IVF advice and support please

[Brighteye3986]

Last week I went to see a gynaecologist as after almost 2 years of ttc we have not gotten anywhere. I have now been told that our only way of conceiving will be with assisted conception. I found this difficult to take in and accept when I first found out but am slowly coming to terms with it. In order to be referred I have to get my BMI to under 30- currently 32. I have my next appointment early April but was hoping people could give me some support advice that have been through/ going through the same thing.

TIA x

[meadowlark3]

Didn't want to read and run-I had a similar shock last week when I was told We would be referred immediately for IVF. Did the gynae do any testing, or just base the IVF recommendation on the duration of your TTC? If you haven't had any other tests (bloods, semen analysis, HSG, etc), there should be other steps between TTC and IVF...

It has been about ten days since our consultant told us we would go for IVF and the bit of time passing has let it settle and I am feeling a bit better about it now. (Or at least not the sheer panic I had before!)

[einalem1984]

I just want to give you a bit of hope- I tried to conceive for 3 years and after a successful round of IVF last year we now have a baby girl. Good luck and let me know if you have any qs about process x

[Brighteye3986]

I have had most of the tests carried out as I was referred to a private hospital first as my MIL pays for it. So have had a pelvic scan, transvaginal ultrasound, bloods tests, swabs have been taken and I've had an internal done too. Only thing left is the HSG which they don't do there so have to wait until April when I have been seen by the consultant on the NHS. I am already working on my weight loss and have been since November. Hubby has also had tests carried out previously via the GP too. So other than the HSG, I'm not too sure what else there is in between seeing the consultant and being referred except my weight loss and being within the guidelines for the NHS?!

[einalem1984]

This might be a bit of a personal question but do you have painful periods at all or pelvic pain? It's just that I have endometriosis and found that was what was stopping me from getting pregnant x

[MTMFH]

I just wanted to give you some hope as I know how scary and uncertain this whole process is. I have severe endometriosis, one tube and possible adenomyosis. It took four years and four operations before we got to IVF. But it worked, against all the odds, and our daughter is asleep in front of me.

The only good advice I can give is to take one step at a time and try not to think too far ahead. It can seem overwhelming but breaking it down and dealing with each separate stage can help. Best of luck

[Brighteye3986]

My periods vary sometimes I get every pain and symptom possible and sometimes it makes an unnoticed appearance! PCOS has been ruled out but there was no mention of endometriosis at my appointment last week. I have had abdominal surgery when I was 8 and I'm pretty sure the consultant thinks is adhesions/ scar tissue causing the issues. My cycles vary from 26 days through the 36/37. They have reduced over the last year though as they were around 40-45 days.

[Brighteye3986]

Thanks MTMFH.

I spent most of last Wednesday crying and even the weekend too. Hubby has been trying to cheer me up with flowers and lots of cuddles but obviously it's hard for him too. I think it was shock more than anything as I wasn't prepared at all for IVF to be the answer. I have already done a little bit of research so I can kind of prepare myself for the physical side of it but it's the emotional side that is difficult. I'm hoping that when I go back in April I will get a bit of a better understanding about it. I just hope that the wait for the HSG isn't too long.

[MTMFH]

Allow yourself to cry. It's normal. I felt I was grieving for a 'normal' fertility journey. It's so overwhelming. Before we started and I was having a bad day, I would google positive stories to give me hope, it used to help.

[toffeepuddin]

I found it depressing too when it dawned on me I wouldn't get pregnant naturally. Ive got told I've got fibroids or adenomyosis, getting a hysterscopy soon hopefully. My BMI was 30 but still my consultant said I had to lose a half a stone. Very strict but it's understandable, u want the best chance of success with IVF especially if your get it free on NHS.
Good luck OP, xx

[Brighteye3986]

Thanks toffeepudding. At the moment they are saying it's either unexplained fertility or adhesions. I think that's the hardest part for me to accept- not being able to naturally conceive. At the moment I'm trying to take my mind off of it so have turned my attention to my kitchen refurb instead!

[einalem1984]

From what you've said it's possible you could have endometriosis and it might be worth looking on the endo uk website to see if your symptoms match up. Unfortunately if you want to know for sure you'd have to have a laparoscopy operation. I found I have it October 2015 and my left reproductive organs weren't working properly so if I'd have started IVF without the operation it would have been a waste of time. To give you some hope, I got pregnant on my first round of IVF with only 2 eggs so miracles can happen! Xx