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TTC no 2 after IVF for no.1

(5 Posts)
Jenbot78 Sat 04-Nov-17 10:54:00

Hello, just wondering if anyone else is in this position that I can chat to? Either on this thread or another...Have my beautiful DD1 and so lucky for that after 3.5 years and 2 ivf treatments (also on steroids for the one that worked) for so called 'unexplained infertility.' I put this in inverted commas as I strongly believe that it can be explained by the raging autoimmune attack on my thyroid.

Anyway, whatevs...I thought once I had my dd I would be chilled out about having another. Boy was I wrong. I am just as obsessed as before and dd is only 6mos. Just so terrified of getting back on that rollercoaster again. On the one hand i just want to enjoy my daughter but on the other just have this hole that needs to be filled.

Looking for others experiences of conceiving DC2 after infertility. Is it normal to feel so strongly about this?

For those still in the trenches for TTC1, please don't think I am being ungrateful or greedy or whatever, I know how lucky we are. I just can't shake this feeling...

We have 2 embies on ice but might try naturally for a while. Just finishing Breastfeeding now. I should add, time is not massively on our side as I am 39....

Sorry for the long post!

physicskate Sat 04-Nov-17 11:09:09

How ironic. The last words out of my mouth were concern about this exact same thing!! I’m just starting infertility stuff after ttc 20 months and a probable pcos diagnosis...

I was just saying to dh that one of my concerns if we do end up having to go through more treatment (I tend to get a bit ahead of myself trying to anticipate how each possibility makes me feel / try to process), is that I don’t really want to have an only child. I know how much I value my sister!! I’m a teacher and with some kids, you can just ‘tell’ they’re an only child...

I have no advice. Just want to let you know I’ve had the same thoughts...

Oh and still ttc number 1!

clairettc Sat 04-Nov-17 12:12:47

Also trying to conceive number 1 and in the throws of bloody thyroid problems and apparently having an autoimmune disease has given me premature ovarian failure at the grand old age of 31! But nevertheless can’t help but think I’ll want 2 and will not be happy with one. Which is ridiculous as one might be a miracle at this current rate! And I’d be over the moon to have a child!

Ranting now but in conclusion I completely understand - using your Frosties won’t cost too much though ? (Compared to a whole new cycle) so if I were you with age not on your side I’d just get on with using them!

Chattycat78 Sat 04-Nov-17 12:33:39

I was in this boat in 2015. Ds was an ivf baby because I was told I had low ovarian reserve age 34.

I was sure he would be an only child and very anxious about the prospect of trying again. I was even visualising what it would be like when all my Nct class had second babies and I didn't.

However something rather unexpected happened. My period came back after 8 months when I stopped breastfeeding so we decided to ttc immediately. I had very low expectations.

4 weeks later I got a bfp- I only poas to rule out pregnancy as I was sure my cycle was all over the place after breastfeeding.

In actual fact, it was a twin pregnancy- unfortunately we lost the second baby at 12 weeks.

However - the first twin was fine and born 17 months after his big brother!

It can happen and when doctors heard my story they said that ivf can sometimes do that- it kind of kicks your body into action or something.

Saying that- if you have embies, maybe consider using them first- that's what I'd do I think. We weren't in that position after our ivf.

Jenbot78 Sat 04-Nov-17 14:07:27

Thanks all for your messages, really helpful. Clairettc I really feel for you, autoimmune issues and thyroid issues are SO hard. I did a lot of research on this issue and am still working on my own health journey. Not sure if there is a PM function on here but would be happy to tell you about my findings! Chattycat what a great story. Thanks for sharing. Physicskate best of luck!

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