo sorry bout ur ring i would be soo upset too its the sentimental value, nice to know that ppl try to help tho small things like that do help makes u realise not everythings bad x im the same with the transfer depending on wether i get booked in on this cycle or my nxt(late sept) im stressing bout my transfer being the same time their babys been born or a few wks old plus the added stress of my work being crazy busy in the build up to xmas!

2fingers22018 Fri 02-Aug-19 12:51:36

Sorry meant to ask who was it that had the scan while on their period ive to get the same august or september tmi but af is soo heavy for me on day2 i dnt understand how that works 😳

GreyC Fri 02-Aug-19 14:05:41

I ha don’t internal scan done on my period - they couldn’t have cared less! Honestly; it was really cool seeing it all on the screen in 3D too 🙈

GreyC Fri 02-Aug-19 14:05:57

Auto correct - I had!

CloudSway Fri 02-Aug-19 15:25:17

I did had a scan during af too, luckily I was very light flow but they looked at me like why are you telling us, it makes no difference so clearly they are used to it! And it wasn't messy in the slightest, I was very surprised!

@greyc I'm slightly low amh too so that's good to know!

Isn't it silly worrying about work when all this is going on, but I can't help it lol, I'll feel bad letting my colleagues down but was really hoping to take a week off when it's done... maybe not at Xmas! What do u do again? @2fingers22018

GreyC Fri 02-Aug-19 16:09:56

So I’ve started spotting ladies... AF is deffo on the way and il ring the clinic in the morning I think to book in eeeeeeeeeek

2fingers22018 Fri 02-Aug-19 16:57:41

@GreyC i know its totally irrational they see it all the time but its cause my af is soo heavy tmi again but if i even go in the shower or bath its a race to get ready when i come out it would literally run down my legs😳 soo embaressing and like u said messy @CloudsSway im the same with work i feel awkward goin in to talk to them bout it i dont want to out myself but i do a weird mix administrative stuff and warehouse work in different locations its gd for variety and i never get bored but theyre always understaffed so i feel like theyl start off being alrite about it n then when they realise just how often i might need to swap shifts and leave early they wnt b happy but what choice do i have? Have u spoken to ur work? Are they understanding?

2fingers22018 Fri 02-Aug-19 16:59:32

There doesnt seem to b any laws to back us up which is ridiculous @GreyC woohoo the one time the sight of af is actually exciting lol

squirrelnutkins1 Fri 02-Aug-19 20:03:13

Starting the journey thread 3

squirrelnutkins1 Fri 02-Aug-19 20:03:29

New thread ready so we don't lose touch x

2fingers22018 Fri 02-Aug-19 22:16:09

@squirrelnutkins1 thanks!

squirrelnutkins1 Sat 03-Aug-19 08:18:18

New thread

Starting the journey thread 3

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