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IVF & a new job...what to do

(9 Posts)
Pumpkin18 Tue 25-Sep-18 20:17:51

So I am currently in a job which is very stressful and I don't really enjoy anymore although I like the people I work with and it's close to home. I have the chance of a maternity cover job (which would most likely turn permanent) at another company that I used to work for and the job is much less stress but would mean a pay cut and extra travel costs. I am keen to reduce stress levels and I loved working for the company before but they want someone from January time which is when we are looking to have IVF. My old boss there is really nice and is very keen to have me back and I don't want to mess them around and another thing is that I would possibly only get statutory maternity pay. I am waiting for him to confirm what the pay would be but not sure what the best thing to do is. I know I can do the job and there would be no stress (other than am I pregnant or not!) Would you stick current job out until hopefully pregnant or change jobs now?

Guio Tue 25-Sep-18 20:28:57

Hello it is a difficult decision as you know in your current role you will get proper maternity leave.I have stayed in my current role which I don't like but like you good colleagues just because IVF which is starting in November.However, I think holding your life for something that you don't know the outcome of is not good either.I started to try over 2 years ago and since then unhappy at work and I know that if IVF works I will have to stay another 9 months but unless I will be happy!future is so uncertain,isn't it?

hoping2018 Tue 25-Sep-18 20:30:06

Go for the new job. If you become pregnant you'll be over the moon and won't care about lost maternity leave etc. If you're not pregnant you'll be so glad you moved. It's very easy to put your whole life on hold when trying to conceive but who knows how long it will take and your sanity along the way is very important!

EndeavourVoyage Tue 25-Sep-18 20:30:51

The lower stress levels can only help your IVF imo.❤️

Pumpkin18 Tue 25-Sep-18 20:32:35

Thanks for replying, yeah it is difficult when you really don't know what's going to happen. I'm not even sure in my current job what the maternity pay is like so it may also just be statutory. Also I would feel a bit bad taking a maternity cover job when I hopefully might need to go on maternity leave myself.

Pumpkin18 Tue 25-Sep-18 20:37:02

Thanks guys, I agree re the stress levels. In my current job I have a fair amount of responsibility and I just feel like I can't be bothered anymore. The money is good and obviously we need it for IVF as are self funded but we have money for first round saved plus a bit more. I think I will have to think about it a bit more

physicskate Wed 26-Sep-18 09:23:24

I had exactly the same situation - twice!! Once was a four month notice period at a year of ttc (when I still ought I had a chance!!!) and the second was in the run up to ivf. I took both new jobs because I didn't want to be doubly unhappy if it failed (which let's be honest is the most likely outcome).

I started my latest new job at 5 weeks pregnant and my ivf worked. I'm a bit sad sometimes at how much money I walked away from (33k pa vs now on 6k) but couldn't give a shit when I think that it probably wouldn't have worked at the last place because of my insane workload and stress. I went into ivf super chilled and a bit excited about starting my (very) part time job!! And it actually will work soooo much better for childcare too... not that I was thinking about that at the time...

Pumpkin18 Wed 26-Sep-18 10:46:55

Thanks @physicskate the new job for me would still be full time but a no pressure job and hopefully only approx 2k pay cut but I would have travel costs as currently walk to work. My only concern really is lying to them or not telling them about IVF when I would be taking a maternity cover position and that I could be pregnant already when I start the job and then not even entitled to statutory maternity pay. Also a little concerned that if IVF doesn't work and they don't need me after a year or however long the maternity cover is then I would need to get another job

physicskate Wed 26-Sep-18 18:42:07

I felt bad about my new job. I mean I started it pregnant!! But I had no way of knowing how bfp was going to work and work is just a job!! This is so much more important than a job.

And now that I've told my new job they've been so wonderful!! They've already implied they'll extend my contract despite it being a year currently - 5 months of which I'll be on maternity!!

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