Hoping for a baby 2019

[Donnas146]

Anyone else feel sad about it not happening this year? Af is due and I feel down everyone else seems so happy but I don’t feel it this year at all just another reminder we still have no child really
Hoping next year the ball gets rolling on ivf and we have a baby/pregnant/bfp by next New Years
Don’t think I can cope anymore if it doesn’t

[ohbigdaddio]

Hi Donnas146 this whole Christmas period has been tough because we don't have children and want them so much. lt's so geared towards children and families this time of year.

I feel the same as you, it's the marker of another whole year passing and we are no further forwards at all.

Wishing lots of luck for 2019 xx

[FingersXssd83]

I haven't stopped crying the last two days. NY has hit me like a brick after two years TTC and a failed IVF cycle in Oct and still no baby. Everyone else seems so happy and I'm in the worst depression. We're due to start our second cycle at the weekend so really need to get my head sorted but it just feels impossible right now x

[VenusStarr]

Sorry to hear you're in a similar situation to me @Donnas146, af is due in the next couple of days and onto cycle 15. We've started tests and I have fibroids that may be blocking my tubes. Feel like life is on hold for me. I have spent most of Christmas crying. Didn't see in the new year, cried in bed. I know it's not going but I cannot lift my mood or distract myself, it's a big black cloud hanging over me.

Sending you and @ohbigdaddio lots of love and hope. I'm hoping to take each day as it comes xx

[VenusStarr]

Sorry @FingersXssd83 posted at the same time as you. I'm sorry about your ivf cycle. Sending love xx

[MochaToGo]

I hear ya. I feel as though I should be really trying to enjoy being able to go out, and do stuff I couldn't do if I had children. But I'm so over it now, and it can be hard to be positive!

[wearenotacodfish]

Feeling your pain, three IVF cycles last year and a MC on Christmas Day but planning on doing another cycle as soon as we can this year. Hopefully this year will be the year for us all.

[Donnas146]

Thanks for all your replies ladies in a way it’s nice knowing there are you all that understand even though I mean I wish you all didn’t, really just sick of seeing announcements and sil is due any day know to give birth so I’m not looking forward to going for a visit when she does ( I know that’s horrible of me!) we have only just been referred from the gp and my appointment is the end of this month hoping it won’t takw too long to get referred for ivf I think only then I will feel we are actually getting somewhere. Right now I’m focusing on losing weight/ getting best shape I can
What about you ladies what are you trying to focus on instead of ttc? X

[Pinkroseuk]

Yes I feel exactly the same -
Concentrating on loose weight - 1 stone down,3 To go till I can start getting treatment. Wishing by Christmas there will be someone on the way ideally about 6 months gone 🤞
Fingers crossed for you all too xx

[wearenotacodfish]

We are concentrating on sorting our house out but it is so difficult not to obsess with it all.

@Donnas146 the referral process is very much dependent on where you live but I find feeling like I am doing something helps, I was on the phone booking an appointment with my consultant to organise my next round of treatment in the car park of the hospital after finding out I was going to miscarry.

[Whatelsecouldibecalled]

Yep I’ll join you. We started properly trying all our December 2016! And was having unprotected sex a year before that - shit! Just waiting for first consultation at ivf clinic hopefully some time in Feb. It’s shite. Nice to know other are out there too! Good luck ladies

[Re8miss6]

Hey im new here i really wanted to ask a question and i really have no clue how to start a new thread i wanted to know if theres anyone who has had recurrent misscarrages after having 2 perfectly healthy children and when investigated all tests and examined fetal remains were normal with no abnormalities detected ive had all the relevant recurrent misscarrage bloods checked and they can find no reason also had a normal HSG im just after misscarrage no 8 im finding it so hard now like i have no hope left i know im so lucky that i already have 2 amazing children but the constant yearning is still there i was wondering if this has happened anyone else or anyone known to you

[VenusStarr]

None of us have children @Re8miss6, that was the point of the thread.

I'm sorry to hear of your miscarriages if you go to the main infertilty page you can start a new thread there and you may get someonr who's been through similar.

[Re8miss6]

Thank you

[VenusStarr]

@Donnas146 I feel like I've been in a black pit for the last few weeks. I was very anxious yesterday but went for a couple of walks and listened to a podcast which helped. Hoping to go to the gym tonight and get into a routine with that - have really struggled with motivation but my dh is on early shifts so can go with me.

@Whatelsecouldibecalled when did you get referred to the clinic? I'm hoping to be referred to gyne when I see the GP but not sure if he'll need to do a separate referral for fertility clinic or once I'm there it'll all link together. Good luck

We're doing some renovation at the end of January @wearenotacodfish, hoping that tile shopping will distract me. I'm sorry about your miscarriage 💖

Well done on your weight loss @Pinkroseuk, are you following any plan? Hoping to low carb again, did it last year before my wedding and felt much better.

Hope you're OK @MochaToGo

X

[Pinkroseuk]

@VenusStarr I have cut out lunch and having breakfast mid morning - usually a slice toast or cereal bar that keeps me full till dinner. Halved my dinners and no dessert except Fridays (have to have a treat occasionally) and then increased exercise with long walk at lunchtime and then 30-60mins exercise a day on cross trainer.

[Fizzy13]

We've booked a skiing holiday! Maybe that will kick my body into doing something. (very happy to have a holiday looking at snowy mountains and drinking hot choc if it comes to it)
If not at least I'll have a lovely holiday.

[wearenotacodfish]

@VenusStarr referrals to the clinic very much depend on where you live. Where we are it takes a year but some places are less and they will need to do all their own testing before they start treatment. Your gynae referral will be separate and I would have thought they would want to rule out anything first before they proceed with any treatment. I hope that helps but it varies so much from area to area and clinic to clinic from what I can tell.

[VenusStarr]

Thank you @wearenotacodfish, a year?! That's so long! Time is not on our side. Really hope our wait isn't that long. Dh joked yesterday that once I'd had an op to remove the fibroids that we'd be super fertile, popping out babies everything just takes so much time.

Might see if I can get the GP to refer to the fertility clinic at the same time, he'd originally wanted to wait for dh sperm analysis but that's been pushed back to March.

[wearenotacodfish]

@VenusStarr fertility clinics generally won't take referrals unless all the testing has been done so you probably would need to wait for the sperm test first but it can't hurt to ask. Is your weight okay and do you smoke? If there are any barriers you know of to them accepting you for treatment I would sort them whilst you are waiting.

[Whatelsecouldibecalled]

Our referral came through start of December 2018. We started the fertility testing process in Feb 2017 so had taken quite some time!

[VenusStarr]

No, bmi OK and we don't smoke, don't drink lots either @wearenotacodfish. We have debated getting the sperm analysis done privately. It was supposed to be next Tuesday. Will ask the doctor when I see him week after next. I've tried looking up the waiting times and had no luck.

Glad your referral has come through @Whatelsecouldibecalled - what's your next steps?

[Whatelsecouldibecalled]

@venusstar waiting to see consultant at clinic