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I just don’t see how we can afford IVF.

(68 Posts)
Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 19:58:48

Hello there.

Feeling rather tearful and naive this evening. Just back from our first IVF consultation and due to my age and scan results, the best treatment plan would cost about 19 thousand pounds.
After a series of miscarriages, I had pinned all my hopes on the possibility of starting IVF. I’m feeling very silly as I knew it was expensive but had no idea it would be this much. We just don’t have the savings or the option of going abroad where I’ve read treatment can be cheaper.
The only way we could come close to funding the treatment (after overtime and emptying our savings) would be to ask to borrow from family but what a cheeky thing to consider doing. And even then, I’m well aware that there is no guarantee of success.
We are very very lucky to already have one child but I just can’t help longing for a sibling. More so since my latest miscarriage.
I guess I’m just wondering what to do. Take a chance and try to find the money or just accept that it’s not meant to be.

Thank you xx

glasshalfsomething Mon 21-May-18 20:00:05

What’s stopping you getting treatment abroad? Perhaps there’s a way around it? I know it can be up to half the price!

INeedNewShoes Mon 21-May-18 20:02:29

I paid around 30% of the UK price for fertility treatment abroad. It's very much worth doing some research into clinics in Spain, Denmark, Cyprus to name a few of the countries that have the more established clinics.

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:05:27

Lack of holiday allowance and also the fact that we’d have to bring our child with us. Not sure how that would work.

TeenTimesTwo Mon 21-May-18 20:05:56

Wow that's a lot. We did our IVF around 15 years ago now. I remember something about needing to expect 2 or 3 rounds as they learn what level of drugs you need etc. Are they still saying the same thing now?

Our IVF rounds didn't work and we eventually adopted a sibling pair. It is not the same as giving birth to your own, but it has been a successful way of forming a family for us.

Best wishes whatever you decide.

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:09:10

Oh wow. 30% That’s a huge difference. I must admit, I haven’t researched any clinics abroad as getting any decent amount of leave wouldn’t be possible at the moment.

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:11:18

Thank you TeensTimesTwo.
Yes, that includes rounds of egg collection but only one transfer from what I understand.

Grasslands Mon 21-May-18 20:12:05

Why are you miscarrying?

Blueroses99 Mon 21-May-18 20:16:34

£19k for one round sounds incredibly steep. I would speak to other clinics for a second opinion. I haven’t got experience of IVF abroad but my understanding is that the time at the clinic can be minimal - scans at UK sister clinics, day return flights for egg collection/embryo transfer. I would speak to a few to understand the logistics before writing it off. A few days unpaid leave is likely to be cheaper than the difference in price of having it in the UK. Childcare may also be simpler to arrange if you are away for fewer days (family in the UK, hotel babysitter overseas while you are at the clinic?).

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:18:48

I don’t know. Now I’ve had 3 miscarriages, I’m finally able to be referred to a specialist.
It’s heartbreaking as each time it’s been a missed miscarriage.

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:25:16

Thank you Blueroses. Totally agree in regards to unpaid leave but due to the nature of my husband’s job, his team can’t go below a certain number (hence why he can’t get any substantial leave at the moment).

Grasslands Mon 21-May-18 20:25:23

You need the cause of miscarriage investigated fully.

RandomMess Mon 21-May-18 20:32:03

Your DH can't be refused parental leave for his existing child...


juniorcakeoff Mon 21-May-18 20:34:05

How old are you? What tests have you had for the miscarriages so far? Did you have any probs in pregnancy with your eldest?

Lauren83 Mon 21-May-18 20:35:23

What's been recommended to you for that price? I work in one of the UKs most successful (and expensive) IVF clinics and you would be looking at consultation and investigations, 2 cycles of IVF with PGS, unlimited frozen transfers of euploid embryos (more chance of live birth/less chance of MC) and meds for around 11k

3luckystars Mon 21-May-18 20:39:17

Can he get parental leave?

What does it cost for one round, or I this the price for one round? I have never heard it costing this much unless you are going to that ARGC clinic London are you?

I'm so sorry you are going through this x

littlepooch Mon 21-May-18 20:40:31

That seems very steep. I would definitely get a second opinion. And definitely push to be seen by recurrent mc clinic. And have the causes of mc investigated.

I agree with other posters that time spent abroad can be minimal - perhaps post asking for advice from anyone who has done this?

Sending lots of hugs to you xx

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:40:33

I’m 42. I’ve been referred for miscarriages so not had any tests yet. Seeing a consultant next month.

Frustratedfrenchie Mon 21-May-18 20:42:58

In France, IVF is free for everyone under 43 (if resident) and if you have to pay it costs usually around €2400. Might be worth looking for options abroad?

Lauren83 Mon 21-May-18 20:44:10

That also includes freezing, extended culture and embryoscope too, 1 standard round of IVF is usually around 5k-5.5k all in so 19k is ridiculous

Also for treatment abroad it is cheaper, if you find a clinic here to monitor you could just go over for egg collection and embryo transfer so only 2-3 days and you have a blast transfer you could fly home between as flights are usually cheap to a lot of Europe. Your DP could get away with just going over for egg collection or if easier for childcare so as not to take DC he could fly out on a day before you to freeze a sample then fly home the same day, that's if you really wanted to do it with minimum time over there

Twickerhun Mon 21-May-18 20:46:37

I went abroad for ivf twice it was much cheaper. Only needed 5 days leave each time and took DS the second time which worked fine

Twickerhun Mon 21-May-18 20:47:12

You need to shop around with a quote like that - that’s so expensive

tenbob Mon 21-May-18 20:48:48

That sounds very high
It's more than I paid for a round at the notoriously-expensive ARGC, where I had to have lots of expensive drugs and blood tests for an underlying autoimmune condition and immunology issue which was causing failed implantations and missed miscarriages

Have they broken down the costs for you?

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:54:26

It includes monitoring scans, clinical advice, treatment plan consultation, 3 egg collections, embryo freezing and storage for 12 months, blastocyst culture, Pre-implantation Genetic Screening with Next Generation Sequencing, 1 embryo transfer, pregnancy blood test and early pregnancy scan. Plus it includes the medication and all the other hidden extras.

Yazzi3 Mon 21-May-18 20:58:45

Can I just say thank you so much for all the replies. I feel embarrassed by how little I know about things. Just trying to pull myself together from my recent miscarriage.
I am certainly going to look into clinics abroad as I imagined having to be out there for ages which is why I assumed it wasn’t an option.

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