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Early pregnancy after IVF & recurrent miscarriage

(110 Posts)
Hobbes39 Tue 29-Jan-19 14:01:11

Hi - I guess I'm looking for anyone on the same boat....
We have had our 4th fresh round of IVF, this will be our last as I'm 42 soon.
So I have unexplained secondary infertility - we have a naturally conceived DS age 5 and then spent the last 3.5 almost 4 years trying for a sibling.
I had a PUL about 8 months after we started trying then various investigations (all came back fine) and so we started IVF. 4 rounds later, as well as 3 FETs, I've had a chemical, and 2 MMC. It's been pretty heartbreaking.
I am now 5 weeks pregnant from our last round, which is brilliant, but I'm terrified it's all going to go wrong again.

Signs are good - my HCG at 11dp3dt was a good number (391) and while I had a small bleed the night before my beta, all has been well since AFAIK.

I'm due a scan to check all is well in 2 weeks. We have never had a positive 7 week scan - it's always looked dubious/ bad. This last week has felt like an eternity. I am completely unable to concentrate on anything & I'm scared that this last chance will slip away too.
Anyone else is a similar situation and want to keep me company? Thanks x

CritterTamer Tue 29-Jan-19 16:12:21

@Hobbes39 - I wish I could say something to help with the anxiety, but honestly it doesn't go away - at 19+2 following our second round the anxiety is definitely still there, it just shifts to other things. Just take each day as it comes and enjoy being pregnant the best that you can. Here's a hand hold from me flowers Good luck for your scan xxx

DameSylvieKrin Wed 30-Jan-19 19:48:08

Hobbes, I remember you from earlier threads. Congratulations on the bfp and I hope the time passes as fast as it can. All fingers crossed for you.

CatRen Thu 31-Jan-19 07:44:57

Congratulations hobbes ! 💐 What a long process you've been on. So sorry about all the mcs, that must have been awful. I really hope your scan goes well, it's all about waiting, which is so hard!

I've just had my early bfp (not confirmed with beta yet) after 3 years of ttc for #2 and i'm pretty nervous. The last two FETs failed, the first ended in cp at 17dp5dt so I hope to make it that far. Only 6dp5dt now. I think IVF takes away some of the fun of early pregnancy as there's so much anxiety..

Really hoping all goes well, please keep us updated!

Hobbes39 Thu 31-Jan-19 09:18:26

Hi @CritterTamer - thanks for the hand hold - I'm so glad you are so far on and your babies are doing well. I know from the other thread what a hard time you've been going through - so I hope that placenta moves soon!
@DameSylvieKrin - yes, I recognise your name too - thanks for the good wishes. How are things with you?
@CatRen - hi - how are you doing? Good luck - will keep everything crossed for you. It's just such a hard hard slog isn't it? I feel I can't get too excited about things as I don't want to set myself up for a big fall.
At times I start to feel more positive (when my boobs are tender and I'm feeling queasy!) but it comes and goes, and I'm having some cramping - which I know is normal in early pregnancy, but I keep thinking it's going to be over next time I go to the loo. sad
I can not describe how S-L-O-W time is going by. I'm just 5w1d - and cos I tested early I feel like I've been in this waiting game for ages (but it's actually only 11 days!) I have no idea how I'm going to keep sane for another 13 days...🙈

DameSylvieKrin Thu 31-Jan-19 09:33:49

Hi Hobbes, I have a four month old boy, doing well after being born early. He had a 5% chance of making it through birth owing to an IVF related umbilical cord malformation so I know we have been very, very lucky.
I will be thinking of you in the next weeks.

lulahbelle Sat 02-Feb-19 17:09:29

Hey hobbes, not sure if you’ll remember me, but we were on a couple of threads together in 2017 (seems like another lifetime ago!) I just wanted to say I’m so pleased to hear you’ve got another BFP after having such heartbreak last year and I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed for you this time.

Hobbes39 Sun 03-Feb-19 16:17:29

Hi @DameSylvieKrin - goodness, that sounds like you went through a stressful time during pregnancy - I'm so so pleased your wee one made it against the odds x
Hi @lulahbelle a- I remember you too - thanks so much for coming on here and for your good wishes. How are things with you?
Time is STILL SO SLOW. It's unreal. Especially seeing as I feel like months has flashed by before my eyes as my DS gets older and older, but seriously the last 2 weeks have been the longest ever. Im now 5w 4d and I'm feeling tired, queasy and have v tender breasts, so while feeling a bit shitty physically, I'm feeling v hopeful for this time, but also scared stupid that I've allowed myself to feel that.
I also conscious that my DH is hopeful for this time too, so I think he will be at least as broken as me if it all goes wrong... god it's just so hard.
I know I should be feeling so flipping grateful to have got this far - I know I'm lucky in comparison to so many people who are on these boards and haven't had a sniff of a positive test, but it doesn't really mean anything unless you get a healthy baby at the end, does it? I just want next week to hurry up and get here (13th) so we can see what's happening....

lulahbelle Mon 04-Feb-19 08:52:24

All your symptoms sound really positive hobbes, but I know exactly what you mean about that horrible balancing act of feeling positive and negative at the same time! Sadly I’ve got no further than 18 months ago. We changed clinics and have done two fresh transfers and a FET there. The second fresh resulted in an ectopic - on my ovary of all places - and the FET has just failed. So we’re now 6 transfers in and still have nothing to show for it (apart from quite a lot of weight gain). Hang on in there until the 13th - not too much longer to go.

CantBelieveMyLuck Mon 04-Feb-19 14:54:21

I hope you don't mind me coming here, years ago I did all the treatments and didn't have a good time at all. Nearly 7/8 years after stopping we have a positive result, but it is totally nerve wracking.

I'm used to living at the EPAU, I'm trying really hard not to stress too much and worry, but it's hard as it feels like it's going to take what'll feel like years to get to viability.

I've had an ectopic and mc's, plus I have PCOS, endo, diabetes, hypothyroidism and other stuff.

I don't know if I'm welcome here, but our dates are the same I think, but the clearblue test doesn't seem to be giving the same results as EDD. As a few in my situation have been known to do, I've had my result on a test then taken it apart to see if I can decipher how it works.

I know a beta HCG would be the next best bet, I'm just really scared, I think it'll add to the anxiety. I know I'll need to book in with the EPAU for a scan around 7 weeks to check it's in the right place.

The good thing is symptoms, so the usual sore boobs, a bit of nausea here and there. Being moody as anything, which is what got me to test in the first place as one minute I wanted to cry then I was really snappy.

I really wish everyone all the best.

CantBelieveMyLuck Mon 04-Feb-19 15:00:05

Hobbes - the symptoms sound really positive as it's pretty much what I've had. Years back when I was doing treatment I used to go crazy testing, luckily I've resigned myself in, did my second test today. It is amazing to see a positive, please don't feel guilty for it.

I guess the main thing is trying to keep busy and distracted. In the vague hopes time won't drag so much and we're not stuck with our thoughts.

Our due dates are the same hypothetically, but I know that the scan will confirm whether it's right or not. I remember having a bit of a confused talk with a nurse in the EPAU as my dates said one thing, then the scan said another. I know it all relies really on when implantation was.

Really wishing you all the very best.

I hope you don't mind me being here.

Hobbes39 Sun 10-Feb-19 11:12:09

Sorry to have not replied before @lulahbelle - been feeling so ropey.
I so sorry that you haven't had any luck yet, it's so shit thanks.
It's just demoralising isn't it? Do you have any Frosties left? Am thinking of you - and I really hope that you got there in the end xx
Only 3 more days til we see if there is anything growing in my womb - I'm so scared - I've really got my hopes up as I feel like it would be doubly cruel for this to not work out as I feel SO crap being nauseous all day and shattered. While I'm complaining about this tho, I am also grateful as yesterday when it went away for the morning I was scared silly it had all gone wrong... now it's back, I am relieved to feel 🤢.

Hobbes39 Sun 10-Feb-19 11:17:27

And hi @CantBelieveMyLuck - good luck to you too!

lulahbelle Tue 12-Feb-19 18:08:06

Hi hobbes, just wanted to say good luck for the scan tomorrow - will have my fingers crossed for you.

Sadly we have no frosties left so we’re moving onto another fresh round - just hoping this one will be our lucky round!

Hobbes39 Tue 12-Feb-19 18:37:02

Thanks @lulahbelle for thinking of me. I'm a nervous wreck as it's got closer, I'm so scared that it's gone wrong again but I jut don't know it yet...😢
Sorry you are having to go thru another fresh round - I found doing this round hard, really hard, as I'm just so tired of bad news.. I hope that this round is the one for you 🤞 xx

Hobbes39 Wed 13-Feb-19 09:58:46

Omg - it's twins! 2 measuring 7+3 both with good heartbeats! I'm in shock!!!!

Catren Wed 13-Feb-19 11:13:43

Oh my god!!! Two babies!! Massive congratulations! 💐💐💐

lulahbelle Fri 15-Feb-19 11:26:33

OMG hobbes, that’s amazing news - congratulations! Am so pleased for you - and will hope the next transfer is lucky transfer number 7 for me too!

Hobbes39 Fri 15-Feb-19 16:16:04

@lulahbelle - I very much hope it is for you too! Do keep me posted if you would like to x
I'm scared shitless about having problems due to age and multiples... but delighted to have got this far - just hope that they are ok. 🤞

DameSylvieKrin Thu 21-Feb-19 18:16:34

Twins! So happy for you that the scan went well. Here’s hoping that the next 33 weeks (or 30, I guess, since it’s twins) are uneventful.

Jenbot78 Thu 21-Feb-19 19:45:15

Hiya, can I join? I am 7 weeks today from a FET. I have a daughter who is 22 months from the fresh round (2nd round of IVG) that produced this little embryo. I had another embryo left that resulted in a chemical
pregnancy back in September. I have had a miserable few weeks with bits of bleeding and spotting. My scan at the clinic is on Monday at 7+4 but after a miserable weekend last weekend I caved and paid for a private scan. I am so glad I did as even though I had been bleeding there was a yolk sac and a tiny little blob with a heartbeat. So thought it was all over. I am finding early pregnancy anxiety absolutely miserable ☹️. Every day feels like torture and I don’t know how to make myself feel any better! I thought it might be different the second time around...I was wrong!!

Jenbot78 Thu 21-Feb-19 19:45:37


Jenbot78 Thu 21-Feb-19 19:52:58

I meant to add, the bleeding was put down to a Subchorionic hematoma which is like a small bruise in my uterus. Something else to worry myself about!

KatnissMellark Thu 21-Feb-19 20:02:42

Can I join? I'm 10dp6dt- FET. Peeing on sticks like a maniac and hoping it stays positive. This is our sixth round of IVF, have a DS from our fourth. We did lose his twin that round and had a couple of chemicals so pretty much shitting it sad.

Fab re your twins @Hobbes39- did you put two embryos back or has one split?

Hope all goes well on Monday @Jenbot78, not long now.

Hobbes39 Thu 21-Feb-19 20:12:29

Thanks @DameSylvieKrin - it's certainly the slowest few weeks of my life!
@Jenbot78 - hi & congratulations! And yes please join me in my constant state of unease! The bleeding must have been v scary - I hope that that's it not for any scares for you 🤞. I'm now 8w1d - a week on from my scan, and it feels like an age ago. My next scan isn't til 11w when I have my harmony test - which I'm so nervous about. I'm not sure how I'm going to hold out til then - I worry every day that something has gone wrong but I just don't know it yet... Having had 2 MMC i just expect bad news, but I'm still hopeful.

I am more exhausted that I have ever been - and I include the early days of my DS being a baby! I am SO tired I'm barely functioning. I don't think it helps that I have a bad cold, and obv there isn't much I can take for it, but I'm hoping this fatigue is a good sign that my body is busy building babies...🤞 it just feels so slow at the mo. I just want to get to 12+ weeks with hopefully a good harmony result... then I might stop being so scared (for a bit!)

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